Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

Lifestyle Relationships
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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

thanks Sara :)

Im sorry, but i dont think someone telling me that I have a double chin during my pregnancy rude. Maybe im a bit more thick skinned.. or have grown to be. I dunno.

there are a lot worst things that can be said...

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

Let it go.

All she did was state a fact. She may not meant it to be rude. There is no reason to make an issue about it.

Also, if she DID mean for it to be rude, then you will simply be giving her the satisfaction of participating in her drama. Not worth it.

But really, I think you are making too much of this. Focus on the baby. Best wishes!

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

ur mil .. shes the real culprit here ..

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Re: Rude comments from husband’s khala - confront her or no?

^ :smack:

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

not sure what you're thanking me for, and you missed my point.

anyway, I'm agreeing with everyone that OP should just let it go...its not that big of a deal. but i can see why she wouldn't be happy to hear that. there's really no reason to tell someone "oh so and so said this about you" when it's clearly not a very nice thing that was said.

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

Consult your lawyers. A legal notice should soften her up.

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

LOL!

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

It's not the most flattering comment. It wasn't a tactful thing for khaala to say but neither was it tactful of ur MIL to tell u what her sister said. It makes me question ur MIL's intentions because not only does it make her sister look bad in ur eyes and thus create ill feelings b/w u two...it creates unnecessary tension for her pregnant DIL. She could have done without. Bringing it up w/khaala even in a joking way which honestly didn't sound that jokey to me......it carries a strong undertone of being pissed..... u'll only show her she has the power to get under ur skin. And it'll cause problems b/w u n mil n eventually ur husband. A small part of the body causing so many problems. You can't get back every person who finds u less than pretty. In this case if the majority of friends n relos think u look well...be happy with that rather than dwell on one person. Pregnancy will bring about other more pronounced physical changes...cant get worked up over every comment. Be the bigger and smarter person here (smarter than ur MIL
) n let it go.

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

I think the MIL is in the wrong here. MIL asked khala what she thinks of DIL now that DIL is pregnant and khala said something to MIL in assumed confidence. I dont think khala is being rude.

We all have opinions about people that we would not tell them to their face but may share with others. The MIL should've had enough sense that;

a) You're pregnant, shouldn't deal out crap like that
b) her own sister told her something in assumed confidence and here she is telling you

It isn't rude the khala told the MIL. Her saying that dosen't lower her opinion of you or anything. Its very very rude that the MIL divulged this to you.

How did this conversation come about? I don't suppose the MIL just said out of the blue "Btw sis sez you got two chins LOL". The fact that your MIL would share something like this with you at a time like this makes me wonder if shes even slightly exaggerated it. Regardless though, the MIL is the antagonist here, not the khala.

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

maybe the MIL really didnt think it was rude... hence didnt think it was a problem telling the DIL? as i said, not everyone sees things as another may..

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

Tell your mil and her sis that you're pregnant and you're supposed to be fat. duh

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Re: Rude comments from husband’s khala - confront her or no?

LOL!! Why are you getting so hyper? :rolleyes:

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

I think this was a way for your MIL to insult you , but using her sister as a shield.

j/k j/k j/k

A lot of people in our society are quite insensitive and say whatever pops into their minds, regardless of how it may make others feel. Don't let this get you down. And Congrats on the pregnancy. iA you have a smooth one and a healthy baby.

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

You've just admitted that you have a double chin because you've put on some pregnancy weight, therefore your khaliya-saas didn't say anything wrong, it was merely the truth. Should she have said the obvious, maybe not - but at least she's not making up things about you.

The key is to not be so sensitive and to take offense at what others say. They'll say what they want and it's up to you how you react to it. In the larger scheme of things arguing or confronting someone over something so petty is totally not worth it.

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

I completely agree with everything you wrote above. Yes, often people say things without thinking at all. My best friend just had her 3rd child 2 months ago and during all her 3 pregnancies (and after birth), she would tell me all the thoughtless comments other women made to her regarding her appearance. Heck I know a desi girl (32) who husband committed suicide last year. Just 6 months after this, she attended her best friend's wedding and the comments people made to her (people who knew her "situation") made my blood boil.

I don't find it hard to believe that the MIL is a rude person. I guess I just don't refer to people like her in a nice way saying that they just didn't assess the situation. This is just my opinion but any woman (especially those who have experienced pregnancy) who choose to make or share negative comments towards another pregnant woman's body is either a bi*ch IF she's doing it to hurt her intentionally.

However, in cases where they make comments without thinking twice.....then yes, its rude and insensitive. And frankly, ANYONE who shares a 3rd person's negative opinion with a pregnant woman about her body and honestly doesn't even realize that it has the potential to cause hurt/anger really is an idiot.

What amazes me is that crap this like (especially with pregnant women) is usually done by other WOMEN! Somehow majority of the men I know seem to have figured out that comments regarding a pregnant woman's body is better left unsaid.

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

+1, odds are in her favor as she suffered mental anguish in her pregnant state.

BTW OP, you said rude "comments", where are the rest? Please share so we can extend the thread further.

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

Then ask them why THEY have double chins. Are they pregnant too? :@:

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

you know, it's funny you say that--you'd think women who've had children should be nicer and more understanding ot other pregnant women; however, I find sometimes guys and women who've never been pregnant are much more tactful. I browse another website from time to time and oh my god any time a certain pregnant woman is featured, all the nasty women come out fo the woodwork... "what a fat cow, she can't lose weight". Case in point: jessica simpson/Aishwarya rai.

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

yes it does dear but dont you think what it makes you when you call idiots to someone of your mother's age??
it doesn't look good dear!

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Re: Rude comments from husband's khala - confront her or no?

I would be more pissed at MIL for even telling you what her sister said. Who does that?
She should've known better ... that is so rude and inconsiderate.