let’s say you made arrangements to be picked up by a friend to go somewhere.
If you write your friend a text saying
“pick me up at 4:45 because it takes 15 min to get to X”
…
Is there something rude you notice about that?
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maybe he is missing a 'please' in your text.
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doesnt please depends how close the friendship is?
PC... no i dont find anything wrong in it. ............ ya plz...... if she is just a friend.
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A close old friend who doesn’t care for formalities. The please wasn’t what she was annoyed by.
I just didn’t get why that’s rude. She thought I was “taking over the situation”
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happens sometime, other can have a bad day too !
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Well she was pointing out that be careful because others may think that's rude because it seems like you're trying to take over the situation. I just didn't see that. I want second opinions.
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It's a text message. To a close friend. There isn't anything in there that I would construe as rude. Even if you sent it to someone you barely knew, it would have been ok though much improved with a "please" or "would you mind."
But getting upset over something like this is a sign of someone who is a bit too oversensitive...a bit too eager to find the negative in every little thing. Sorry PCG...I don't want to insult your old friend, but that's how it looks to me. There are all sorts of major things to get upset about...getting worked up about this is kinda silly.
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She had a bad day. I normally add in a few words of admiration in my text messages like wanker just to get the message across.
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There is nothing wrong with ur txt!!!
let's say you made arrangements to be picked up by a friend to go somewhere.
If you write your friend a text saying
"pick me up at 4:45 because it takes 15 min to get to X"
....
Is there something rude you notice about that?
Rude? Not sure. Blunt, yes.
"Could you pick me up at 4:45?"
OR
"Is it possible you pick me up by 4:45?"
........would have been fine.
Even if please is not written, there were two things wrong here,
1- It was not a request and sounds like an order or blunt statement.
2- Adding statement of time limit (15 min) was not a good idea when asking anyone for a favor.
No matter how good relation is, it is always safe to add few words to make other person glad to do favor in relaxed manner.
Anyhow making a big deal of it depends how the other person took it and in what mood and all of it depends what kind of relation two people have. With a good relation going, other person could have ignored the bluntness of the statement.
I know when sending a text message we don't think of some formalities or spellings and just want the message across.
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hmmm or u can make it a question? are u gona pick me up at this time?...... so if she has a control problem.... it stays with her.
but dont worry.... if she can be upset on such small things... i am sure she will be happy with some makhan bazi.
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It probably sounded like you were giving her instructions about what to do, when she probably thought she is doing you a favour by picking you up.
let's say you made arrangements to be picked up by a friend to go somewhere.
If you write your friend a text saying
"pick me up at 4:45 because it takes 15 min to get to X"
....
Is there something rude you notice about that?
It's not incredibly rude...and I don't think it would sound so if you said it someone whom you're pretty close to.
But I can also see how it sounds like an "order." And it might make the one on the receiving end feel like they're being bossed....hence perceived as rude.
^If that's the case, then adding a couple of words might make it sound less "rude" to the person. Example: "Could you please try to pick me up at 4:45 because it takes 15 min to get to X."
^You don't know what state the other person (receiver) of the message might be in. Perhaps they were in a rush...or bogged down with something.....or in a bad mood....when you sent the message.
Also depends on whom you're saying it to. I'd more likely word it the way you did if I were talking to my sister....or a really close friend.....someone whom I can be really frank with and don't have to worry too much about formality with. But then again, I also know that if my sister, for example, was bogged down with something or stressed....she'd interpret my message as bossy and get annoyed.
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there is nothing wrong in this text .. at least to me .. .. i go way more rude at the situation and even then my friends are okay ..
"oye .. pick me at 4:45 otherwise I am not gona pay you a dollar" .. ..
in your case, probably she was already pissed off at something else and your text seemed rude to her just because of some other situation .. let it go and don't talk about this specific situation with her .. after sometime she would definitely realize it .. (if she is mature enough .. otherwise look at your words before talking to her).
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my god! too sensitive .. your friend ..
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agreed
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Some people like to be asked for stuff so it might help if you change this into a question instead of a statement in the future for this friend. Otherwise nothing rude as I see it, she's pissed off at something else most likely.
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If I get this txt from someone whom I am giving a ride, I will find it slightly rude. I am picking up the person so his/her txt should have a reflection of gratitude. This txt is like giving the me an order.
I will definitely txt this msg to my cab driver or chauffeur but not to my friend.
It's not rude, are you kidding me?
rude would be, "aye bewaqoof aake mujhe pick karo jaldi"
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I dont think its that rude.
It seems like your friend is not only having a bad day but is a bit on the sensitive side as well as controlling. She feels threatened by a text message?