Re: rishtas for desi girls born and raised abroad
Far be it from me to determine the level of religiosity of the girls in Pakistan and their Western counterparts, but I was surprised to find even religion on the list…making me think …peechay reh kya gaya?
Islamic studies, based on my knowledge, is a mandatory part of the education curriculum in Pakistan. Provided that Islam is also practiced in the homes, that would mean kids in Pakistan receive exposure to religion on both fronts (the home and the school). In the West, this would only be the case if kids are enrolled in an Islamic school and religion is also practiced in the home. Otherwise, the exposure to religion is predominantly coming from the home. Also, the values in Pakistani society are fairly homogenous whereas in the West it is more likely for one to feel an inner conflict between Islamic values and those of Western culture.
For argument’s sake, Reha, you may say that THIS conflict between Islamic values and the trends/values of Westen macro-culture is the very reason why parents in the West try extra, extra hard to reinforce religion. Fine, I can understand that…however it’s not enough to so boldly make the assertion that girls in the West focus on religion more, implying those back home are less interested/vested/concerned/bothered about religion. I say this because the word “focus” implies a deliberate interest and effort. One could even argue that the lack of employment and other opportunities in Pak leaves the girls with more time to focus on deen (apart from just looks) as well, no? Majority of my family, both maternal and paternal, live in Pakistan and I cannot say that they are…on the whole…less focused on religion than me. On the contrary, I think they are much better on that front as well as other areas.
I can understand limitations in the sense of employment and opportunities, but religion…too? Even within a limited sphere, one can still try to be the best they can be…the best daughter, best sister, best individual, best Muslim, etc. I think that in the end if we’re going to say that marriage happens if and whenever Allah has destined it, then leave it at that…let Him be the judge of who is more pious, or living to their utmost bestest.
All this hypocrisy makes me want to puke, a combination of the most corrupt and most religious all in one place. Yeah all the Rashis have Daris. My friend from Karachi shared with me that as a boy he was vey good looking and he used to take public bus to school and most of the times he used to get inappropriate touching and adjustments..surprise surprise mostly by religious people with Dari, Topee and tasbeeh.