when we’re kids we take things for granted and think that the way things are are how they’re supposed to be. I always thought that the whole arranged marriage/chai parade thing must work optimally… which is why it’s used so extensively in Pakistan. after all if it wasnèt the best method and didn’t work, why would the majority go that route… there must be an algo or something that people use to optimize their spousal match… and so everyone ends with the right spouse for them…
and then you grow up… and realize what a lottery the whole thing is… and how dependent you are on your parents’ network/connections in the community or lack of…