rishta "signs"?

[soconfused]

Re: rishta “signs”?

@partyslims

I read most of this thread, and am I the only one who has no idea what the OP is trying to express? soconfused, I got a bit of what you were trying to say, but let me try and summarize:

You got a rishta from a family you like but haven’t met the guy.
Your families are pretty compatible in terms of religion/culture stuff.
They want someone of higher education, but not a doctor, and you are planning on attending medical school
The reason they don’t want a doctor is because the education takes too long.
You are on the West coast, their family is in New York, and the guy is abroad somewhere.

If all this is correct let me pose some questions to you now soconfused:

The first and most important question is What do YOU want?? I’m assuming you are in college at the moment and are going to be applying for medical school, which over here in the US is normally a four year process. And that is before you get into specialization etc, which is another two to four years, depending on what you do. So you are looking at , at least 6-7 years, and that depends what year of college you’re in currently. Most people I know who became doctors have wanted to from a pretty early age and are pretty dedicated to that. Has this been a life long dream of yours to be a doctor? Are you willing to put that on hold or not do it?

Ok, also pretty important, have you seen the guy? Do you know what he looks like or do you not care at all?

Hi, Im’ sorry, I guess my thoughts are pretty scrambled and all over the place. I think I’m just confused in general as to wth happened…was that a formal rishta? What is the process from here on out? Are they even interested, etc? They never explicitly said they don’t want a doctor, all they kept saying was that they wanted someone that was educated as that was the only demand from their son. I just tend to be one of those people that views the glass as half empty and I’ve been clingling to that comment about med school being “so long”. They said they’re fine with the guy moving wherever as there’s no gaurantee he’s going to get a job in NY. And I explained to them that I have applied everywhere (mostlyoutside the west coast) so I hope I made it clear that staying on the west coast is not one of my “conditions”

I actually have graduated already, just working and applying to medical schools right now. I want to be a dr, whether that happens next year, in 2 years, in 5 years, in 10 year, whatever. I’m fine with marrying as long as there is the understanding that I WILL be a doctor. I know what the guy looks like, but I haven’t spoken with him yet. I’m not trying to seem desperate or anything (I’m not desperate to get married) but I AM one of those people that is impatient and needs answers immediately about everything since I tend to plan everything out. So I guess this thread was me…panicking about this random unknown element that has now presented itself into my life.

Thanks for the advice. God bless.