So i see that the ABCD girls have problems finding a good rishta in their respective countries…
the reasons seeem to be the following..(from what i read from threads here)..
+Less choice of potentials due to shortage of pakistani families (simple stats)
+Girls not willing to move to pakistan…(change of country is difficult offcourse)
+Scared of pakistani rishta due to the fear that the guy is only after visa…hence overcautious ..(valid concern)..also pakistani guys are too traditional/backwards for their liking i guess…
But…
The biggest issue seems to be that the ABCD guys preferring pakistani born girls to the ABCD ones .which pisses off the ABCDs…and i see a lot of resentment from the ABCD girls on being compared to the pakistani girls …
But what i don’t understand is why the ABCD guys prefer Pakistani born girls…why is that?
ABCD = Foreign born and bred..not necessarily american/british..any foreign born…
Nomi bhai,I also don't get this, as u say Abcd girls don't want to marry a guy coz they think he might want only citizenship from them,But when same guy go to back home and get married then why Abcd girls complain???
Nomi to answer your question…its because typically ABCD guys have done all the “bad” things that ABCD girls do (but nobody calls them bad boys) but then go to pakistan seeking “pure” girls. It’s this hypocrisy that pisses girls off.
I , too, used to hate this and worry about it but now I say good riddance. if someone thinks a certain way about you/who you are, why impress them?
Then again im also married and (hopefuly iA) will never be in that rishta situation ever again so I can say this freely
I can't stand it when ABCD/BBCD or pakistani guys think girls not born in pakistan are not marriage material. I mean seriously, just because we have got British or American attached to us we are labelled no good. I am not saying not to marry in pakistan, u can if you want to but don't go around saying that the pakistani born girls are pure and we are some sort of sluts. B/c you guys may be "bad guys" as in done all the clubbing and what not and maybe come across girls doing the same but that does not mean all girls do it here. There are many good and shareef girls in western countries.
Also I would like to add, what about the sisters of ABCDs??? They must be bad girls to and not pure.
But this hypocrisy is all related to the ABCD people right? Pakistani people have nothing to do with this hypocricy or attitude…since the guys who are being ‘bad’/hypocritical are ABCDs
Just for the sake of argument…the ABCD guys are brothers of ABCD girls… so these ABCD guys have lived with ABCD girls (sisters n others) all their life…so there in no issue of ‘perceptions’/‘assumptions’/‘generalisations’
…and they think that ABCD girls are not marriage material…now why would they think that??
So i see that the ABCD girls have problems finding a good rishta in their respective countries....
the reasons seeem to be the following..(from what i read from threads here)..
+Less choice of potentials due to shortage of pakistani families (simple stats)
+Girls not willing to move to pakistan...(change of country is difficult offcourse)
+Scared of pakistani rishta due to the fear that the guy is only after visa...hence overcautious ..(valid concern)..also pakistani guys are too traditional/backwards for their liking i guess...:D
I think its because Pakistani girls are raised in a different environment compared to foreign girls. And unlike Pakistani born girls foreign girls will stand up for themselves and some desi men don't like that.
I am grossly generalising here but just my observation, and as I said since I am generalising I may be wrong.
it would be wrong to mention all desi men.......its the ABCD desi men who are preferring pakistani girls over the 'standing up for themselves' ABCD girls......with whom they grew up and interacted all their life......
ABCD khawateen want (massive generalization here for inciting terrorism):
all the rights that Islam give them + the rights they deserve being in a western country - all the responsibilities our culture expects of a desi wife (saying they are backward and not applicable in the west) - all the responsibilities western culrutre expects from a good wife (saying they dont’t apply to desi community)
it would be wrong to mention all desi men.......its the ABCD desi men who are preferring pakistani girls over the 'standing up for themselves' ABCD girls......with whom they grew up and interacted all their life......
If this is the case, ABCD men preferring marrying girls who are from back home, it is usually because it's a value instilled in them from their mothers, who in general would prefer a suljhi hui girl etc etc. Ones that can think for themselves, or let's say it, not so "obedient" would go for a wife that is compatible to them, in experiences and thinking as well.
On the other hand, you also have the type of guys, and girls, that are just like, ok, mummy wants me to get married, I'll go with whoever she chooses, regardless of if she's imported or not.
all the rights that Islam give them + the rights they deserve being in a western country - all the responsibilities our culture expects of a desi wife (saying they are backward and not applicable in the west) - all the responsibilities western culrutre expects from a good wife
kakaballi, this is precisely what Pakistani women want also.
One fact you are forgetting is that same western bred girl is the one that went back to pakistan with him. Yes she complained but don’t tell me pakistani born girls don’t complain!!! So you guys are saying girls in pakistan are just easy to walk over and they won’t say anything, you guys don’t know pakistan. (i am not generalising against pakistani girls) They know how to fight for themselves too.
Comparing pakistani girls with ABCDs is like comparing village and city girls from pakistan. Oh because she is born in the village she knows how to do “sevaa” of her husband properly and what not!
I don’t undertand how men think, they don’t like independent girls(Some western girls) but also get irritated that their pakistani born girls are to dependent(also some not all).
