I think that rise in rates is simply due to the fact that men and woman now realise that being happily divorced is better than being miserably married.
All of the reasons for a marriage to fail are still the same, only now people live longer than they did in the past. With an increase in life expectancy means more time living miserably. 30-40 miserable enough, now people have to stay together for 60-70 years. That is a looong time.
It's sad to see a marriage fall apart, and while some people may enter into it hastily, for most it is a very difficult decision. In the end, the emotional toll a bad marriage takes on a family and their children is simply not worth it. Live happily and healthily or move on!
How many 27 yr old guys get married because they have a yearning for kids and family?
Children are a by-product of marriage. Society can organize itself in radically different ways to bring children up.
well my point exactly...what 27 year old man wants to be bound down to one woman and change diapers? very few...but a lot will do it because society deems it necessary for a man to settle down with a woman and only then will she raise his kids as a mother...if you're rich you can hire nannies but will those children have the love that a mother can provide....
i dont think society/culture/nature could come up with another way in the thousands of years of evolution...eventually human beings survived as the dominant species on the planet because they care for their young in a very protective way.
Now as for society/culture/nature coming up with another way to raise children besides their mothers raising them? uhm well evolution has yet to select out another way (you're suggesting communal raising or child farms???)
well my point exactly...what 27 year old man wants to be bound down to one woman and change diapers? very few...but a lot will do it because society deems it necessary for a man to settle down with a woman and only then will she raise his kids as a mother...if you're rich you can hire nannies but will those children have the love that a mother can provide....
i dont think society/culture/nature could come up with another way in the thousands of years of evolution...eventually human beings survived as the dominant species on the planet because they care for their young in a very protective way.
Now as for society/culture/nature coming up with another way to raise children besides their mothers raising them? uhm well evolution has yet to select out another way (you're suggesting communal raising or child farms???)
I think in Pakistan the reasons are what traditionally was cosidered a normal marriage.
1. Girls stand up for themselves.
2. they do not tolerate abuse anymore.
3. they have become financially more independent so they think why to waste our lives like this.
4. Men are still chuvanists. The stigma of divorce is less as compared to old times.
So, usually women think its better to take their own ways.
I feel sorry for people who say women do not tolerate more or compromise more.
Marriage is a sacred institution for two people. Both parties need to work a hundred percent for it to work out.
How can you still have that 100 year old thinking and still justify it.
I think in Pakistan the reasons are what traditionally was cosidered a normal marriage.
1. Girls stand up for themselves.
2. they do not tolerate abuse anymore.
3. they have become financially more independent so they think why to waste our lives like this.
4. Men are still chuvanists. The stigma of divorce is less as compared to old times.
So, usually women think its better to take their own ways.
I feel sorry for people who say women do not tolerate more or compromise more.
Marriage is a sacred institution for two people. Both parties need to work a hundred percent for it to work out.
How can you still have that 100 year old thinking and still justify it.
Lady, you make it sound like women were served a course of ass kicking with every single meal. More than half the marriages are going straight down the ****ter. Are half of the ladies being abused by men? Are half of them in a situation where they have to stand up for themselves? Take your head out of where the sun don't shine, a woman can walk out of a marriage with half of a man's belongings and a nice monthly pay cheque. As long as a lady isn't clinically insane she is sure to get child custody. Meanwhile the oppressors, the chauvinists, the abusers, they kill themselves way more often after a divorce than the oppressed.
Lady, you make it sound like women were served a course of ass kicking with every single meal. More than half the marriages are going straight down the ****ter. Are half of the ladies being abused by men? Are half of them in a situation where they have to stand up for themselves? Take your head out of where the sun don't shine, a woman can walk out of a marriage with half of a man's belongings and a nice monthly pay cheque. As long as a lady isn't clinically insane she is sure to get child custody. Meanwhile the oppressors, the chauvinists, the abusers, they kill themselves way more often after a divorce than the oppressed.
I am talking about Pakistan. You think over here women get half the property. You think over here women don't have to fight for custody.
Plus, I would agree that yes a lot of Pakistani women are being abused. Verbal/ physical abuse is way more common than you think.
First, there are no statistics. Second, even if there are how much abuse do you think ends up being reported.
When it comes to divorce men drag them to courts and take the family and their ex-wives to limits of disrespect.
I haven't closely worked with these women but I have had lots of them as my patients.
And, it has always saddened me to see this situation.
And, as far as commiting suicide is concerned which also points out to them being unstable.
Last but not the least I am not saying that its always the man's fault.
I am just explaining the reasons for the changes in trends.
Come on , I am sure you know in Pakistan men can get away with anything !
I think the real problem is Pakistani girls (from Pakistan or US etc.) have learned to speak up. This is good and bad both, good if she is in an abusive relationship and needs to speak out, bad if she is using this power to get her way. Here is an example, my ex SIL came from Pakistan, and stayed at my house for few days. I work full time (8-5,) pick up my kid from daycare, come home and cook for the family...and take care of the toddler until his sleep time (a typical working mom.) Naturally my husband helps out with house chores. My ex SIL thought it would be great if my brother also helped out. NOW my sil was not working, and didn't have kids. They had fights over this issue, and at the end...by brother was considered a bad guy for not willing to help out (by her parents and sibling...* this was not the reason for the divorce.)
Pakistan girls are getting a lot of support from their family, which is great, but it is also spoiling them. There should be a balance and i think today's parents are NOT teaching/keeping that balance.
The girls are educated, working and have moved way passed the old norm of a house wife...but the guys are not being taught that. Mothers are still babying their sons, and expect the wife to baby them as well...which isn't happening.
When I first looked at your avatar, I was like Damn! Xtron has really changed with raising his kid, cooking food etc etc
As for the situation you describe, I see it happening in the family. One wife sits at home (even off from school these days) but she still sends the kids to daycare. I, for one, wouldn’t tolerate this waste of money not to mention the daycare people are not the parents. I have seen enough abuse videos to know that it shouldn’t be an option when it is avoidable.
