Rape and marriage

Society Religion & Philosophy
1

Is there a such thing as rape within marriage? Or is it that since they’re legally and socially bound, he can do whatever he wants to her (sexually) and she has no right to complain? Coz from what i hear, either paki guys really are sick pigs who have no sensitivity/compassion chip or these grls are bakwaas-ing me :frowning:

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Re: Rape and marriage

again the senseless thoughtless stereotyping. use ''most men r bast*rds''

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Is there a such thing as rape within marriage?
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yes there is

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Or is it that since they're legally and socially bound
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true

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he can do whatever he wants to her (sexually)
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he shouldnt ever but he can

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she has no right to complain?
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who will she complain to?

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Coz from what i hear, either paki guys really are sick pigs
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plz do not stereotype,u may use most,abuse is a universal phenomena,but ok most paki men r just not sensitive but thats wat women complain abt all over the world.

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who have no sensitivity/compassion chip
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extremely erroneous

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these grls are bakwaas-ing me
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they prolly met bast*rds.

personally its a deplorable act,especially considering women have to live with their rapists,very very damaging emotionally n psychologically.

ok assuming men r not capable enuff,why on earth wud a man abuse women n not respect them if their mother,who is aware wat happens to women in society,teach them.its bad parenting generally speaking due to lack of education i wud say.warna i find no reason that a woman who was abused wud not teach her child to respect women n care for them tenderly.

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Re: Rape and marriage

abay o our angelic sara aunty, yes ALL paki guys are sick pigs and ALL paki gals are sick bitches. Additionally, Pakiland is a damned land. ABCD's are the best. Among all the ABCD's, you are the best. How many assurances do you need?

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Re: Rape and marriage

^ :rotfl: :omg:

Nahi yaar. Paki women are angels descended from the 7th heaven. Its only paki guys who are all sons of bitches without exception.

Sara, the route youre taking to get to your 15 minutes of fame and attention will give you your desired results but it’ll just bunch you together with the group of people everyone else here refers to as psychos. You know better than to generalize and especially swear at a whole nation of people based on what you ‘hear’.

What you could have done instead is do a simple google search and share with us the knowledge that you would have gained. Check out this article: rahima.or.id . Scroll down to where it says Considering Islamic Law and read on.

Now if you’re wondering why nothing is done about it in pakistan, well alot isnt done about even bigger problems. Pakistan is selectively islamic.. they keep whatever islamic laws they like and trash the ones they dont. And twist some difficult ones to make life easier for themselves.

Sincerely,
Captain Lota

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Re: Rape and marriage

All sex is rape.
-Andrea Dworkin (sp?)

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Re: Rape and marriage

You can’t force sex on anyone even if you are married to them. There is an ayah in the Quran that explicitly asks men not to force themselves on women. And I’m assuming Allah is talking about women a man is married to rather than hookers. :rolleyes:

By the same token, a woman who is never wanting to have sex needs some therapy. If its a medical problem, her husband should not be raping her. He should help her figure out what is wrong.

And OF COURSE, many pakistani men are missing their sensitivity chips.

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Re: Rape and marriage

PCG could you post that Ayat for reference ?

Jazakallah khair.

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Re: Rape and marriage

Maniac, I've posted the ayah before here. You can take your time out and do the search. I believe its in Surah Nisaa, or nearby the ayahs that discuss who a man can marry. It says something about not forcing yourself against women or not transgressing upon them, etc.

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Re: Rape and marriage

Here you go. I don’t know how many times I have to post these ayahs.

Relevant verses from the Quran:
Sûrah an Nâs 4.119
‘O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will…’

This one talks about sexual behavior with slaves - you can’t force a slave to have sex with you if she doesn’t want to. Just like you can’t force your wife, or any other woman, in fact.

Sûrah an Nûr 24.33
'… And do not, in order to gain some of the fleeting pleasures of this worldly life, coerce your slave women into whoredom if they are desirous of marriage, and if anyone should coerce them, then, verily, after they have been compelled (to submit in their helplessness), God will be much forgiving, a dispenser of grace (to them).

Sara: Check out this link. It has some good proofs against marital rape. It also gives a bit of history on the topic.

http://www.crescentlife.com/articles/islamic%20psych/rape_and_incest_islamic_perspective.htm

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Re: Rape and marriage

Oh and here is another one:

Sûrah al Baqarah 2.223
'Your wives are your tilth; go then unto your tilth as you may desire, but first provide something for your souls*, and remain conscious of God, and know that your are destined to meet Him...'

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Re: Rape and marriage

4:19 is not about sexual behaviour with the wife but it is about inheritance and the ruling on it just like the topic of Surah Nissa which revloves around the surah itself (context.)

24:33 is NOT about relationship with one’s wife… The interpretation to apply and generalize it for a wife is completely wrong.

2:223 also does not stop any act but suggest to do a good deed as well; and prophet:saw: actually taught us a dua for such occassion…

here are the three common translations:

YUSUFALI: Your wives are as a tilth unto you; so approach your tilth when or how ye will; but do some good act for your souls beforehand; and fear Allah. And know that ye are to meet Him (in the Hereafter), and give (these) good tidings to those who believe.
PICKTHAL: Your women are a tilth for you (to cultivate) so go to your tilth as ye will, and send (good deeds) before you for your souls, and fear Allah, and know that ye will (one day) meet Him. Give glad tidings to believers, (O Muhammad).
SHAKIR: Your wives are a tilth for you, so go into your tilth when you like, and do good beforehand for yourselves, and be careful (of your duty) to Allah, and know that you will meet Him, and give good news to the believers.

Islamically, there is no such thing to rape one’s own wife. This is a teminology of those westerners who go and share beds with a different person every night and calling it Freedom but put a restriction of the sacred relationship found only in marriage..

Y mod 19??
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Re: Rape and marriage

Islamically, if I'm not mistaken, the wife is not allowed to refuse sex whenever the man wants it.

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Re: Rape and marriage


:biggthumb

W A N T E D
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Re: Rape and marriage

True but that is called vaginismus that is a different situation altogather
this will be apparent even on the first intercourse
but if she denies sex when she has no medical problems then that is not allowed.....I think

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Re: Rape and marriage

Islamically one has to be very good with ones wife. Sometimes a woman does not want to have sex and it could be due to a number of reasons, therefore a good husband would islamically not force himself upon her.

It also goes the otherway around though that having sex with one's spouse is the right of both husband AND the wife. Therefore neither should be denying it without any good reason.

Lastly, if a woman does not wanna have sex with her husband for prolonged periods of time, perhaps she does not like him or is disgusted by him and what not, then she has all the right to seek kulah and end her marriage.

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Exactly!

Post ur Creative Desks & other collections
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PCG its amazing how u understand (or better say not understand) Quran....

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:k: now we r talking

Should the mother in law be asking
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Re: Rape and marriage

didnt want to mention this coz then its gonna blow up like always but yes, she isnt allowed to refuse if she has got no medical condition.

for pcg :too bad u discredit ahadith"It is a rude manner of a man to proceed to have intercourse with his wife without first playing with her." Or “It is a vice in a man to assault his unprepared wife, seeking to satisfy his own lust and leaving her before she could achieve her own fulfillment…” Imam al-Ghazali in his Ihya’ (vol. 2: 49-50) has mentioned these Ahadith. Most of the scholars of Hadith consider these Ahadith weak (da`if) and we cannot say with surety that they are the statements of the Prophet -peace be upon him, they do, however, contain some wisdom and etiquette that are natural and Islamic.”

The Shari`ah has given us two important principles in this matter. (1) The first principle is that the husband should not deny himself to his wife and the wife also should not deny herself to her husband.(2) The second principle is that in their conjugal relations the couples should be kind and considerate.

if interested in fatwa.

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Re: Rape and marriage

Technically correct, but there is such thing as abuse of one’s wife, and rape is akin to violently assulting her with one’s fist.

Divorce is an option. Forcing oneself on their wife for the sake of humiliation or showing her “her place” (cannonical definitions of maritial rape - note it’s not about sex per sae)…doesn’t sound like a viable option, but rather a one-way ticket to divorceville.

I’d agree with you that a seperate categorization of abuse seems odd…

Also, I thought 2:223 references HOW a man may have sex with his wife (pagans and Jews at the time beleives that only particular positions were allowed), not when… :confused:

http://www.usc.edu/dept/MSA/fundamentals/hadithsunnah/abudawud/011.sat.html#011.2159

*Book 11, Number 2159: *Narrated Abdullah Ibn Abbas:
Ibn Umar misunderstood (the Qur’anic verse, “So come to your tilth however you will”)–may Allah forgive him. The fact is that this clan of the Ansar, who were idolaters, lived in the company of the Jews who were the people of the Book. They (the Ansar) accepted their superiority over themselves in respect of knowledge, and they followed most of their actions. The people of the Book (i.e. the Jews) used to have intercourse with their women on one side alone (i.e. lying on their backs). This was the most concealing position for (the vagina of) the women. This clan of the Ansar adopted this practice from them. But this tribe of the Quraysh used to uncover their women completely, and seek pleasure with them from in front and behind and laying them on their backs.
When the muhajirun (the immigrants) came to Medina, a man married a woman of the Ansar. He began to do the same kind of action with her, but she disliked it, and said to him: We were approached on one side (i.e. lying on the back); do it so, otherwise keep away from me. This matter of theirs spread widely, and it reached the Apostle of Allah (peace_be_upon_him).
So Allah, the Exalted, sent down the Qur’anic verse: “Your wives are a tilth to you, so come to your tilth however you will,” i.e. from in front, from behind or lying on the back. But this verse meant the place of the delivery of the child, i.e. the vagina.

http://www.usc.edu/dept/MSA/fundamentals/hadithsunnah/bukhari/060.sbt.html#006.060.051

*Volume 6, Book 60, Number 51: *[INDENT]
Narrated Jabir:
Jews used to say: “If one has sexual intercourse with his wife from the back, then she will deliver a squint-eyed child.” So this Verse was revealed:–
“Your wives are a tilth unto you; so go to your tilth when or how you will.” (2.223)

[/INDENT]