raising mothers not wives

Arts & Culture Culture, Arts, Literature & Linguistics
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seriously i hear ppl discussing how they should not educate thier daughters b/c guys do not like to arry very educated women!!!

well u know that how we got into the dark ages in the first place! so really women, if the men are too blind to see it! we need to be a society that raises MOTHERS not wives!

YES! the daughters of today will be the MOTHERS of tommorow, so raise them to be our future generations mothers - not just wives who blindly cater to the men!

Like i said in some previous post …i think… :frowning: that we need balance! we need both men and women to be equal partners in deciding the fate of our future generations. when u have one more then the other, that when things go awry! its like ing and yang you need both - both are equally important! its like night and day!!! again need both!!! so this patriarchal society of ours where men rule…obviously not working! so lets toss it out women!!

lets take back what is rightly ours! our claim to this throne! thats right i am as much an integral part of this society then any man!!!

thus women need to be educated! b/c like i said! raising MOTHERS not wives!

thoughts ppl?:smiley:

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Re: raising mothers not wives

raising moms, such that they are stronger in support, when their children look up to them for advice and encouragement. education has alot of bearing on any mind, especially that of a Mom who truly recognizes the potential for her off spring.
if women are given the chance to become educated, they can indeed change the fate of their children - simply by their own example of fairness and balance, authoritativeness and friendliness, otherwise, uneducated women as parents will relive what they have been put through - the ever churning machine of self sacrifice - that leads to further no education of the next generation, absence of respect for women kind, and countless social injustices that eventually fail those males, who subservient mothers are trained to protect.

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farwah you go girl !!! :D its good to c more liberal, sane and sensible muslim women on here.. to balance women like hareem...

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You seems to be mixing up two different topics

Firstly you can not find an illiterate girl in normal social circles of pakistan, It is either those who are too poor or those areas which are too backward...

So to Not educate girls is NOT an option. Most probably you are trying to say that people discourage their daughter from acquiring higher education ( i.e Masters , doctrate etc) again ... this does not mean that basic education is a waste.

Graduation is good enough education for future mothers. Higher education is a luxury and an uphill task. Everyone is not required to pursue higher education anywhere in the world.

Rest of your sermon sounds redundant. No one disagrees with the importance of education for girls. Those who do, might not be reading this because they cant read themselve.

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your method of debating is silly. you always use abusive words for me, you wont get any thing out of it. everytime with these sort of comments you show your pride and ignorance.
May Allah show you guidance one day.

What do you wear?
What do you wear?
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Re: raising mothers not wives

men, are afraid of self reliant women. they cannot handle control of their moms and wives.
and to balance it all - to square away the over reactions, the intimidations and the heart aches, the best thing is to make space - for others and for oneself.
i have learnt that if i say something, that remotely elucidates a doubt - in the mind of someone, s/he is going to gravitate towards the suspect in me, and not that part of me, who simply was clarifying why standing for the justice is crucial.
raising good wives will be a 360 degree fair thing if we are also focusing on raising good husbands.
if they are not cooperative, respectful, and honest, in dealing fairly with their wives, then no matter how educated or self sufficient their wives are and well meaning to the relationship - marriages wont work, as men will always re evaluate whether they are 'superior' than women or not, so that they can c l a i m their superiority over cooperative, caring, compassionate, but self reliant assertive women.
for such men, they first need to re configure their mental expectation of women
and for women, they must determine that men are no self centered, clever and calculative and that they actually have a strong personal commitment towards the mutual relationship.

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As Napolean said give me an educated mother and i will give you an educated nation

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Just when in another topic I found your way of discussion to be sensable , you came up with a comment like this. My humble request is to kindly refrain from such offensive comments, even in a joke, specially when you know that the person's feelings might be hurt by your words.

p.s. Ofcourse it is ok when you have understanding with the person regarding whom you give comments, but that certainly doesn't seem to be the case here.

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Farwa i guess code red is right ........... people who think their daughters shouldn't be educated , atleast get them to do high school / intermediate before arranging their marriage , which i think is sufficient to raise children and run a household properly as a housewife for the rest of life .................... on the other hand woman who're highly qualified and ambitious and wanna excel , derserves to get married to "only" such broad minded men who wouldn't object them or interfare with their plans , thus give them liberty to persue their career while running a household and raising kids.

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women have a right to education, regardless, and it does make a positive difference in their ability to be better individuals and Mothers.

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Moms' education & ability to be good Moms

it is no surprise that a lot of times, women are the ones who together with confused men, ruin a sacred commitment and cause injustice, because of being less educated or uneducated.

education enables people to be impartial, to be brave and to be truthful at the same time,
but in education leave people in the pit of doubts, prejudgments and lack of awareness of their own rights as well as obligations.

our own Quran says - IQRA.
how can you denounce this, merely to keep women behind in earning?

the ultimate damage of such mind set leads to a destroyed non compatible life of no other, but the next generation as it will still be clinging on to the doubts and prejudgments and notions of no motion, will be cyclic - the inertia of fearful, will always hamper its ability to let happiness come about, to experience life, in its purity and to belong to a pride worthy back ground.
education can ONLY make the right difference in the life of the right person, when enduring individuals - male or female, who are confident of their own selves and mean what they say no matter what happens.

education compels towards an even greater courageous thing to do, in those people - females or males, who learn from their mistakes from before and not let doubts reside and fail their trust in a given individual or plan that they found/ find affinity with.

distribution of labor at home, or balancing work life schedules is do able in case of truly committed people.

to be honest with you, and rather harsh - uneducated women, in many instances, are also the ones who knowingly or unknowingly hold on and possess what they give life to. because, without them, they have no reason to be.

their personal self hood is (as honorable as it is as being Moms), is still very limited to revolving around the lives of their off spring.

nor do they live a happy life, nor they let their children live happy lives because they do not want to lose them.

education does correlate with better motherhood , it is a right & a reasonable thing to attain for any woman.

another effect is, uneducated Mothers will force their lack of knowledge on their children and the society as a consequence.

in this subsequence, another generation grows out of bitterness and remains fraught with resentment and drags itself and its parents. no one is happy, everyone is selfish and at the mercy of their created personal wedges & utterly destroys any peace in anyone's life. is that what is desired? does it help?

any views?

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actually code-red this post was aimed at people like you! who can it fact, it apears at least - read! don’t patronize us with “graduation is good enough for future mothers”!!! are u a future a mother, or a mother presently!!! then truly speaking unless u have a phd in sociology and women psyche, you dont get to decide what is “good enough” education for women!

The point of this post, which seems to have been obvioulsy lost on you! was quite simply that women are very actively, in our soceity, discouraged from pursuing higher (i.e. graduate school: masters, phd, J.D. etc) type education b/c parents fear it might render them unmarriageable! but when what we aspire to be is a society of well educated people, lawyers, doctors, psychologists, whatever… then we need to not curb half of our population from pursuing such education, pursuing such knowledge.

Like i said we need balance, we need the ying and yang to be balanced! We cant have the yang better educated and dominating our society b/c then we will not be a healthy society! we need our ying to be just as educated, just as powerful!

So really get out of our way…or we will run you over!! MAN! :naraz:

hihihi:D

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Hsap! do u even realize how patronizing and backwards your "i think is sufficient to raise children and run a household properly as a housewife for the rest of life" sounds!!!

I cant respond! I just can't!!!!!

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Iraj! right on!!!!

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with my simple post i referred to mainstream women in Pakistan , who barely get basic education/ high school/ intermediate either by choice -or- cuzz of family pressure , but after getting married prefer to stay-at-home mom / housewife no matter how many options they have ....................... and sorry to say have seen the same among pakistani families abroad as well , it's no how i think , it's how things r , my point is clear , don't know what offends u

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^^^ that's right and i agree with it 100% , but whenever u see a woman not highly educated , not working / career oriented and stay-at-home mom it's not always her parents or family's fault or something imposed on her , there're woman everywhere who do it by choice , and in doing so + running household + raising kids, still giving their best to the society .......... i take such woman in high regard too.

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righto, women do it by choice too , u can't blame anyone for that

unique id
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farwa , there're such narrow minded families who think that way , but the girls/ woman from such families need to rise and fight for their rights, no one could do anything for them , they need to make a diffrence by themselves

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Who is telling girls not to get educated? Most people posting on this forum come from families where girls are getting educated. Its the people living in villages and slums in Pakistan that you need to speak to.

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What is the bloodly obsession with education...im doing a degree at a top uni so i can earn some top cash...am i learning anything...nothing i couldnt have learnt by reading a book...education is a certificate...its no indication of life skills or your ability to do anything...i go to an upper class uni and ui shudder to think what kind of mothers these spoonfed women will become...the girls who got D's at college had life skills and were significantly more intelligent than most people i meet at uni...

Being an academic doesnt mean your intelligent...it just means you want to work...Educations a sham...girls want one not to learn but cos they want to earn like us guys do...