Re: Question for Pakistanis living abroad
True again!
So should we as Pakistani individuals just watch the show. Is there nothing we can do to improve the situation?
Re: Question for Pakistanis living abroad
It all comes down to how children are raised yeah? Parents instill values in their children and also bestow tenets of religion.
Life abroad cannot really be compared to life in Pak so adjustments should be made - adjustments that allow one to "fit in" without compromising values. For instance, the hijabi in Pak who moves to the west would stand out and actually attract more notice to herself than one who wore a scarf on her head and modest western clothing. There will be many cases of parties where alcohol is served and I really think its ok to attend but consume juice or soft drinks instead of alcohol. Rather than avoid all parties and functions altogether yeah? ANyway, the point is that any Pakistani can fit in very nicely without compromising their values. I think troubles happen when there is a very stringent and unbending set of rules to follow in Pak then being set on the loose in the west, kwim? People who are raised to adhere to their values but are also allowed to make adjustments according to local culture and practice seem to fare better without sucumbing to temptations.
Re: Question for Pakistanis living abroad
agree, and there is lot more happening in Pakistan.
this question in fact should be asked to their parent...not to them!
Re: Question for Pakistanis living abroad
Honestly to everyone saying how pure and innocent life in Pakistan is and comparing people living in pakistan and in other countries you gotta go to Youtube and search for videos made in pakistan of pakistani people living there.
It'll put shame to even the most outgoing desi living abroad.
thats right, you are not aware of anything so stop generalizing and please enough with racial mud slinging. 
Hey!
**Before i start the topic id like to say that this topic isn't directed towards some one specifically and i would prefer that this be kept as a healthy discussion and no personal attacking and harsh wordings please. **
Recently, lets say in the last 4-5 years i have seen so many Pakistanis living abroad, born there, migrated there, or on study purposes have truly changed them selves completely. It is good to change with the environment but now girls hardly wear anything. Seriously, lots of my own class fellows & batch mates study there and wear such deep-neck shirts, very small length tops, mini skirts, strapless blouses etc. you all know what i mean. In every other picture, Pakistani boys and girls are seen posing for a photograph sticking to opposite gender people of other countries. I know they are just friends but aren't we Muslims? and also Pakistanis? This is really not our culture. I am not a narrow minded person and i also have friends but i think there should be a limit. Going to dance clubs and exposing so much of skin and hugging, kissing, drinking, fooling around etc people of other genders just in the name of 'friendship' that isn't wise.
I know many of you will say we don't do it and people we know don't do it. But the fact is that no matter how much anyone denies it, this thing is prevailing so much and is progressing so much day after day. Why have Pakistanis abroad totally forgotten their roots all of a sudden? I know here in Pakistan people are like this too but right now i am just focusing on Pakistanis abroad, there have been lots of discussions already on Pakistanis living in Pakistan being westernized. People in Pakistan have westernized but there is still a large majority that is still sticking to their roots.
Everyone should adapt to their environments, westernization and modernization but within limits. Wear jeans and skirts etc everything but at least we should be fully covered and some distance should be maintained with the other gender. Hanna? This isn't our culture or our religion, neither am i conservative person but to adopt so much to some one else's culture that you totally forget your own roots isn't right at all. What do you think?
just a question wat are ur roots? no one in pakistan is actually a muslim the whole pakistani culture is tottaly inspired by indians im not saying there is anything wrong with it but on the whole pakistani culture is alot of people different background cuming together.n one thing i dont understand if u have aproblem with them go n tell them try making them understand.y are u discussing them like this, this wuld be gossip.batteen bannaay kyon beth jatay hain log. y dont do sumthing about it.plz stop bringing each other down.help each other
lol.
situation is not like that in australia. its worse in a different way! if a girl goes shopping wearing jeans....we are talking jeans ..... all the house wifes will know this and the whole community will errupt. heck, i still remember when 2 families collided full on when a one lady said she saw a girl wearing jeans at 9: pm on thursday night.
shocked
cuz gals back home (even of my pind) wear jeans.
lol...honestly i dont know whats so wrong about wearing jeans. well might be tight one is not really a decent wear, but jeans is simply a kapra.
i personally believe you should talk to those aunties and try to figure out make them think that way. i believe that you are an educated personal and education solves many problem.
otherwise, we should follow the demands of that society... as it is not good to go anywhere in pakistan without having a duppatta on head...
Islam or pakistani honay ka taluk to dill say hai....zahir say thori hai!
otherwise wearing western clothes we can be modest, and wearing chooti chooti shalwar kameez we can we vulgar.
Hey!
**Before i start the topic id like to say that this topic isn't directed towards some one specifically and i would prefer that this be kept as a healthy discussion and no personal attacking and harsh wordings please. **
Recently, lets say in the last 4-5 years i have seen so many Pakistanis living abroad, born there, migrated there, or on study purposes have truly changed them selves completely. It is good to change with the environment but now girls hardly wear anything. Seriously, lots of my own class fellows & batch mates study there and wear such deep-neck shirts, very small length tops, mini skirts, strapless blouses etc. you all know what i mean. In every other picture, Pakistani boys and girls are seen posing for a photograph sticking to opposite gender people of other countries. I know they are just friends but aren't we Muslims? and also Pakistanis? This is really not our culture. I am not a narrow minded person and i also have friends but i think there should be a limit. Going to dance clubs and exposing so much of skin and hugging, kissing, drinking, fooling around etc people of other genders just in the name of 'friendship' that isn't wise.
I know many of you will say we don't do it and people we know don't do it. But the fact is that no matter how much anyone denies it, this thing is prevailing so much and is progressing so much day after day. Why have Pakistanis abroad totally forgotten their roots all of a sudden? I know here in Pakistan people are like this too but right now i am just focusing on Pakistanis abroad, there have been lots of discussions already on Pakistanis living in Pakistan being westernized. People in Pakistan have westernized but there is still a large majority that is still sticking to their roots.
Everyone should adapt to their environments, westernization and modernization but within limits. Wear jeans and skirts etc everything but at least we should be fully covered and some distance should be maintained with the other gender. Hanna? This isn't our culture or our religion, neither am i conservative person but to adopt so much to some one else's culture that you totally forget your own roots isn't right at all. What do you think?
It depends on the person. If you are going to change, you will change without moving abroad, within your own environment. You may not show it but you will change if you want to. I have seen people who have become more religious by moving to a western culture.
It all comes down to how children are raised yeah? Parents instill values in their children and also bestow tenets of religion.
Life abroad cannot really be compared to life in Pak so adjustments should be made - adjustments that allow one to "fit in" without compromising values. For instance, the hijabi in Pak who moves to the west would stand out and actually attract more notice to herself than one who wore a scarf on her head and modest western clothing. There will be many cases of parties where alcohol is served and I really think its ok to attend but consume juice or soft drinks instead of alcohol. Rather than avoid all parties and functions altogether yeah? ANyway, the point is that any Pakistani can fit in very nicely without compromising their values. I think troubles happen when there is a very stringent and unbending set of rules to follow in Pak then being set on the loose in the west, kwim? People who are raised to adhere to their values but are also allowed to make adjustments according to local culture and practice seem to fare better without sucumbing to temptations.
Where alcohol is served we can't attend regardless of whether that party provides soft drinks or fruit juice.
Hey!
**Before i start the topic id like to say that this topic isn't directed towards some one specifically and i would prefer that this be kept as a healthy discussion and no personal attacking and harsh wordings please. **
Recently, lets say in the last 4-5 years i have seen so many Pakistanis living abroad, born there, migrated there, or on study purposes have truly changed them selves completely. It is good to change with the environment but now girls hardly wear anything. Seriously, lots of my own class fellows & batch mates study there and wear such deep-neck shirts, very small length tops, mini skirts, strapless blouses etc. you all know what i mean. In every other picture, Pakistani boys and girls are seen posing for a photograph sticking to opposite gender people of other countries. I know they are just friends but aren't we Muslims? and also Pakistanis? This is really not our culture. I am not a narrow minded person and i also have friends but i think there should be a limit. Going to dance clubs and exposing so much of skin and hugging, kissing, drinking, fooling around etc people of other genders just in the name of 'friendship' that isn't wise.
I know many of you will say we don't do it and people we know don't do it. But the fact is that no matter how much anyone denies it, this thing is prevailing so much and is progressing so much day after day. Why have Pakistanis abroad totally forgotten their roots all of a sudden? I know here in Pakistan people are like this too but right now i am just focusing on Pakistanis abroad, there have been lots of discussions already on Pakistanis living in Pakistan being westernized. People in Pakistan have westernized but there is still a large majority that is still sticking to their roots.
Everyone should adapt to their environments, westernization and modernization but within limits. Wear jeans and skirts etc everything but at least we should be fully covered and some distance should be maintained with the other gender. Hanna? This isn't our culture or our religion, neither am i conservative person but to adopt so much to some one else's culture that you totally forget your own roots isn't right at all. What do you think?
leave us alone.
……Interestingly it is true that Pakistan might have more than 99% muslim population but are they muslims by choice or by birth?
Being born in muslim family gives us the right to cal ourselves muslims but as the question re actual following the tenets and path of Islam is key…………Pakistan’s population has and had strong cultural bonding with the culture of India in present and also in the past….for centuries people who inhabit Pakistan’s land (geographically) were living with hindus in Sub-Continent…and Islam flourished in this area due to saints and Sufis….. it did not flourish the way it spread in Arab world.
Now, having said that…the cultural taboos and values differ vastly from family to family even in Pakistan……it definitely is a country which is completely Class Ridden & Driven……Pakistan itself does not have very rich culture/heritage dating back to centuries…it is just six decades or almost 7 decades old.
I still remember that my aunt wanted to marry off her daughter but did not like any proposals so my uncle asked her…..why are you rejecting everybody…..and she went on to tell some reasons like…..woh sharaab peita hai….and etc etc…. and kissi ki family itni well reputed nahin hai…..(good/well connected family is used in typical terms….and it might be different for everybody on forum, but here the meaning is that they should be wealthy, well connected and have good reputation as per Pakistan’s standards)…etc etc…….so my uncle asked her…in nutshell how do you want our daughters inlaws to be…….she responded….nice “khandani family”, well reputed and connected and sharif…….the answer of my uncle stunned everybody in the living room…..he was like…..ya tou sharif loag dhoodn lo…ya well reputed and connected….because aaj kal supposedly her “achi family” key larkey drink bhi kartey hain waghera waghera…… but he added that there are still nice families with the type of traitsthat you are looking for….but in absolute monority…so the chances are if you want good family…..(good/well connected family is used in typical terms….and it might be different for everybody on forum, but here the meaning is that they should be wealthy, well connected and have good reputation as per Pakistan’s standards)
So, whether we agree to the fact or not, but it is true that most Khandani families toe to the lines of western culture…and when we say western culture we mean something bad…… but on the flip side…..I have my another cousin who has married an very well reputed family in US…he is an American and catholic too but belongs to a billionaire family…… he has some traits which we all get excited about so much that upon first chance we tell every body that he does not drink…..he does not womanize, he does not do anything which can be termed going against Hakook-ul-Ibaad….. so the question to ask is…do we want to still admonish him because he is not muslim… and still prefer those people who are muslims because they are born in muslim family in Pakistan and have all the evils that any typical non-muslim has……
I for myself, has seen both parts…I was 16 when I moved to US…..and have spent almost three years over here, being westernized I have been subjected to preconceived ideas about myself by typical desi mentality aunties, but do I care…..NO…..why…it is a long debate and needs more time…
But in Pakistan…I know many of my classmates/college mates who used to do drink, do every sin, but in front of parents and family would put up as if they are symbol of mashraki larki……I think as nation….we have gotten too confused as to exactly what is our identity….our cultural and heritage bonding is not strong enough to have attracted and kept our generation and a lot of class ridden things coupled with hypocrisy is not helping us move towards typical Pakistani culture.
With globalization, everything has changed a lot and will change further….and as to your question how can we do something to stop younger generation becoming besharam by certain standards….it is something which has to do with identity of our nation as well……as I have said earlier in my long and boring post that people in Pakistan will definitely get confused as to be successful you need to be in that “IN circle” who will be graduating from Aitchison College, Lahore American School, Lahore Grammar and many others…… and with that fierce competition in professional life you need to be well connected…..so in order to be well connected most of the times you have to toe to the line which is being followed by well connected….and if your family does not agree with it…you will have split personality topped with hypocritical values and traits…..
In short…parents role is to tell each child right and wrong path…and to walk on it…..is the challenge that each child has to face…,,it’s the childs decision which path to follow…..if strictness/and by force following certain paths worked well…then there cannot be no wrong in that society…..but as we can see that no society is perfect…and our society’s fabric is more vulnerable to being damaged because…..we come from various backgrounds….and put together as nation which now has very little tolerance for anything that is different than what self proclaimed leaders think should be………
leave us alone.
Lolz... I love this answer...haha
Re: Question for Pakistanis living abroad
^^ I miss you babes :(
Where alcohol is served we can't attend regardless of whether that party provides soft drinks or fruit juice.
It is not possible to live here like normal human beings and avoid the people, gathering or places that serve or sell alcohol.
Why have Pakistanis abroad totally forgotten their roots all of a sudden?
define roots?
It is not possible to live here like normal human beings and avoid the people, gathering or places that serve or sell alcohol.
I know! Even halal restaurants here have Bar's.
y do pkstns focsu so much on 'haya' and 'ghairaat' and less on being a morally good person? they read namaz, cover thsmelvs,talk piltley in fornt of u mind u but hten behind ur backs htese same namazi good muslim type of ppl r the same ones who backbite like anything, torture the new bahu who comes in2 the family like anything(even the guyz extended family does this like his khalas nd cousins n stuff, even his own sister)..theyll make a mountain out of a molehill on same mistakes she does with her husband/fiance or whtvr and convince him in secret(never in front of her, in fornt her theyr quiet) that she is soo faulty nd she s bad 4 his fmly nd doesnt care bout them or him. . nd having all that bs in his head he will and does indeed start acting stupid adn obnoxious.
these haya wale log r the same who get soooo jelaous of their own bardari wale when htey go out nd make a life 4 thsemlves, bcm fincly sucesfl..instead of being happy with them..theser r same ppl who r sooo greedy that htey actaully have the audactiy 2 get pissed off at hteir relatives when they bcm paise wale nd they dont od risthas with htier kidz..they r like aap log itne selfish ho..aap logons ko koi khayla neh heh hamara..nd..hamrari bhi to zimdaarian heh. these r the same ppl who wouldnt consider that family ristha material if they were poor like b4.
these r the same ppl who if u do soemthing 4 them, instd ke yeh aap ka ahsaan manke aap ke saat seede rehe..yehi log baad meh ap hi ke moo par chutians marte heh yeh kekhke keh 'aap logons neh kia kiya heh hamrre liye' they abuse htem 2 no end nd bcm they r WORST enemies nd htey spare no chance at making ur life nad ur own family's life hell. i guess they do these things bcs what u do is not enough.
so when all these other problems r there..then y r u focusing on this 'where r our kidz ogin theyr gonna go 2 hell!" these r kidz, tyoung and immature..so i can sorta undrstd theyr confusion in doing htese things BUT
the above mentioned acts r done by our pakistani ELDERS..yes the same ones who talk about religion, and modesty nad sharam and haya..yes those same HYPOCRITES!
at least the besharam kidz in north america nad uk r straight forward and not hypocrites. they do everythign 2 in open and at least theyr not ruining anyone elses's lives..they r magan in their own world..at least they r not khatarnak like the children in paksitan who say onehting and od another..who r sooo extremely 2 faced that i cannot beleive. yes i said khatarnaak bcs i personlaly know the native pkstnis's stories nd the ppl who do the most trickeiest chlaak nad cunning htings with hteir own familes, thei rown cousins, their own in laws, their own nands..
nd kidsz here in north america and uk DONOT do chalak nd tricky stuff 2 ruin other ppl's lives..if they r doing anything bad its with hteir own lives.
u r telling me that ppl born riased n living n paksitan have values?? yeah 2faced values u mean..values my foot! nd they sure as hell dont have an y morals!!!
lets's priroritize our concerns here..there r bigger probs then confused desi kiddies wearing western clothes nd gogin clubbing. lets worry about the problems that arise 4rom our country itself 1st and later worry about teh problems the west has given our paksitanis.
Re: Question for Pakistanis living abroad
so basically ur all hot and bothered b/c of what girls wear?
Where alcohol is served we can't attend regardless .
even on flights? :)