do you think its wrong if a girl proposes to a guy?
Re: Proposals
wudnt be wrong, just be unusual maybe 
Re: Proposals
yeah thats what i meant you know if u were a girl would you do it?
Re: Proposals
yeah thats what i meant you know if u were a girl would you do it?
N E V E R!
its not the norms of our culture, however, there is nothing wrong with it form an Islamic POV, so if someone did, I would never think bad of it, just a bit unusual.
2 Likes
Re: Proposals
hmm what if your friend did it, would you be angry with her?
thats what my friend did:bummer:
Re: Proposals
like i mentioned above, if something is ok in Islam, then it shouldn’t be an issue at all… as far as getting anrgy… i cant imagine why there is such a need… unless there r other reasons involved apart from committing a cultural sin.
Re: Proposals
hmm there could be other reasons involved like the guy is my cousin.
Re: Proposals
hahaha... acha... so he's your cousin. Are you afraid that this will make things wierd b/w you and your cousin/friend if things dont work out the way your friend wants them to?
Re: Proposals
duh! and its weird that a close friend of mine would out of the blue propose to my cousin who is as dumb struck as i am! and usually our is a conservative family we dont have love marriages we have only arranged marriages between cousins:( so i dunno what will happen
Re: Proposals
^ well considering she is a close friend of yours, she shouldv'e known better! i mean she ought to know that u guys are into arrange marriages so it is quite silly of her to have tried otherwise... cant predict the future, but she's started all this on the wrong foot...
Re: Proposals
i know thats what i was thinking that what was she thinking why did she do such a thing, i know she asked me couple of times before about my cousin but i told her that we have arranged marriages etc but she still did it!:( i know she did start this on the wrong foot and thats why i am angry with her! she has ruined everything!
Re: Proposals
I believe in taking things in your hands.
And to be honest, guys like the girls to take the first step once in a while.
Re: Proposals
really!
Re: Proposals
no it is not wrong if a woman proposes a man.
but, these things are so reletive to the educated ness and open minded ness of a people, a society that unless your probable match is to your liking and you to his, and both of you have developed an unbreakable bond, then proposing can come from both at the same time, or one might simply be waiting for a noble reproposal by the other.
first thing first - making sure that everything you do is sincere to the other person and then it is his perceptiveness that he picks the lead.
both must not mistrust each other by being neutral or by being inactive.
lost time does not come back and if it comes, it better be twice compassionate and sensitive.
from Islamic point of view, there is no law written in Quran and in Prophet's words that woman may not take initiative in proposing a given man - his own example - he was much younger than Khadija, he had been empoyed by her and she proposed him because of his good nature.
there are nice transparent ways in which both genders can and gracefully approach each other.
of course it is up to the understanding of both, how to handle a sign of reciprocity and thinking phase or a delay or worse - a proposal and then its abrupt revocation. no two people - a woman and a man, a young boy or a girl, should have to ever feel as if they are unable to be with someone, because the other person is unable to make room and really recognize true regard.
it does not matter who bespeaks of that and actually discloses that regard first or last or again..
Dushwari
Re: Proposals
i know thats what i was thinking that what was she thinking why did she do such a thing, i know she asked me couple of times before about my cousin but i told her that we have arranged marriages etc but she still did it!:( i know she did start this on the wrong foot and thats why i am angry with her! she has ruined everything!
you shouldn't be angry with her- if she's your friend, you should try and support her at the very least. if anything, she might have ruined things for herself, but how does it ruin things for you? it might not have been done before in your family, but change happens and theres a first time for everything. and if she's a nice enough girl, then who cares? it might just be a good match between the two of them.
maybe because you said it was arranged marriages in your family only, she proposed to your cousin so he could say yes to her, and then he could formally propose to her family (since (as far as i know) girls families don't propose in pakistani culture, its always the boys who bring the proposals).
have the parents gotten involved yet?
Re: Proposals
It depend on situations really! If it's what she really wants then I'm all for it
Re: Proposals
Poor gal, she just shot herself in the foot.
Let her try her luck.
Re: Proposals
no parents are not involved yet, the guy is asking me for advice and the girl is asking me for advice its all messed up
Re: Proposals
There's nothing wrong with it.
This issue isn't really about the fact that the girl proposed, but that she didn't inform or consult you, right?
Re: Proposals
well i think that if a girl propose nd imagine the boy agrees his family agrees they got married than in some circumstances she will have to listen from that man that u proposed me u were the first to take the step not i..........and so on
u know na how stupid these boys r
so should wait for the guy to propose u
and aisha if ur cousin wants some advise from u then u can say him that he should tell ur friend that there is some kind of arrange marriage system in ur familyy.he should tell 2 his parents about her n then if his parents r agreed then there can happen something or else she has to forget her