little toddler has anger management issues…constantly fights with other kids, bites them, breaks anything you give him. (parents say that he is just attention seeking, will grow out of it and write it off)
toddler starts school…is okay for the early years but progressively becomes an academic slacker…grades suffer…gets in trouble at school. (parents say that he is too active to sit still and pay attention and write it off)
this kid grows up to be a young adult that slacks in college…skips and fails classes…keeps switching majors…finds excuses for his failures. (parents say that he is not cut out for a professional job and it doesn’t matter anyway because we have money and will start a business for him.)
this young adult who now “owns” a business shows up late for work every morning…abuses the privileges he has as owner…spends money like there is no tomorrow…doesn’t give attention where due. (parents say he’s young and these are the days for him to enjoy life and that it will all be okay once he is married and has some responsibility on his shoulders…)
he gets married, treats the wife like ****, has a few kids, doesnt give them much attention, neglects them. parents say he's just adjusting to married and family life, its difficult, he needs time to get used to his new responsibilites yadda yadda.
little toddler has anger management issues.....constantly fights with other kids, bites them, breaks anything you give him. (parents say that he is just attention seeking, will grow out of it and write it off)
toddler starts school....is okay for the early years but progressively becomes an academic slacker....grades suffer.....gets in trouble at school. (parents say that he is too active to sit still and pay attention and write it off)
this kid grows up to be a young adult that slacks in college....skips and fails classes....keeps switching majors.....finds excuses for his failures. (parents say that he is not cut out for a professional job and it doesn't matter anyway because we have money and will start a business for him.)
this young adult who now "owns" a business shows up late for work every morning.....abuses the privileges he has as owner.....spends money like there is no tomorrow......doesn't give attention where due. (parents say he's young and these are the days for him to enjoy life and that it will all be okay once he is married and has some responsibility on his shoulders........)
Guess what comes next.....
He gets married, treats the wife like trash, and the parents blame it on her
Sadly, I know a guy like this. He had every opportunity, every toy, grew up with a silver spoon in his mouth so to speak. His dad owned a very successful business but sonny boy wasnt interested so mommy and daddy funded him an amazing overseas photography expedition which actually turned out to be a a9-month blast of a party for sonny-boy who got (surprise surprise) rejection letters from every news/photo journal he submitted his pathetic pictures to. He's now in his early 50s but looks to be about 80. Never married, very unhappy. Unemployed as he has been for the majority of his life. As far as happiness, I dont think he is capable of it and I sincerely doubt he's ever experienced it. Very sad to be sure.
I love my boys and so want to give them every little thing that their little hearts desire. But I know how bad that would be to do. I want to shield them from every little hurt that life hurls at them but also know that in order to truly feel happiness they must know what true sadness is. being a parent is so very tough. but you gotta suck-it-up and let them learn so they can grow.
little toddler has anger management issues.....constantly fights with other kids, bites them, breaks anything you give him. (parents say that he is just attention seeking, will grow out of it and write it off)
toddler starts school....is okay for the early years but progressively becomes an academic slacker....grades suffer.....gets in trouble at school. (parents say that he is too active to sit still and pay attention and write it off)
this kid grows up to be a young adult that slacks in college....skips and fails classes....keeps switching majors.....finds excuses for his failures. (parents say that he is not cut out for a professional job and it doesn't matter anyway because we have money and will start a business for him.)
this young adult who now "owns" a business shows up late for work every morning.....abuses the privileges he has as owner.....spends money like there is no tomorrow......doesn't give attention where due. (parents say he's young and these are the days for him to enjoy life and** that it will all be okay once he is married and has some responsibility on his shoulders**........)
Guess what comes next.....
His parents find him a girl to get married to? Or he himself found a girl and wants to get married? And either the rishta search has begun....or the engagement has taken the place and the wedding is in the works.......or the marriage has already take place and the guy is STILL a man-child. OR WORSE....the guy has a child of his own....and the child is more mature than than HIM!
Bottom line is ----Although he is married now.... but in reality guy is nt ready for the responsibilities of marriage ... u knw very wel tht shaadi is nt a munna munnni game .... :p
To be honest, I think 75% of such guys do straighten out after marriage. 25% end up as perpetual losers.
A lot of guys in Pakistan, who grow up as spoiled brats, go into their teens in the same way.....smoke cigarettes, drink beer, alcohol, womanize, race around in their dad's cars, flunk in college, but pay their way to passing grades.
And when they get into practical life, their transformation begins for the better. And once they get married, their transformation is so complete that none of their college friends can imagine that THIS guy can hold down a job and raise a family!
Whether the transformation is because of age, or because of marriage (and its associated responsibilities), or because of social and cultural factors, fact is, people in Pakistan rely a lot on these factors to help 'fix' their errant kids. Almost every parent that you talk to, who has a spoiled brat for a son, will offer similar solutions (shadi ho gi to theek ho jaye ga)(job shuroo karay ga to theek ho jaye ga). And sadly enough, they are right. It works most of the time.
I know this guy. His parents took him back home to get married (obv forced, emotional blackmail) but his wife, omg his wife straightened him out like there's no tomorrow! He now runs his own business, has a beautiful family and most of all is mazbi and respects his parents! So sometimes, there IS light at the end of the tunnel.
