Re: Post marriage independence, privacy or abandoning your parents?
firstly, whenever i have seen kids getting married, usually their parents arent bed-ridden. they are still fairly young and healthy. most times there isnt even a conversation of them living together.
my FIL lives an hour away from us close to his work. we live close to our work.. so it would be retarded to get a house in the middle to live together because it would be inconvenient for both parties. secondly, my FIL himself has said that a couple needs to live alone atleast initially to get to understand each other and not have any issues from people outside. third, forget about living close to us, my FIL wants to move to a state down south, hundreds of miles away from us in a couple of yrs.
so pretty much everyones situation is different. my FIL is pretty healthy and it hasnt even been a year since we have been married so yeh, if we had to live with ANYONE i would be upset (unless the elderly was sick). i do want for us to live alone/ independently etc for a few years before we have any responsibilities. we dont even want kids yet so why would we want to live with our parents?
and if u dont understand where a woman is comign from when she says she doesnt wanna live with others (i mean parents and inlaws alike) specially when the elders are healthy as a horse then i feel bad for ur wife. let me tell u why i feel this way.
- i wake up when i want to.
- i make food whenever i want to.
- if i dont want to cook, i go out or order out.
- i eat whatever i want to without other people saying anything about it.
- i wear whatever i want to
- i do whatever i want to, whenever i want to
- i make my own schedule, ill study when i want to, ill play games, ill go out with my friends when i want to, without having to tell anyone my schedule
- if my place is messy, no one is gonna try to yell at me to clean it.
- if the dishes are left in the sink cuz im feeling lazy and will clean them tomorrow, no one is gonna think that i left it for them to clean
- just because i didnt make food doesnt mean i hate someone and want them to starve or want them to cook for themselves or for me
the list could go on. yes there are a lot of misunderstandings specially in the beginning.
if however my parents or my FIL were sick, i wouldnt have a problem having them live with me.