Like for example, this thread. I have yet to see people acknowledge that you can talk to someone of the opposite sex outside the work environment, outside a romantic or sexual relationship, and it be totally harmless.
Either its "I talk to the opposite sex and nowhere else", or "don't talk to anyone of the opposite sex at all".
What the heck do some of you do? Not even crack a smile at someone you're going to school with or work with?
You can't really do much about it, can you.
Personally, i do not talk to Desi girls unless i have to, even on the workplace. Coz some of them are the type that even if u talk to them more than once in the whole day (at work place), they think one is flirting. I have found it much easier to have a professional relationship with non-desi girls.
I guess the best thing is to ignorethese people. Next time u see such a desi girl, u can tell her to her man in her lap.
And as Ummah we were never supposed to have a segregated system.
Says who ? Sorry ma’am it is looked down in our culture and religion, Jawan larka larki McDonalds main bethey hon tu wo date hoti hai, currency devaluation pe discussion nahi
I dont know what kind of suffocating envirment you work in, Or maybe its your personality which is … ahem repelling.
Echoes Iconoclast’s sentiments.
Dont know how the people (desi) behave in your part of the world. But here mostly the work envirnment is atleast friendly if not cordial between men and women. I dont see people shying away from female colleagues, but they limit it to Need-to-talk basis mostly.
Never had an experience with non-desi female colleagues. But all of the girl colleagues were exceptionally friendly and very nice girls. We used to have lively chit chat and eat and had fun together … Never heard any male colleague seeing taking this friendlyness in any negative meaning.
waisay ek taraf tu desi larkiyan aankh bhar ke dekhney per hi kaat khaney ko dorti hian larkoon ko
our dosri taraf baat na karo tu bhi kasoor larkey ka hai :no:
Bebeyo ! Haath main har waqat bailan rakha karo
Jo apko nazar utha kar dekhey uska bhi sar phaar do our
Our ju shareef admi nazrain jhuka kar apney kaam se kaam rakhey uska bhi qeema bana do
Tobah hai, Allah mian kia makhlooq banayee hai apney Wah
**Naaz-o-Andaaz se kehtain hain ke jeena hooga
Zehr bhi detey hian tu kehtey hian ke peena hoga jab main peeta hoon tu kehtey hian ke marta hi nahi !!
*Jab main marta hoon tu kehtey hian jeena hoga *
When you get married, you automatically stay away from opposite sexes. If its professionally based, you have no choice, but most of the males ive been around (BIL, cousins, etc.) dont want their girl hanging around too many guys, or having a lot of guy friends
Maybe you should re-evaluate the company that you keep. Painting the entire west with a broad brush of desperate, slutty, whorey, etc. Maybe it’s the people that YOU associate with. I know plenty of classy, modest, western girls.
Nice, it shows the level of trust that these people have for their spouses. If there is no trust in a marriage, there IS no marriage. I don’t understand this mentality. you think that if your spouse talks, JUST TALKS, to someone of the opposite sex that means they’re having sex.
This is typical desi mentality, a lot of these type of people don’t have any emotions that originate above the waist. Just because they don’t find anything stimulating in the brain area, only the ‘below the waist’ area, they assume that everyone is like that.
I think its kind of a "desi" way of thinking to separate the sexes in every aspect of life rather than taking the view that people are people, whether they happen to be male or female. I guess its got alot to do with the culture and how your parents view the whole issue of gender separation.
How has your experience been having to work or deal with desis or muslims in general (or anyone with a highly brown conservative mentality) males that are prohibited by their significant others to talk to other females.
Maybe they are using them as an excuse to avoid people like you. It's a possibility you should seriously consider.
Im all for keeping good work/college relationships, the person should be mature enough to keep it professional.
I do believe that there are girls (desi and non desi) who are extremely screwed up in the head who will forbid thier men from speaking to ANY female for whatever reason; however i can't believe it's THAT widespread as you're making it out to be... (if it is, then thats just sad
Do u think if i ask my husband not to talk to any female he'll actually do it in my absence?? i don't believe husbands r so obedient.Its some pak married ppl's mentality they ignore ladies.even some boys they show gr8 attitude.but they r not necessarily timid or thinking haram/halal they r just arrogants i feel
lets leave pcg alone yeah? I mean she actually DOES have a point. Men like to look. They range from "appreciating beauty" from afar to sheer lustful ogling. Once we ALL accept that facta life and get past it, accept that there are certain differences between guys and gals then we can move on to the more important things in life. Guys are guys and gals are gals. WHether they behave with class or with dignity depends upon their upbringing. Same with gals. If a gal is all insecure and *****y about every fairly attractive female that walks within view of her hubby, she'll become nothing more than a pain-in-the neck nag. MOST guys, desi or not, behave decently but even the most decent guy likes to admire. The response they get from their wife will bode either well or ill for the relationship. I think most guys truly appreciate not having to break out in a cold sweat every time a beautiful woman is around...maybe the guys can expound on this a bit. Guys? Help out here.
Dont get me wrong ladies. I dont mean that its ok for husbands to drool and leer. But they will appreciate beauty and they dont want to be punished for it. It doesnt make YOU less attractive to them. It doesnt mean they're going to go off on a cheating spree. Leave 'em alone, let 'em be guys (to a point) and they will appreciate you all that much more.
I will some how agree on this because if u are looking that doesn’t mean ke they are gonna stop loving u.The only thing i don’t understand when a men or women both of them are watching movies and its actors and actresees they are both showing their selves are women gonna be possesive about that too? :aq:
i dun think theres a big deal in talkin wid or interactin wid opposite sex...as many posters sed its the sense of insecurity...i mean if ur married u shud have no problme at all...as u no ur spouse isnt gna run away frm u ...u shud always trust eachotehr n i think thats the main factor for a healthy relationship...trust....if ur gna b doubting n insecure thatll jus create more problems...
Umm I think it just happens naturally. And no one said if they just talk theyre doing something else. Oooookay psycho. You didnt even understand what I was trying to say so there’s no use explaining.
And excuse me, do not label me you bald headed homosapien
Many girls here work. If not work, then at least go to college or have gone to college.
How has your experience been having to work or deal with desis or muslims in general (or anyone with a highly brown conservative mentality) males that are prohibited by their significant others to talk to other females. I mean, as you can imagine, for me its impossible to even have a remotely working relationship with these sorts. They wont talk - they're too timid - they keep away, and then I find out its the female behind the scenes jumping on them for even so much as speaking to another girl. And somehow if its a desi girl, its even a bigger deal.
Now on a grand spectrum, how the HELL is a society of muslims supposed to thrive if most guys are too scared to be thrown in the doghouse every time they speak to a classmate or co-worker, etc? How can you even have ladies and gentlement working together on community issues if this is the trend?
Are Pakistani girls the core problem of so many of our problems?
You make a good set of points here. Generally Pakistani women want a desi man to be
1) Completely sexually naive (perhaps to take advantage of him)
2) To be richer than she is (perhaps to take advantage of him)
3) To have no other female friends (perhaps to take advantage of him)
But I dont think these points are altogether as bad as they could be. An Algerian I knew, for example, didn't want to to know anything else once she found out women pay for me (perhaps she wanted to take advantage of me :D)
But I dont think these points are altogether as bad as they could be. An Algerian I knew, for example, didn't want to to know anything else once she found out women pay for me (perhaps she wanted to take advantage of me :D)
So....why do desi men want women to be
compleetely sexually naive?
to be rich?
to have no other male friends?
if a desi is like that, number 1) would be out of wanting personal cleanliness, number 2) would be out of greed, number 3) out of insecurity. I think a different set of rules apply here. Take number 1), the desi woman would want a sexually naive man so that she can take advantage of his naivity and get him wrapped round her little finger. On the other hand, the desi man would want a sexually naive woman out of personal hygiene I suspect. I don't know, I'm guessing now :D
Sorry ma’am it is looked down in our culture and religion,
