Re: PLZ HELP ME
aww....that's so sweet.
don't marry him.
be the next heer ranjha........you'll go down in history!
Thanks alot 4 ur valuable advice :)
He really iza sweetheart..........jitne tareef kero utne hi kum bes itna keh sakti ho k i am really lucky to have him aza partner
Alhumdo-lliah em not 1 ov doz ppl jo kesi p ehsan ker k ussay yaad rakhtay hy ya ussay sari zindage tannay martay hy AND.......agar daikha jay to is mai ehsan wlai koi baat he nahe Us say meri shaddi hogi n aza biwi mera poora farz bunta hy k mai us ka khayal rakho n ussay piyar do Uk anay k bad woh Job karay ga inshAllah n apni savings mai say yeh sara khercha uthay ga HOWEVER em goona help him as much as i can
I COMPLETLY agree wid u ere.......us nay b muajy yeh baat kahi hy but meri majboori yeh hy k mai apnay parents k khilaf nahe ja sakti
His sister is 15yrz old at the moment :) But wateva u said iz nota bad idea either
The thing is woh apnay parents n apnay mulk say by-hud piyar kerta hy....He will leave me but heZ not goona leave his parents He said to me k Allah na karay agar hamari shaddi na ho saki to mai zindage bher shadi nahe kero ga :( Meri nend mera chain sab khatam ho gaya hy .......khuch samajh nahe a raha k kaya kero mai :(
hmmmm lekin aap ne kuch nahin kaha about my idea
of compromise!! :)
hmmmm lekin aap ne kuch nahin kaha about my idea of compromise!! :)
Mai compromise kernay k liy tayar ho because i love him alot...likin samajh nahe a raha k apni family ko kaisay manao :(
aww....that's so sweet.
don't marry him. be the next heer ranjha........you'll go down in history!
I have no intension of bekming the next heer ranja.......i jus wanna sort this problem.....get married to him n hunsi khushi zindage guzarna chati ho us k sath :)
But apka idea bura nahe hy :D
Mai compromise kernay k liy tayar ho because i love him alot...likin samajh nahe a raha k apni family ko kaisay manao :(
first of all
you still have time
pehle engagement ho gi na?
you both will study? So abhee time hai.
Convince your parents that in Islam (i reckon your a Muslim) wife husband ke saath jaati hai and not other way around and as Muslims we should be careful with what we do but zindagi aur maut Allah ke haath mein hoti hai. Aur jahaan maut na ana hai woh ajayee gi.
Ofcourse you should not INVITE trouble but as i said if you are financially well off then you can have a pretty relax life in Pakistan.
For example suppose keh your future husband is now living in a town which is not save then talk to him and tell him because your parents are concerned and sincen they love their daughter so much and STILL are willing to let HER go to Pakistan he must also compromise alot and move to a saver and pleasant place...there are so many projects going on in Pakistan buy a house there believe me its amazing lifestyle when you have bought a house there.
U cannot compare it with UK maybe but still its temporary solution na.
Look when i say compromise then ofcourse SABH ko compromise karna parhe ga.
Tell your parents keh Papa mama
I am willing to compromise
My future husband is willing to compromise
His parents are willing to compromise
.....so obviously they also have to compromise.
Um.
Solution:
Do not marry him. He will not move and he has made that clear. Don be manipulative to make him move. Lots of guys in the UK - find someone else. Focus on school and learn to write English properly.
Instead of passing comments on my english and telling me not to marry him will u Plz give some serious advice of how i can convince my family so they can let me settle in pak after marriage?
Or how can i convince him or his family so they can move 2 uk?
Thx!
Re: PLZ HELP ME
So many things conspirig against this - I cant see it working - if either party arent willing to compromise
Instead of passing comments on my english and telling me not to marry him will u Plz give some serious advice of how i can convince my family so they can let me settle in pak after marriage? Or how can i convince him or his family so they can move 2 uk? Thx!
Thank you
It seems you are more intelligent and wise then most people estimate you here on gs.
Zaalim logo kuch to khyaal karo yaar.
Its so easy to say DON"T do it whilst you do not know anything about the situation.
In 5 minute you make up your mind: DON"T MARRY HIM.
yah Allah kyaa ho raha hai :(
Thank you It seems you are more intelligent and wise then most people estimate you here on gs.
Spamming on other threads, harrassing users to come to this thread and help is hardly a sign of intelligence.
Spamming on other threads, harrassing users to come to this thread and help is hardly a sign of intelligence.
Spamming? i thought its not allowed here on gs forum....so far i am not warned by any moderators are u moderator in disguise?
Harrassing? helping harly a sign of intelligence? ARe u talking to....whom???
Any complex or trauma in childhood?
Re: PLZ HELP ME
Get married . Go to Pakistan & enjoy this time . It ain't coming back .
first of all you still have time pehle engagement ho gi na? you both will study? So abhee time hai.
Convince your parents that in Islam (i reckon your a Muslim) wife husband ke saath jaati hai and not other way around and as Muslims we should be careful with what we do but zindagi aur maut Allah ke haath mein hoti hai. Aur jahaan maut na ana hai woh ajayee gi.
Ofcourse you should not INVITE trouble but as i said if you are financially well off then you can have a pretty relax life in Pakistan.
For example suppose keh your future husband is now living in a town which is not save then talk to him and tell him because your parents are concerned and sincen they love their daughter so much and STILL are willing to let HER go to Pakistan he must also compromise alot and move to a saver and pleasant place...there are so many projects going on in Pakistan buy a house there believe me its amazing lifestyle when you have bought a house there.
U cannot compare it with UK maybe but still its temporary solution na.
Look when i say compromise then ofcourse SABH ko compromise karna parhe ga. Tell your parents keh Papa mama I am willing to compromise My future husband is willing to compromise His parents are willing to compromise .....so obviously they also have to compromise.
Ge pehlay engagment hogi n den shadi InshAllah!
He belongs 2 a middle class family............N there are very little chances of him buyinh a new house
Once we r married we will be living with his parents ina same house (3 bedrom house)
Once i asked him k whether heZ gona buy a new house 4 us after marraige or we goona live ina same house wid his parentz
he said 2 me k ainda aise baat na kerna :(
Mai hamesha apnay parents k sath he raho ga.......seperate gher mai rehna ya uk jana meray liy aik he baat hy
So i woz lyk mian biwi ki koi privacy b hoti hy :(
he replyed k privacy insan apnay parents k stah reh k b maintain ker sakta hy
Get married . Go to Pakistan & enjoy this time . It ain't coming back .
Words of Wisdom my friend Words of Wisdom indeed!!
Ge pehlay engagment hogi n den shadi InshAllah!
He belongs 2 a middle class family............N there are very little chances of him buyinh a new house Once we r married we will be living with his parents ina same house (3 bedrom house) Once i asked him k whether heZ gona buy a new house 4 us after marraige or we goona live ina same house wid his parentz he said 2 me k ainda aise baat na kerna :( Mai hamesha apnay parents k sath he raho ga.......seperate gher mai rehna ya uk jana meray liy aik he baat hy So i woz lyk mian biwi ki koi privacy b hoti hy :( he replyed k privacy insan apnay parents k stah reh k b maintain ker sakta hy
Well i really hope that he does not mind you financially helping him out warna to masla hai
I mean he should not be that stubborn keh tumhari koyee bhe help kabool na karay.
If you are willing to compromise so much for him he must do the same na warna to kaam nahin challey ga.
Its not easy to live in a joint family but its not impossible either. As long as your hubby is FAIR and does not take any SIDES then its workable but yeah to aap hi behtar bata sakti ho na.
But before doing anything TALK it out only THEN get married please. Talk about everything that bothers you.
Words of Wisdom my friend Words of Wisdom indeed!!
Totally agree wid happyheart :)
Thanks for agreeing . You must know , anything else can come back , but not this time . Time stops for none .
Good luck and a happy married life :k:
Well i really hope that he does not mind you financially helping him out warna to masla hai I mean he should not be that stubborn keh tumhari koyee bhe help kabool na karay. If you are willing to compromise so much for him he must do the same na warna to kaam nahin challey ga.
Its not easy to live in a joint family but its not impossible either. As long as your hubby is FAIR and does not take any SIDES then its workable but yeah to aap hi behtar bata sakti ho na.
But before doing anything TALK it out only THEN get married please. Talk about everything that bothers you.
One of my frnd told me k WOH sirf tum sy apni battain munwa raha hy
TUM apnay parents ko munao
TUM he pak mai settle ho us k sath
TUM he sab khuch kero n woh khuch na karay
She even said k...........I dun think k he even lovez U
This is heart breaking 2 hear :(
Do u really think this is the casE?
Ge pehlay engagment hogi n den shadi InshAllah!
He belongs 2 a middle class family............N there are very little chances of him buyinh a new house Once we r married we will be living with his parents ina same house (3 bedrom house) Once i asked him k whether heZ gona buy a new house 4 us after marraige or we goona live ina same house wid his parentz he said 2 me k ainda aise baat na kerna :( Mai hamesha apnay parents k sath he raho ga.......seperate gher mai rehna ya uk jana meray liy aik he baat hy So i woz lyk mian biwi ki koi privacy b hoti hy :( **he replyed k privacy insan apnay parents k stah reh k b maintain ker sakta hy **
From this its obvious that he will not change his mind. He's going to stay living in Pakistan with his parents whether you like it or not. In a way I admire him since most guys would jump at the chance to come to the UK. Now it's down to you. I'm assuming you'll be happy moving to Pakistan and living in a joint family set up, you just have to explain to your parents that once you marry you will be living with your husband. I know it will be hard for them because you are their only child but explain to them that they are more than welcome to come and visit you there and you will visit them too as often as you can.
From this its obvious that he will not change his mind. He's going to stay living in Pakistan with his parents whether you like it or not. In a way I admire him since most guys would jump at the chance to come to the UK. Now it's down to you. I'm assuming you'll be happy moving to Pakistan and living in a joint family set up, you just have to explain to your parents that once you marry you will be living with your husband. I know it will be hard for them because you are their only child but explain to them that they are more than welcome to come and visit you there and you will visit them too as often as you can.
Just pray 4 me k everything works out well :(
Thx a lot 4 ur help :)