seriously!!! your cousin should demand all those years of her life back!!! if he cant give them back, he can't marry this other woman (@itch). and , doesn't matter if he has touched her or not... it is just as hurtful to a wife (of 13 years or so and mom of his kids)...that he oh so innocently and helplessly fell in love with this other woman!
he obviously was ignoring his wife's rights islamically, if he was sharing, talking, pouring his heart out to this other woman... probably wasn't doing the same sharing and caring at home... the wife was probably home taking care of the kids, while her husband never cared to speak to her like a friend or share with her his feelings, fears, concerns, intimate thoughts and general affection and respect....instead he did this with a namehram @itch and the @itch provided the much solicted support and thats what's giving him the "feeling" of so called love.
doesn't matter if he has had sex with this other woman or not.... he has already been unfair to the wife, and has been treating the two unequally which is not allowed in islam...
what an idiot in thinking he is doing everything islamically, he is not...