All my girlfriends that got forced to marry men they disliked, have basically been forced to take anti-depressents by inlaws just to numb there misery. My recently divorced friend told me how just looking at her husband made her sick (he was seriously obese and ate like an animal) and that she would lie like a corpse in bed while her hubby just climbed on and did his business. In the end (after many suicide attemts) they just sent her home to her parents for been 'mad'.
If only her parents had respected her choice she would not now be known in the community as a 'crazy divorcee with sexual problems'.
well i used to think attraction is not important but recently i got a rishta from this guy who is 38. he's bald, fat, and bearded so he looks much older. like he looks my dad's age. on that fleshy figure, he manages to fit these super ill fitting tight dress pants. just cuz of those pants i am permanently grossed out. im surprised he goes to the masjid so much i bet all his pants got ripped in sajda.
anyway looks do matter, not just on a superficial level, but one's face gives clues to one's fertility and one's scent is a sign of an immune system. complementary immune system= healthier baby.
human attraction isn't just an animalistic thing, it is pretty sophisticated and even science hasn't figured it out yet. so it's wise to follow one's instinct. if some guy is a turnoff, dont try to justify it to yourself...think...do u want to wake up next to him everyday of your life?
tbqh I used to think physical attraction was all that, but after meeting some hot girls most are just bat sh*t stupid. Im not saying you have to be some genius, but the bare miniumum is that you could have a basic conversation on a range of topics which ive realized allot cant.
I don't see how you can be sexually attracted to someone you've only met once or twice. If, say (as in my case) four or five "good" rishtas come along, and they're all decent in the looks department. I've never been the fangirl type, if you ask me which male celebrity I've got a crush on - I can honestly answer 'none' and that's always been the case. If I can't be sexually attracted to someone I can watch conitinuously whenever I want to, how the heck is it supposed to work for a real-life person?
Thanks for the support though, ajuba. sigh The two times we've tried, it was so awkward... there's no way to tell before marriage how good a lover you're going to get, and there's really no way to tell him "you're doing it wrong! do it this way". =\
p.s. he's not into romantic movies. He watches every retarded sitcom under the sun, but will not sit for any 'romance' films.
Some ppl can be sexually attracted to someone in an instant, I know I was the moment I set eyes on my other half and that was from a distance.. Sometimes u just feel the most intense 'pull' towards a person.. Everyone's different tho, some ppl don't even want that instant spark, they'd rather fall for a person gradually over a period of time, I know that's how my parents and many others see it..
I know of many other women - mostly back home born ones that are in de same position.
Not to intrude; but Sex is a big gift of marriage for not only men but also females in Islam.
And us paki men never comprimise on this issue.
Respectivly speaking, I wonder why so many of our pakistani women deprive themselves of the same right and need.
Its totally sick to hear a lady saying she just lied there and let her husband do the biz.
Friggin hell. I think its paki womens upbringing and parents emotional blackmailing to just marry -(whoever it may be) that makes them victimised.
Women also have the same needs and rights, and I think they should have more guts in standing up against displeasing ristas. Allah has given women and men equal rights and if a man can turn down 50 women without any sin on the grounds of looks, then so can and should a women.
Narrow your list down to guys that you don't mind listening to. If you can tolerate their bukbuk, then narrow down further into whether or not you think they're remotely cute.
Most desi guys are not very good looking people, in general.
I can show u by sending you pictures of a bridegroom who is looking better then his bride but that would not be nice because they trusted me with their video's.
I occasionally make wedding movies thats why i have see many brides and bridegrooms
