I am amazed how repulsed we (desis) are by other desis.
This thread is of course inspired by the “Top 3 likes/dislikes about your home town” thread where many people are listing ‘not many desis’ or ‘too many desis’ in their hometown as likes and dislikes respectively.
Each one of us (desis) seem to think that “we” are somehow better than other desis. Even in the workplace I find desis are more respectful, polite and professional when attending to goras but will take their desi co-workers for granted.
btw, I am not taking the high ground here…I also get pissed by other Desis very easily…for example I often catch myself muttering ‘saala desi’ when a desi car driver cuts me off on the road…as if it has something to do with the person’s ‘desi’ upbringing.
So my questions are :
(1) Why do we hate our own breed so much
(2) Why do we think we are somehow removed from other desis and therefore should not be equated with them.
Interesting...
Well I always wondered/regretted why we didnt' live in a desi neighborhood...
I visit Brooklyn (little pakistan) often and I like the area..however, I'm somewhat glad I don't live there. Now I am used to moving about freely, without worrying about who will see me and "report" back to my parents. That's how I imagine it to be. Plus, it's really easy to get your reputation ruined if you live among desis, especially for a girl. someone can say something, and before you know it, woh badnaam hogee....But right now, it's more the freedom factor, I don't have to stop every five minutes to greeet someone.. oh and since that family in brooklyn that burnt to death by their landlord a coupla years ago my mom hates the idea of living in a Paki neighborhood and is thankful to my dad that he never brought us there :o
I didnt grow up around desis so I dont feel like that.
I was feeling bad that I have moved to a town with soooooooo few muslims and desis around. I was relieved to know there are a few Indian families there.
There are several factors behind this, I can only speak for myself & I cannot represent others. I have a certainly standard of living, I have certain type of friends & mix only with people I feel comfortable with no matter if they are desi or goray or kalay or peelay or neelay (I dont care). I never say Goray are better than desis.
1) Mostly desis look at you if u come from a different planet if you are walking with a gori wife, other nationality usualyl dont care.
2) 80% Desis are into corner shop business or driving cabs etc, other 20% are educated & have reasonable jobs (& mostly those are the ones who run away from other desis).
3) I of course wont like to live with cabby desis (or goray or kalay) not that hate them but because my mental or thinking level doesn't match them.
Why do I think like that,
1) I lived in London, where more than 50% of desis are asylum seekers, with low education & think that they have to earn "Ponday" or "Dallar" & no matter how the "Ponday or Dallar" come they should come.
2) I lived in Toronto, where desis are educated yet, most of the immigrants I met are pulling each others legs, I have a friend I went to school with for 7 years. I met him in Toronto & even found him feeling proud & telling me that he is much better than others because he bring 2600 CAD Home from his job as procurement officer. I made some really good desi friends in Toronto but mostly there I found that education didnt improve their mental capacity.
3) I lived in Amsterdam, met couple of mirpuri families & must admit they were the best desis I met in Europe, perhaps they didn't live in UK thats why the children were well educated & much better behaved than any mirpuri I met in UK. Then I met desis people in Bajlmer & thought "Allah nay inn kee kami yahaan bhee nahee chhori".
Anyway - in the end - my reasons of keeping away myself from desis is that - I dont wanna meet Metric failed desi who came to Europe to earn "Ponday or Dalar" and speaks English in Jhang accent & only talks about short-cut ways to make quick money & tells me "Bhaijaan tussi gori keetee hoee ay?"
There are several factors behind this, I can only speak for myself & I cannot represent others. I have a certainly standard of living, I have certain type of friends & mix only with people I feel comfortable with no matter if they are desi or goray or kalay or peelay or neelay (I dont care). I never say Goray are better than desis.
Really very good post on the subject! I worked with these cabies in London and believe me the worst were our Pakistanis - in their behviour and attitude. Their sole purpose was to earn as much as they could! Never caring how they made it! Bringing bad name to the country!
Mostly its because we Desis move to the West to get away from the Desi Environment back home. And then to move thousands of miles to the west and then live in the same neighborhood with the same people as you were trying to flee its just plain ridiculous.
I live in a mostly white area and there are a few desis here and there which is ok. You need to meet people from your own community but living in an area where Desis are a majority is not really experiencing or enjoying the West but rather confining yourself
I am not one of those who said they hated desis, but I can see their point. Najim has given some
so its not all desis but the jahil typs that you would not have associated with if you were in Pakistan, and just because you and they are in a different country due to fate, does not mean you have to like them, be pals with them, or
the second type is the parrhay likhay jahil or the upstarts or wanna bes that just annoy you, and again not the type of people one would have associated with back in Pakistan.
No one can honestly say they like the mob mentality of desis, go to any concert, there are fights, ISNA..gang fights one day or another, APPNA same things.
I believe when ppl say they hate desis or dislike desis, this is the type of stuff that is going through their minds, and they are not thinking about the civilized, educated and decent desis that one can meet, or excellent desi organizations.
other issues and points hve also been made.
I however do believe that as much as I dislike the jahil desi types and their lameness, I would rather be in a city with a large desi population because of the cultural opportunities, the community (with all its good and bad), restaurants, and just a wider pool of people to meet like minded desis from.
I grew up in East London and when i got married i moved out into Essex. I moved back to london cos i felt so disconnected and isolated when i lived in a predominantly white area. It was totally dead. We live in north east london and its probably more white here but there r asian ppl as well. I much prefer it here.
Saying that your place has "few desi" does not mean that you hate them. Desiness is not about people rather nature and you know what I am talking about, it is like black gheto-ness, which looks appealing and cool, but you can't live among them.
Offcourse you would not deal with that particular part of the city, you would not raise your family among them. In a big city, there are all types of communities, but tell me how many of them would like to live in or near a ghetto type community?
but thats the point, you would avoid desi ghettos like any ghettos. I see no problem in living in a community which has many desis if its not a ghetto.
Yes, I live among Indian, Pakistanis and other nationalities. Problem is I do not want to live among Desi just like I would not want to live among trailer trash and ghetto people and when I talk about desi, trailer trash, red neck or ghettoes I am not talking about ethnicity rather nature.
There was a documentary on CNN, they were investigating rise of Muslim radicalism in London and a better part of their report focused on Muslim and Pakistani communities living in their own shell and completely omitting that they belong to whole community. They live there with resentment that authorities are against them while they enjoy all of the benefits and protection that London police is providing them. They plan attacks and harbor resentment, this is what I am talking about, and I do not want to be a part of it regardless they are black, white or brown.
