Paying for wedding expenses as charity

[Paheli00]

Re: Paying for wedding expenses as charity

@chips6

The vocational training included cooking,sewing classes for girls and for boys something like auto mechanic, electrician etc etc kinda stuff.Once they are done with Matric and some sort of training which can enable them to get a job,they prefer them to get married and if I am not wrong the SOS girls do get married to SOS boys.The reason is that they prefer not to keep them once they are responsible for themselves and maybe think it is better and secure for young girls at that age to be married off and have the security of having a husband and own home.

I’m not familiar with how things work in Pakistan in regard to this so please excuse my ignorance. In the particular example you gave, did the vocational training provided to girls allow them to actually earn money? Also, once the boys and girls finished their training, did they work for some time before the wedding? Or were they married off immediately?

I think my belief in this particular situation is based on my personal experiences with many couples over the years who came from unfortunate/financially poor backgrounds. While I completely understand the emotional reasons behind the “want” of a nice wedding…I also believe that charities should focus on providing the orphans (girls and boys) the means to support themselves financially. And no, I’m not talking about people getting MBA’s, PhD’s etc. I realize not everyone has those opportunities…certainly not orphans depending on charities for their survival.

I’ve known several couples over the years who came from poor families and they themselves did not earn a very high income or have graduate degrees. I know several couples who worked well over a year and saved every penny they could, and THEN paid for their own wedding due to not receiving any help from family. And no, I’m not talking about over-the-top luxury weddings with several hundred guests.

I understand the concept that it’s nice to give someone a jora or money to pay for a small/simple reception etc. If the charitys #1 priority is to educate/train the orphans to earn money on their own once they’re done, I honestly do not understand why these orphans can not work and earn the money to pay for their own wedding. What’s the rush to get these 15/16/17 year old’s married asap?

Everyone has their personal values and will donate their $ based on that. Obviously there are plenty out there who would have no problem paying for the wedding, and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. But for me personally, I would rather have my money go towards education/vocational training or even provide food/shelter/medical care for children who don’t have those very basic items.