I was shopping in Birmingham not too long ago, and next to the tills they usually have a change pot for various causes, there’s usually islamic relief, children in need and other charitable causes.
One cause however really made me confused. “Weddings of orphans” it was quite specific that the money raised will be spent on wedding expenses of orphans.
Am I the only one thinking this doesn’t really class as a “charitable cause” I think charitable causes should be for necessity rather than luxury, and I don’t think a wedding is at all a necessity.
Surely that money would be better spent housing and educating orphans rather than on a bit of a bash for them and their mates?
I dont think that means that they will be renting a hall and having guests over to party it up.
I think it refers to the basic nessessities of getting married; IE a modest dhulhan ka jora, a qazi and all.
I understand that its different from vital neccessities like food but dont you think its every girls rigth to have a little teeny tiny wedding? Those people shopping in those stores are obviously having bigger events and they should since they can afford them lekin those that can't can enjoy a little piece of cake once in thier life no?
I am sure it is not for a designer outfit for an orphan girl...!
I know of some places in Lahore that provide housing to orphan boys and girls,provide food,clothing and basic education,which is actually good.By the time they do matric (that is grade 10,at or around age 15),there are options for vocational training and they also prefer to get the girls married.They are always in need for donations either in the form of money or fancy dresses that the bride can use.So maybe the jar you saw had something to do with a similar cause.
Honestly I see nothing wrong with it..!
I'm wondering how old these orphans are who're being married off and what type of education or vocational training they have received. I may be in the minority here but personally, I'd much rather pay for education or vocational training for orphans....so they can earn the money to pay for their own wedding and also can provide for themselves AFTER the wedding.
In the absence of family to support them, if the 2 people getting married can not earn the money themselves even for most basic necessities of a wedding....then how will they support themselves AFTER the wedding? Who's going to pay for their housing, food, clothing etc.? What if they have kids?
^^I have not been in touch with them for quite a few years but from what I recall this is how it used to be at the SOS villages in Lahore.They have 'homes' where 10-12 kids of all ages live (girls and boys in separate rooms) and they have a woman who lives with them and is called 'mother'.They all go to school on premises upto Matric.The vocational training included cooking,sewing classes for girls and for boys something like auto mechanic, electrician etc etc kinda stuff.Once they are done with Matric and some sort of training which can enable them to get a job,they prefer them to get married and if I am not wrong the SOS girls do get married to SOS boys.The reason is that they prefer not to keep them once they are responsible for themselves and maybe think it is better and secure for young girls at that age to be married off and have the security of having a husband and own home.
In the perfect ideal world,it would be great if they can get graduate and post graduate education and lead brilliant lives but I guess that is not so easy.
Like I said,I have not been in touch with this organization for more than a decade so I don't know what and how they work now.The latest I know is that they do accept bridal/fancy dresses as donations and they go towards these girls' weddings.
I think it refers to the basic nessessities of getting married; IE a modest dhulhan ka jora, a qazi and all.
dont you think its every girls rigth to have a little teeny tiny wedding?
No, and there is no requirement to have a "jora" to get married, thousands of people get married without a jora every year.
There is nothing wrong with helping a Muslim couple get married and I see no reason why it won't be counted as charity. Marriage is half your deen and what's wrong with helping someone get a nice wedding dress or invite people over for a wedding dinner.
Yeah in an ideal world everyone should go to school, get a job and pay for their own expenses but unfortunately the world is far from ideal and people are not always given opportunities especially in a country like Pakistan.
Wow you guys are really tough cookies; just because someone was born into unfortunate circumstances you want to make sure they observe those unfortunate circumstances? I don't get it.
So if there are no means to higher your education past the point of common literacy (which is more then many in pakistan) and you have to get married; there is absolutely no reason to give them a small wedding with 50 other couples? They should marry in everyday clothes; they should look as they do every day of thier lives and they should head on home w/o anything to celebrate.
I say let them enjoy a bit.
Personally if I was out buying my wedding stuff and saw such a box; I'd like to think that I'd buy once less outfit adn put something in there for girls who are less fortunate then me.
Grant it - if it was a choice between education and a splendid wedding I'm all for the education.
No, and there is no requirement to have a "jora" to get married, thousands of people get married without a jora every year.
I do not mean to offend you and you are entitled to your opinion,but we want to have the perfect jora for our wedding...right..?So why can't they..?It does not have to be a 1 lac ka lehnga.It can be anything other than what they wear every day.
These people are orphans we are talking about.They have lived deprived lives and although they have gotten the very basic education and maybe a job at a factory sewing clothes or whatever,cant they actually want a lil special treatment on their wedding day?
I seriously do not see anything wrong with the whole thing.
I do not mean to offend you and you are entitled to your opinion,but we want to have the perfect jora for our wedding...right..?So why can't they..?It does not have to be a 1 lac ka lehnga.It can be anything other than what they wear every day.
These people are orphans we are talking about.They have lived deprived lives and although they have gotten the very basic education and maybe a job at a factory sewing clothes or whatever,cant they actually want a lil special treatment on their wedding day?
I seriously do not see anything wrong with the whole thing.
[sarcam]
NO they can't NO NO NO
only us who are born into middle class upper class families are allowed those privelages. No no no - no jora for them. Khushia? WHY!! if Allah wanted them to have be happy he'd have given them our privelaged lives. They are meant to be doomed and hence they shall be
As far as I know, there's an evaluation phase whereby the men and women hoping to take advantage of the mass marriages schemes are screened for (a) financial situation and (b) medical health (no dangerous diseases). If the man is unemployed and will not be able to support himself or his wife after marriage, he will not qualify for the scheme. In fact, as per Minhaj-ul-Quran's terms and conditions for collective marriages, the groom has to be able to afford a minimum of 5000 rupees in haq meher. So the couples can certainly afford the basic necessities for themselves but they are too poor to organise a simple nikah/valima. These schemes enable them to do just that and to invite their close relatives to be a part of their happiness, something they wouldn't be able to do otherwise. The "package" also includes providing the newly wed couple with necessary household items like furniture, utensils, gas stove, clothing etc. So that's plenty to get the couple going.
That said, if I had only enough money to give to just one charitable cause, I'd certainly like to sponsor a child's education over this.
