PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

Have you ever had parents who would never forgive your spouse because they misbehaved with them?** Scream, yell, use foul lingo, or anything inappropriate which is very hard to forgive…** This leads them to not talk to your suppose for many years… Are parents reaction justified? Your spouse ask for forgiveness but what if she/he does it often that your parents can’t forgive her/him anymore…

Everyone wants respect at the end of the day but humaray culture/religion may sikhaya jata hai baray chottay ki tameez ka…

Mujhe lagtha hai parents reaction is justified…

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

If my spouse misbehaved with my parents... even once... she's out of the picture

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

What do you consider misbehaving?

Ethan, you are single so obviously your loyalties are 100% with your parents and they should be. But a wife is not always evil, and she doesn’t always misbehave because she is a rude and bad tameez person. Even within my close family, I have seen parents pushing the dil against the wall, to the point that she would have no choice but to push them back.

My suggestion bro, after marriage, be fair, not loyal.

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

You didn't answer my question... If your wife misbehaves with your parents and the parents stopped talking to her, then would you justify parent's narazgi?...

I will try to figure out the reason behind my wife's badtameezi, and then figure out who did wrong

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

It depends on what you mean by "misbehave." If your spouse does something extremely disrespectful towards your parents, then yes, I think your parents are justified in not wanting to speak to them. Personally, I think avoiding the person and not speaking to them is preferable to the tit for tat drama some people choose to engage in when they feel they have been "disrespected."

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

TLK bhai, I was answering more the lines of what was mentioned in the OP
[QUOTE]
Scream, yell, use foul lingo
[/QUOTE]
. I completely agree with you on this, both sides play their part.
I get that fair advice every single day :(

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

And if the tables were turned and your parents misbehaved with your wife. Then what?

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

Then they're out of the picture?

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

O bhai, why such extreme decisions? Picture se nikaalay baghair bhi situations ko tackle kiya jaa saktaa hai.

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

If someone sincerely asks for forgiveness, s/he should be forgiven.

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

This is actually really good advice. :k:

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

If your son in law or your daughter in law truly regrets their action, then they should be forgiven. The fault is often from both sides and like TLK said, you cannot keep pushing a person, they will eventually retaliate. The buzurg need to be buzurg nd just like they would forgive their own children, they should extend the similar courtesy for their dil and sil.

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

That was a joke yaar. Especially the second post. I've seen enough stuff in my family to know what's right and what's wrong.

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

misbehaving is not always just foul language

it can be on many different levels.

In some families, foul language is just the norm and doesnt mean anything too bad. (not talking about my family... but from others that ive observed).

Misbehaving can be as TLK said, can be pushing someone to such an extreme that they have no option but to push back, and as Ethan said, it could mean, just pushing them out of the picture.

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

If you put it this way, then why ask question?


There is no excuse to scream, yell, or use foul language against older people in the family.

There is no amount of so called abuse or pushing around which can call for these reactions................ unless there is .....obvious physical abuse or manhandling.

Read below also.

But........... the foul language is always an abuse against elderly person.

**I cannot support disrespect for elderly people and even in extreme situations, avoidance is better than engaging in misbehavior.

This kind of suggestion to misbehave can only lead to disaster.
**

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

The scenario is that your spouse cannot control her tongue so the parents don't want to deal with them anymore... Do you still think parents should forgive? I know a Pakistani dad cannot tolerate being treated disrespectfully. Lets suppose, your wife is at fault and she uses foul language. Regrets it afterwards but she has done that several times before ur parents decide that they don't wanna see her at all. She and the son can have a happy life but they won't allow her in the house if the son wants to visit them.

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

^ Did she apologize? Did she mean it? Is she demonstrating an effort to change? If yes, then they should forgive and rebuild the relationship.

If her apology is hollow, then I suppose I can understand their hesitation.

Re: PARENTS RESPECT (BSB HATERS, Stay Out!)

The problem is that she has been disrespecting elders throughout from the time she has been married to this guy. Now, since she has disrespected the parents in a very bad manner, no one wants to deal with her... They don't want her to enter the house of husband's father... The parents told them to stay happy in their house but told his son only he is allowed to meet them. I think this girl will be able to learn a lesson now about respecting elders... She has misbehaved so many times which has caused this conclusion. So are parents action justified?

If it was your parents, how would you react? Don't we all want people to respect our parents?