Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
sowwy i was obviously projecting [hides in a corner]
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
Baby Gabe has a hashtag already… 
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
I did what Khattichic did with the food... I never cooked anything seperate for my son. Ever since he stared eating he was only introduced to food we eat.. masalay... vegetables.. anything we eat. He loves desi food too because that's the taste he was introduced to first. He is only a year old so he can't chew a lot of food but I try to make something desi and still chewable for him.. I would make Daal if I have tanadoori chicken for dinner so he can eat the chicken with daal and its easy to sollow.
I changed my sleeping habits to suit his habits. My son (or I think every baby), would wake up at 6-7 in the morning when he was born... I changed my habit from getting up at 8-9 to suit his time and I love it. I love waking up early with him, playing with him, eating with him.
Watch your kid's diet very carefully. I started giving my son more milk than what he should be having and within few weeks he gained few lb.. I had to cut down his milk at night (ah tough) so that he would be in a healthy weight range.
I had to change myself a lot for my son.. my eating habits... sleeping etc... and its all worth it!
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
good thread....
...
- talk to your kids... talk to them all the times to see what is going through their mind and ask questions
- make them feel loved... kiss and hug them lots of times everyday.... make them feel very special and tell them how much everyone around loves them when they listen and behave well....
- have them help you around in the house and always express (by words) how helpful they were ...appreciate them infront of others to boost up their confidence level
- when they are at others place, never ever let your kid to bring their toys and stuff at your home (no matter how much other party is saying 'bacha hai, lay joa lay jao khiloona)
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
Don't hide - was good advice just N/A to the younger lot of bachai.
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
Amazing sharings guys. I loved reading each and every post. Thanks for posting. This is the best parenting thread. I wonder who came up with that.
Oh yeah, only the best dad ever could. (at least my daughters think so :D)
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
Can someone please share good practices about sleeping discipline (when and where should they sleep) of their kids?
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
my kid came up with his owns leeping routine..at 4 months, he discovered thumb sucking so he started to put himself to sleep sucking his thumb in his crib. Being the clingy mommy that I am, I woudl bring him in bed after his midnight feed.. he didnt like it.. he doesnt want anything near him during his sleep.. not even a blankie! 
he still doesnt sleep through the night but its okay.. I love holding him near me even if it’s for just 10-15 mins during his feed.
I had put him in bassinet for a day or two but then he was in our bed until he made his own trasnfer.. I was thinking keeping him with me until at least he was six months old so he could sleep through the night but I guess not!
he doesnt take long naps during the day but he is usually in bed between 8-9 and wakes up 7:00 am sharp!! Works for us, alhamdulillah 
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
marry a person who can be a good parent. _
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
From day one, I made sure that the kids ate whatever we ate! That means no making seperate meal that are less spicy, not desi etc...I am not a short order cook! I have a 5 bite minimum rule. You must take at least 5 bites, chew and swallow before you are allowed to leave the table. If you choose not to eat what is cooked, too bad...so sad. Staying hungry one night will not do any harm!
Alhamdullilah, all three of my boys are foodies...especially desi khaana foodies. Ibrahim & Ammar would eat nihari & haleem every day of the week if I let them. They like to dips slices of kacha pyaz in the nihari and eat it..lol! And Jibran is a self imposed vegetarian..he eats very little meat...his favorite meal is daal chanwal, daal roti...daal anyway he can get it....I've learned that kids actually have very sophisticated palates...there is no reason they can't eat like we do from an early age on....
I totally agree wth u my baby is 14 months n she is already eating wht v r eating allhumdullah chicken karai, daal chawal, Palou everything I think the early u strt they adapt it quickly
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
so all those who gave desi food right away.. do you mean you started at six months when you start solid?
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
All three of my kids were breastfed so all of them shared bed with me. Eldest kid wanted to have his own bed when he was 5, 2nd one moved to a separate bed at 4 and the youngest who’s now 4 is sometimes sleeping with us and sometimes in his own room. I never forced my kids to sleep separate but they are alhamdulilah very independent and love having their own separate place to sleep.
Oh and I make sure that they take their afternoon nap for an hour because they find afternoon naps very boring (they’re not allowed to come out of their beds even if they’re not planning on sleeping) and to kill that 1 hour they pick up their books and start reading.
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
Make kids ur priority set ur routine which suits ur kids
No late night on weekends no cinema wth kids younger than 4 years
Never use foul language in front of kids
parents should discuss their issues privately never ever fight in front of them
n if one parent is trying to teach something to kids or stopping the kid for certain act the other parent should never come in to take kids side
Many of us may not be living in joint families n must be far away from parents make sure tht kids interact wth grandparents regularly even if they r meeting them once or twice a year they should know grandparents n also thir uncles n aunts
My baby is 14 months n she has just meet her parents 4 times but she know them n give them response on Skype interaction though whatever mode is important
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
so all those who gave desi food right away.. do you mean you started at six months when you start solid?
No from 4 to 12 months she was taking only fruit purees n cereals n 9 months I started chicken nuggets the regular one n by 1 year I started the desi food it has been 2 months since I started n allhumdullah everything is fne n she is just loving it
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
Some good suggestions in this thread.
This will turn the *guns and artillery *toward me but what the hell?
STOP making your kids life more complicated and DEPENDENT on things like birthday celebrations, year in, year out. Their life will get harder anyway, they don't need to worry about celebrating birthdays as a MUST have to live their life. In this materialistic era, do something that will help them face life and teach them to be as simple as possible. Many Desi families celebrate birthdays religiously, with mindless, reckless spending, and restaurant reservations. If you must show your kids how much you love them and care for them then give them a nice gift of value, save for them instead of this nonsense every single freaking year. And if you feel that since OTHER kids do it and they see OTHER kids birthdays being celebrated and that might effect them negatively then just do the damn deed IN YOUR HOUSE among your family and not trouble other 50 people in hopes to get cheap gifts.
We try to not ever fight in front of our kids and there is a rule of never discussing any family member no matter what our opinions we may have about them, our dislike should not trickle down to the kiddies.
We also try to get them to eat desi but it sort if worked against us because my girls would eat matar pulao over mac n cheese anyday and sometimes it gets frustrating.
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
Some good suggestions in this thread.
This will turn the *guns and artillery *toward me but what the hell?
STOP making your kids life more complicated and DEPENDENT on things like birthday celebrations, year in, year out. Their life will get harder anyway, they don't need to worry about celebrating birthdays as a MUST have to live their life. In this materialistic era, do something that will help them face life and teach them to be as simple as possible. Many Desi families celebrate birthdays religiously, with mindless, reckless spending, and restaurant reservations. If you must show your kids how much you love them and care for them then give them a nice gift of value, save for them instead of this nonsense every single freaking year. And if you feel that since OTHER kids do it and they see OTHER kids birthdays being celebrated and that might effect them negatively then just do the damn deed IN YOUR HOUSE among your family and not trouble other 50 people in hopes to get cheap gifts.
lol! birthdays?? really???
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
Ok…gulp…this is a first, but I kinda agree with you JL… 
In my desi social circle, kids’ birthday parties have gotten out of control, with each person trying to top the other! I don’t mean “milestone” birthdays like 1st o 16th, I’m talking about morroccan themed, pony ride, simulate desert for a 6 yr old 
Seriously?!? I honestly have gotten very picky about what invites we accept because I noticed a change in my soon to be 9 yr old’s attitude, almost like a sense of entitlement. I mean seriously, whatever happened to a good old getogether at home with punch and cake and pin the tail on the donkey? I had 3 kids in 2 yrs, and their birthdays are just 2 weeks apart…so obviously we have joint celebrations and it can really add up to $$$$..some years it’s a party at the local waterpark or Chuck E Cheese, others it’s just cutting the cake at home and buyin them a big ticket item (like when we finally caved and got them Wii) But whatever we do or don’t do, I try really hard to make sure they don’t develop the “well so-and-so got do this” or “how come I didn’t get as many presents as so-in-so”.
Nothing, and I mean nothing annoys me more than the “I deserve it/want it/need it just beause I’m born and breathe air” type of self entitled mentality. 
full disclaimer…I have absolutely nothing against anyone (my own friends and family included) who do choose to go all out on children’s birthdays…to each his own, this was just my $.02
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
We had small birthday parties and we were content but I have noticed this trend of having grand birthdays for toddlers who have no clue what the day is about. I am certaibly not against birthdays as long as there is cake, friends and a few si
ple games but having a carnival to come to your house as a birthday theme is a bit too much.
Re: Parenting: Best practices and lesson learned.
this is going to be a whole new topic, i'm thinking. maybe the mods can split it into its own thread?
that said, to me, this seems very much like the lavish vs. simple wedding debate that rages on and off in Weddings. i think if you have the money to pay for it, you should go all out and do what pleases you. people get judge-y about others' expenditures far too quickly, and often times it reeks of sour grapes. i'm not saying anyone here is doing that, its just an observation from watching the debate in Weddings.
i'm having a big ole party for my kid's 1st- and yes, i know it won't mean much to him- but it means a whole heck of a lot to me and my husband. we think he's the best little guy in the world and we really want to celebrate his first year with our close family and friends, who, as it happens number large lol. having a big guest list means we can't have it at home, so we're going to a park and we'll have a bbq, a nice cake, balloons, and probably some games and a magician to keep the other kiddos attending entertained; we have a budget and we're sticking to it.
will we do this on a recurring basis as he gets older? probably not. and its not because we don't want to celebrate his future years in style, but like khatti said, i don't want him to *expect *grandness and a huge affair each year for his birthday and develop a sense of entitlement. his paternal grandparents make a big deal of gift giving at christmas (i've seen hubby's niece receiving up to 22(!) presents at one christmas from her parents alone and being completely spoilt about it) and with eid on top of that, its enough presents and gift-giving to last a while! plus, its a lot of work for me too, so i don't know if i'd be up for that or have time for it.
i also think its important to note that just because a parent has a big party doesn't always mean they're also not saving up for their kid's futures or taking care of them otherwise. everyone's got their own budget to work with.