Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
^My Father in law did the same thing actually in my wedding. To me this is acceptable. But then my father in law has spend all of his life in the army. At exactly 10:30pm he said let rukhsat my beti now, or I am going to sleep....
Cool dude.
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
All those who are whining about being late in wedding in Pakistan, please dont get married in Pakistan otherwise, Do as the Romans do & dont whine about it.
This statement is rude but its straight & answers pretty well.
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
i think people are late to indian/pakistani weddings because it takes us longer to get ready then those in other cultures...don't forget we have to deal with lengha, sarees, ghraras, dupattas, jewellery, those earing that that get pinned to the hair, churian blah blah blah........just thinking about it makes me tired! That's why people are late to weddings!!! LOL!!!
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
This statement is rude but its straight & answers pretty well.
Yeah I tend to agree with you.
If everyone is lazy, tardy, slow to get off their butts. I might as well become the same, I mean where is the harm as in short period.
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
Late hours are a fact of life in Pakistani weddings. The best thing would be to get used to it, as cultural norms aren't going to change just to suit you. That being said, it still doesn't justify perpetual tardiness.
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
Can’t believe that people are actually justifying our cultural indolence in the name of customs and traditions. These are merely bad habits that have been solidified into practices because some of us gave in to them. It doesn’t mean that they’re not wrong to begin with.
If it were up to me, I’d tell my guests that the time printed on the card is not desi standard time. I actually considered printing “Eastern Standard Time NOT Desi Standard Time” on my own wedding invitations last year – alas, my folks didn’t let me cuz it would have sounded rude.
In any case, since I’d planned the wedding as a “project”, I accepted the anticipated delay by considering it as “slack time” and allocated an hour’s delay. Nonetheless, the printed time was 7:00 and we started around 8:15 and were done with the main events by 10:30 - the two families were out by 11:00 with half an hour to spare before our hall booking expired. This was however possible, only by austerely impressing upon all desis who RSVPd that WE WILL BE STARTING ON TIME… and by telling my gora and arabic friends that they can expect things to get rolling about an hour after the printed time, so they can plan accordingly.
There were still people who showed up after the dinner was over and they weren’t happy… oh well – tough luck! They might have learnt their lesson that they can’t always take their sweet time and should respect the host’s wishes – esp. when they’ve been previously advised.
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
yeah... delay the proceedings rather than get off your lazy ass an hour earlier.
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
I guess...in Pakistan...people go to weddings for only enjoying the food and drinks...which comes last after 10 or 11 O'Clock...
If the Nikkah starts at 8...then mostly the families are presents...and they wait for some other guests too...
Once I went to a wedding in Karachi...according to the invitation card timings...there was nobody...no nothing...the gate was on a lock...man...I thought I was on a wrong place at the right time... :D
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
they have no concept of time, dat's why!
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
^^Well...if you announce that everybody will get Rs 10 for free at 10 AM...there will be lines and gatherings early in the morning... :D
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
a smart thing to do is state timings for everything in the invitations like
appetizers: served between 8:00 and 9:30 pm
groom arival: 8:30 pm
bride arrival: 9:00 pm
nikah ceremony: 9:30
dinner served: 10:00
and so on. that way people will know what to expect.
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
^ I agree.
We have a reception to attend this weekend. The invitation says arrival at 7:30pm and dinner at 8:00pm.
I have no idea how to decipher this one. It'd look odd to be there too early and would look bad if we're late.
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
appetizers: served between 8:00 and 9:30 pm groom arival: 8:30 pm bride arrival: 9:00 pm nikah ceremony: 9:30 dinner served: 10:00
and so on. that way people will know what to expect.
In India I have seen most of the cards printed in this manner only. The ceremony can be late only and only if Barat cmes late for some reason.In my marriage Barat came an hour late and my father served food to all our guests before barat came.My father said " Mere guests kyun pareshan hoN. Jinhe jaldi jana hai atleast woh khana kha kar ja to sakte hiaN.Jo Rahna chahen woh khane ke bad aram se enjoy kareN".
All the guests liked it alot and thanked for thier convinience.
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
We have a reception to attend this weekend. The invitation says arrival at 7:30pm and dinner at 8:00pm.
I have no idea how to decipher this one. It'd look odd to be there too early and would look bad if we're late.
arrival means groom and bride enter at 7:30. so it would be safe to get there around 7:15...
teazy: if people start offering food earlier im sure the guests will also arrive early :D
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
Time was written for dinner to be served and for the ceremony as well. Guests came on time and since Barat was late so we served the dinner to the guests on time.
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
Though I have seen the weddings, that we have in our family. We just start it on the time... and nobody even have dare to ask why we started it that time or bla bla... If anyone ask he / she got a staright answer. Cant you abide by the timmings on the Invitation Letter?
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
There were still people who showed up after the dinner was over and they weren’t happy… oh well – tough luck! They might have learnt their lesson that they can’t always take their sweet time and should respect the host’s wishes – esp. when they’ve been previously advised.
I think we are somewhat losing perspective here. It's supposedly one of the most special days of our life, and we have asked our near and dear ones to be a part of this happy occassion. Basically they are doing us a favor by showing up, no two ways of looking at it. The moment we decided to give in to culture, be it to please our parents or however we wanna put it ( I mean hey, none of it is farz even) i.e. printed out the cards, bought the ring, invited 324234 ppl ( desis included), we made a conscious choice, and its our responsibility to see it to the end. So those of us who are more interested in teaching the guests a lesson or two rather than the guests' right to a proper meal, we should probably take some time out to re-prioritize (the stress can do strange things to your psyche) and focus on the basics. And maybe being a good host will take precedence over other matters which are nothing but minor inconveniences if you ask me. And if it's such big hassle for us and if we feel so strongly about it that we couldn't be bothered to put up with someone's sense of timing (or lack thereof), then let's not invite them. Simple enough. So much for being "right " and doing the "right thing" all the time.
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
I can't believe it either and these are educated people. What a shame.
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
Why do you get so personal when people disagree with you?
Re: Pakistani Wedding (why Are People Always Late ???),
Someone is bored. LI, get a better hobby. Following me around is hardly condusive to your well-being. If you have something to contribute to the topics at hand, do that.