Two year old thread re-opened:MZ:
Nope only one person, and the thing is i cant even find out if ur a multi nick:mehr:
Why did you not say bad boys are too smart?
Bad girls on the other hand are not! They go straight to the bad guy!!!
Now we know he is a bad guy and what made her attractive to the guy was his reputation of being ‘bad’ or smooth talker or even ‘good in bed’ errrr “good in a bad” way or bad in a good way!!!
Re: Paki Boys and their hidden fiances...
I can think of calling them many other names but "smart" and they don't look for "bad girls" they want a preety innocent girl tht they can "fool" besides them, to show off infront of their mates....
Re: Paki Boys and their hidden fiances...
^ Smart in not a good way. The mean way.
Both men and women get hurt if they are not careful.
Specially girls have so much to lose in any society so they need to be very watchful.
If a man is not committing after a simple reasonable time then they must not stick around.
There are examples when people live together for several years and as soon as they get married they get divorce. Most of the time man was not ready ever to get committed and breaks off early in to marriage.
Bottom line:
1- Girls have more to lose just based on their fragile emotions and need to commit more than man. Its harder for them to get over the broken relationship also.
2- Her reputation will be hurt more than the man. No matter where she is living.
Most Paki guys put on this front like they are so bad, but when it comes to their parents they dont say a word. And most of these paki guys are from the uk.....
i couldnt agree more with u
I am not one to date and live that type of a firangi lifestyle, however based on what I have seen with classmates, work colleagues: Isn't dating a temporary 'time pass' (to you FOBs) thing anyway?
Lets take out the Muslim and Pakistani part of the guy and examine the dating phenomenon. Don't people hook up and break up frequently? Aren't many BF/GF couples living together even having children without the hassle of marriage? How many single unwed mothers are there?
On a societal level dating is a temporary arrangement where the man and woman can walk out at any point, so where does the fault lie? If those guys decided to end it because of their parents wanting them to marry/be engaged, you can call them names and place all the blame you want, but what did the girl do to make sure her man was going to become her husband? If she was complacent about it, then the responsibility (burden) should be shared.
I don't agree with dating, Islamically, but even if I did, I still believe dating is an imperfect system at best.
it could be a part of finding someone on your own, and it does not have to be sleeping around and stuff, someone may like a classmate or a colleague or someone in the community and they can talk etc, develop feelings for each other or in some cases for one it can be just a game and other can be serious.
it could be a part of finding someone on your own, and it does not have to be sleeping around and stuff, someone may like a classmate or a colleague or someone in the community and they can talk etc, develop feelings for each other or in some cases for one it can be just a game and other can be serious.
Sure it can vary but dating itself is temporary in nature. Just like friendships, they can be canceled by either party at their own discretion. Blood relationships and marriages are much harder to deny, as their is bond is sealed by society, the state, and widely accepted.
Honestly if we set aside our religion and even our Pakistani culture, would we want to invest our time and resources in a person who can decide to walk away at any point? I don't think so.
someone said it correctly in one of the threads on GS - Paki boy are like a kid in a candy store. They don’t know which one to pick, so they have 'em all - while keeping one in the pocket - that’s the fiance or wife.
True YOU Paki boyz, you do have a bad rep. Defend yourself - lets see what you come up with!
Sure it can vary but dating itself is temporary in nature. Just like friendships, they can be canceled by either party at their own discretion. Blood relationships and marriages are much harder to deny, as their is bond is sealed by society, the state, and widely accepted.
Honestly if we set aside our religion and even our Pakistani culture, would we want to invest our time and resources in a person who can decide to walk away at any point? I don't think so.
but a person can decide to walk away no matter what approach you take, even ppl who have gone traditional routes have parted ways midway through discussions, even engagements are cancelled and marriages ended. We all know of arranged stuff with families meeting and ppl being introdoced and deciding they dont want to move forward after a number of meetings of individuals and families. It depends on the person. yeah for marriages it is harder to end but then at the same time a marriage that solely exists because it is harder to end so ppl are stuck in it, thats not a very good marriage to begin with.
but a person can decide to walk away no matter what approach you take, even ppl who have gone traditional routes have parted ways midway through discussions, even engagements are cancelled and marriages ended. We all know of arranged stuff with families meeting and ppl being introdoced and deciding they dont want to move forward after a number of meetings of individuals and families. It depends on the person. yeah for marriages it is harder to end but then at the same time a marriage that solely exists because it is harder to end so ppl are stuck in it, thats not a very good marriage to begin with.
There are greater social costs when the engagements/marriages have ended under the 'traditional' route. Very often, parents, friends and the larger community are aware, so both parties tend to be somewhat constrained by the very simple fact that others are vested in the process. Compare this to the boy and girl just dating/living together/etc where maybe some of the friends might be aware and certainly not vested in the dating process. How many times have we heard girls or guys say "we had a great time for 8 months and she disappeared" or "he left me after I got pregnant" Whats up with that?
In the dating scenarios, I would lay blame to both the guy and the girl. If the girl is so heartbroken about the guy leaving him, what did she do to get a commitment (engagement, marriage) from him?
On the other hand, I would put greater onus of blame on the guys side under the traditional route because it is usually the girls reputation getting tarnished if the engagement/marriage falls through. I know that many guys use this advantage and hurt their fiances/wives in the process. If anything we should be more outraged by that.
I don't claim to be some expert on all of this, just speaking based on the experiences of male/female friends that are dating.