Our baby won't stay sleep in her crib!

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hey mommies and daddies! please share your experiences/advice about getting babies to sleep in their cribs!!

our daughter is almost 1 month old now, and as of last week, she just won’t stay asleep in her crib anymore. she loves being rocked to sleep…and she also loves to sleep with us on our bed. but as soon as she’s in deep sleep and we place her in the crib - she wakes up and cries and cries. what can we do (aside from letting her cry) to make her stay asleep in the crib?

we’ve tried to swaddle her and play white noise/lullaby music/moving aquarium toy with lights and fish…but nothing seems to calm her down once she’s up in the crib. we’re considering buying a bassinet so we can rock her to sleep because she likes movement.

sometimes when we try everything and she wont go back to sleep and it’s 3:30 a.m…this is what we look like : :mudhosh::mudhosh:

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Re: Our baby won’t stay sleep in her crib!

OMG!!!

CONGRATSSSSSSSSSSS!!

YOU HAVE A DAUGHTER!! Im soo happy for u :hug: this is FABULOUS larki!!!

whats her name :YES!:

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Re: Our baby won't stay sleep in her crib!

bassinet is probably a good idea. this is what we had used for ours for few 3months but i must say, Alhumdollilah ours is trouble free baby.
u got to be strong .. let her cry in a crib .. she will eventually stop and will go ok in a crib next time. this is what many women told me to do (and they did it for theirs and it worked perfectly) although we never had to.
also during the day, try to hold the baby as less as you can and DON'T put the baby in your lap to sleep (or let others to do that) and put her in her crib a lot

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Re: Our baby won't stay sleep in her crib!

The little one probably loves the warmth of mama's body and the comforting sound of her heartbeat! And she's only one month, still remembering being in the womb all the time...

Best thing is to make sure she's very snuggly warm. And if all else fails, heck why not let her stay with you a bit longer.

We have many nights where we find ourselves wishing we went for the "california king-sized" mattress instead of the queen size since all 3 boyz end up with us lol! If it makes them feel secure then why not.

Aaj Kiss Baat Par Gussa Aaya ??????
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Re: Our baby won't stay sleep in her crib!

a gona me a uncle by march 08 - cant wait dont have any kids of my own but will treat my younger bros kid has one of my own. i will be a taiya abbu.
wots it like now your child is one mnth old.
:)

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Re: Our baby won't stay sleep in her crib!

What bugs me is that she was fine in the crib for 3 weeks..and all of a sudden she decided that she doesn't want to sleep in the crib...

Romantic Movies
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Re: Our baby won't stay sleep in her crib!

Let her sleep with you. Our baby number 1 slept with us for quite few weeks. Unless you have a full size bed and its not easy to fit a baby between you.

Mamaof3 is right, she needs the warmth of mom and dad.

Right now, your baby's sleep schedule must be 2-3 hours and then up for feed. When she is ready for 5-6 hours sleep in a row, you will find that time good enough to put her back in her crib.

bas 5 minute aur...
bas 5 minute aur...
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Re: Our baby won't stay sleep in her crib!

If thats the case she may be going through maybe a growth spurt or something when they need constant feedings and close contact. I thnk the first growth spurt starts at maybe 5-6 week of age..lasts for couple of days.

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Re: Our baby won't stay sleep in her crib!

first of all congrats! :)

I highly recommend reading "solve your childs sleep problems" by Richard Ferber. His method helped BOTH of my sisters with ALL their kids tremendously. Everything you need to know about your child's sleep is in there.

Best of Luck. :)

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Re: Our baby won’t stay sleep in her crib!

I personally think…ferberizing , as its known is quite a harsh way of teaching kid to sleep. I would really recommend against it…U do need to have a very strong heart to go through seeing your baby cry and cry and cry. I could not, I did try it. Again I think its cruel. Crying is how babies communicate. How do we know its the ziddh and not something like tummy hurting or the sort?
And furthermore babies can only"manipulate" parents after they are a lot older.At one month, they cannot.
Again its a controversial technique. Personally I think soothing your child and holding him/her often helps the baby fall asleep and remain asleep. Dr Sears ways are far the most I have used since I had a what you call, a high needs child because of numerous reasons.
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070100.asp
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/5/T051200.asp

Cat and Dog
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Re: Our baby won't stay sleep in her crib!

Do you guys hold your baby all the time throughout the day?

She was probably sleeping in the crib for 3 weeks and now refuses to sleep in it is because she's being held most part of the day and she is now expecting to be held while she sleeps.

So the solution should start from not holding the baby all the time througout the day. Let her lie on a sheet or in her crib for most of the time.. Only pick her up to be fed and changed.

Tht way she'll get accustomed to not being held and will not demand the warmth at nights.

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Re: Our baby won’t stay sleep in her crib!

there is a huge myth about the ferber method :slight_smile:

ferber does not say that you must let them cry it out and certainly not for a 1 month old…it applies to older babies but you can get some helpful advice for newborns as well.

in the ferber method you just simply put the baby down (when all their other needs are met) when they are awake…not asleep so they can learn how to soothe themselves and not rely on objects to lull them to sleep. Once you put them in the crib if they cry…you allow them to for a** few minutes **(no harm in that…crying opens up a baby’s airways)before rushing in to rescue them. Go in…calm them down WITHOUT picking them up and quietly leave. Repeat this process over again. So I dont see anything cruel about this…not like you are letting them cry for 30 minz straight or anything. A baby will never learn to self soothe if you keep rushing to their rescue.

Once again i dont have any kids of my own but I’ve seen this method work…you just have to keep strong for 3 days (if they are 4-6 months old) …that’s all! if you wait til a year the process can take up to 7 days. It works Ive seen it and personally have been through it with my nieces and nephews.

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Re: Our baby won't stay sleep in her crib!

The thing with the ferber method is that its easy to pen down but extremely hard to follow.

The sound of crying stresses parents out.

Just think of all the times you've been to the bank or shops and there was a baby crying, how annoying and stressful the sound was. And its not even your own baby.

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Re: Our baby won't stay sleep in her crib!

The book that was originally published in 1985 has been used by a lot of parents who to this day have been thinking if they did the right thing or not by using this method. I think the book has or supposed to get a newer version in which the moderation is suggested.
And again depending on your baby's temperament should the method be decided by the parents. I tried the method with my first, and she wasnt a high needs baby, still I couldnt go with it. I talked to a psychologist too and his view point was that why do u think we have so many psychological problems here in US, the babies from early on are taught to be individuals...sleeping in their own crib/own room etc.
Again Im not saying that its the root of all problems here but its just I dont agree with the ferberizing method:) styles of Parenting is a very personal choice for parents and whatever way they think is best for their kids,they should rely on that.:)

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Re: Our baby won't stay sleep in her crib!

but like i said....it's not a crying out method...so i dont see the issue here.
Allowing your baby to cry for 2-3 mintues is not a big deal if all their needs have been met.

Research shows that children that dont form proper sleeping habits from the get-go have trouble sleeping into adulthood.

nothing wrong with a baby sleeping in her own crib.....parents deserve to get a restful sleep (after the initial few months) to dont you think?

My nieces and nephews turned out to be good sleepers (some are now in their teens) my younger neices and nephews (ages 5mos-7yrs) sleep at 7:30pm and wake up at or around 7am without interruption (only seldom wakings due to bad dreams or bathroom). Apparently this method worked for them.

I agree.....this is a personal choice.....neither methods are wrong if it works out for the parents and the kids in the end. But you'll never know if you dont give it a try....and there is no harm in trying it out right?

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Re: Our baby won’t stay sleep in her crib!

It is called crying it out method too.

They start out with a little time elapsed to more and more between coming to soothe the child.
Its good to know that your sister didnt let them cry it out for long period of time.As I said, I tried it, but couldnt go with it:)
Personally I like Dr Sears methods that are taking cues from the babies and understanding their different cries.Thats how babies communicate is it not?
and yes there is nothing wrong with baby sleeping in the crib as is nothing wrong with baby cosleeping with parents. It is all upto the parents of what they are more comfortable with:). Rest I will want to know when you have your kids and the method you use:cb:

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Re: Our baby won’t stay sleep in her crib!

which is why i said it’s a myth @ calling it a crying it out method:)

Ferber had an interview recently and said that the time b/w intervals can be adjusted according to the parents level of comfort (and this is said in his older edition as well) Crying it out would mean that you are allowing the baby to cry til they fall asleep even if they are crying for an 1 hr. Ferber never said that…like i mentioned before…you let them cry for say 2 min you go in and calm them down then leave again. Crying out method you never go in to soothe them and it’s continuous crying. Besides by the time you get to the 2nd-3rd day the time b/w intervals decreases (depending upon how young they are)

Dont rely on other sources about ferberizing when you can go to the direct sourse itself.

I agree about taking cues from your baby but if they are crying every time you put them down then you know that they are just doing it because they want to be held 24/7.

and yea…REST…my sisters seem to be getting plenty at least at night (sleep when the baby sleeps..isnt that what they say)…mashAllah they have 4 kids each. Besides Ive lived with them and their kids when i was going to uni so I may not have first hand experiece but i do have second hand experience :cb:

what it boils down to is you and your level of comfort some parents dont have a high tolerance for noise. But Ask99 imagine having 4-5 kids…are you going to get up for each child 4-8 times a night? or are you gonna try to teach them good sleep habits ASAP? for the first child is always the hardest to hearing them cry after awhile you’ll build an immunity to it (pending their needs have been met…some babies cry for the sake of crying or just wanting to be held)…you have to build an immunity to it if you have 4-5 kids…everyone’s needs need to met not just the baby’s…that includes your spouse. :faizy:

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Re: Our baby won’t stay sleep in her crib!

one more thing…i remember hearing this in the ferber interview…

he said…use whatever method you want to lull your child to sleep but expect to do if for the next several months (sometimes even a couple yrs). If you can see yourself doing that…then go for it.

I dont see how parents can manage to do it any other way other then put their child in their crib (or parents bed) and allow them to sleep on their own if they have other children running around the house AND keep their sanity :bummer:

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Re: Our baby won’t stay sleep in her crib!

**emm **- :smiley: thanks…it is completely fabulous :smiley:

**yourfriend & adrasteia **- yeah i think we’re gonna go for a bassinet so she can be rocked to sleep…but i can’t let her just cry in the crib yet. i think 3.5 weeks is too young to be left crying and not held. whenever she’s awake in the day, she’s on a boppy pillow looking at her toys, or i sit with her in a rocking chair, and she just looks at me and other things around her. for a few days now, she’s been more and more awake in the daytime, and we spend that time together..i find it hard to just leave her in the crib =/

mamaof3 & TLK- i agree with you..i think she likes the warmth of human contact. last night she slept with us, and whenever she became a little wakeful, i patted her belly and stroked her chubby bubby cheeks, and she dozed off instantly. for now, i really want to keep her close in the night time…and lol! dt and i were talking yesterday about why we opted for a queensize also, and not a king size!! we wake her up for feedings every 2 hrs in the daytime…and sometimes she’ll stay asleep for 4 hours at night…although such nights are few and far in between!! TLK you talk about the days she’ll sleep through 5-6 hours…just the thought of it makes me drool :yummy:

mancunian - hey congrats on being an uncle-to-be! :stuck_out_tongue: btw - you should change the gender in your profile to male…it says you’re a girly :wink: pick 1.

**verve **- yep i think she did hit a 3-wk growth spurt point; she’s feeding more frequently, and her weight gain is up. i’m anticipating the 6 week spurt when she’ll really get going and grow.

**ae - **thanks! :slight_smile: i’m all set to get both of the books this weekend. one of my friends told me about hogg’s book but i had yet to check it out, because i was so caught up with dr. karp’s. i think that 1 month is way too early for the ferber method, because it breaks my heart to be away when she’s crying…but i know that as she grows a little older, i definitely WILL use it, for the sake of sanity and sleep.

**ask99 **- aah the ferber method. i can understand that you think it’s cruel…but i’ve seen it with my nephews and neices…sometimes they just cried and cried so their parents would come sit with them through the night. i’m okay with comforting a newborn but as the baby becomes a toddler, she should know that night time is sleepy time. i’m really trying to learn to take cues from her crying…but so far, i can’t tell! so i just go by trial and error of diaper checks, swaddling, rocking, etc. ferber’s book was revised in 06…i’m gonna check it out, and try controlled crying when she’s older…for now, we just try and figure out what’s ailing her.

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Re: Our baby won't stay sleep in her crib!

DT....i agree....1 month is to young to try anything.