Re: One of the most important 6 hours in your life....Evaluating a rishta
Honestly, you can never tell what a person truly is like until months or years of living together. That is why we don't rely on our own intellect or samuj, to decide if a person is good or not. We rely on two things: istikhara and mushwara.
We first do istikhara to seek Allah's guidance and help in deciding the matter. If you look at the meaning of the dua itself, you are actually doing mushwara (consultation) with ALLAH, the creator of you and the potential spouse, for khair in all areas of your life: deen, dunya, and akhirah. So when you ask from Allah to take care of all these things, and then you leave it on him and rely on him, he will only put the most suitable feeling in your heart. Be it a feeling of fear and apprehension towards the person, or complete contentment that you can't even explain since you barely know the person and thier family. Another thing is that you will see things materializing nicely for you, and everyone will generally be content, of course, there will be some people who think otherwise. But sometimes, some lucky people get to see a vision which shows that its a good sign, or not good for them. Either way, you have to go with your heart, and not from your emotions or hormones :) A person may look very attractive to you physically and you might mistake it as "chemistry" between you two, but really he/she doesn't really fit your category of a potential spouse.
But definitely, you WILL feel some type of chemistry, and a feeling that "this is it! I HAVE to marry him/her." Insha'Allah. So wait for that feeling.
After doing mushwara, consult with your close family members, your well-wishers, and a learned person to get thier opinions. Then, decide.
From my history with rishtas, I learned that when Allah has written the time for you, he WILL make it happen, in such a way that you wouldn't have even imagined. And if they're meant for you, they will be the one you marry even if its months or years late. Also, if the rishta is bad for you, Allah will automatically turn it away from you. So just pray two rakat salatul hajaat/istikhara everyday until your wedding day, and ask Allah for khair, afiyat, and barakah. Insha'Allah you will recieve it when you have FULL yaqeen and trust in him.
May Allah make it easy for all those seeking partners, and fill every marriage with deen, love, happiness, understanding, and success. Ameen.