I dont remember at all how many exactly. From my parents I got a number of saris, and lots of shalwar kameez, some simple for home, some semi formal for dawats and some heavy for weddings. Ive worn pretty much all of the shalwar kameez and most of the saris, at least once. From my inlaws I got the shadi kay joray, some saris, and lots of shalwar kameez suits. The saris and some of the heavy suits and some home suits I have worn. But I have about 2 suitacses full of shalwar kameez from them that Ive never worn because its not my taste/style. Its sitting at the back of my closet and Im still not sure what to do with them. I am hoping one of these days I can send it back to Pakistan with someone to give to the poor
i m not married yet.just going 2 b married in oct inshallah.my mom is giving 60 suits (joras) altogether.including cotton n georgette stuff also 4 normal wear.i m taking 15 heavy n formal dresses.30 party dresses or semi formal.rest of them r cotton n georgette dresses having light embroidery sort of things.or is k elawa my mom is giving me 20 sarees.n 1 sharara n 1 gharara. n i had my wedding dress frm india.
n from their side 30 dresses in which 10 r very heavy n rest of them r semi formal party wears.n 7 sarees n ofcourse the beautiful sharara 4 my valima.dats it
they do get chances to wear them but ur right about the trips to pak most of these gals usually don’t get any so i can see why they wouldn’t want to do all there shopping all at once. and when they do do the shopping they usually make the clothes a little on the regular side nothing like short shirts and capris with long shirts…or something very different like that so even if they wear it 2 years after the time they made it it will still look ok because it wasn’t made according to the fashion at that time.
haya you are mashallah hecka lucky i wish i get blessed like you one day!!!
haya wow!!! you are getting an entire wardrobe, lucky girl!
i got two shalwar kameezes that are heavy and two saris plus my mayyoun, mehendi and wedding clothes, along with jewellery. i've only worn one of each of the sk's and saris thus far which my mom knew so they gave us money and other things instead. it worked out really well cos this way whenever the folks visit from dubai, i ask for newer stuff so its like an on-going updated jaheyz :p
Wow Girls! Masha Allah you all got some very nice stuff there. I am getting married in a few months, ive no idea what the in-laws would be making other than the valima dress. SO i am pretty confused how many dresses i should make from mama's side? I am presently living in Pak and after marriage for the initial time ill be in Pakistan till my papers get cleared and i move. So what do you suggest, how many dresses be made?
Pluz i forgot to mention, if the clothes are worn hardly 0 times, 1 time or 2 times .. is it worth spending a fortune on them and then packing them into bags because fashion style changes in just a few days ..
Where are you moving to? If the middle East etc then it will be easy to find salwar kameez etc and also how long do you think you shall be staying here in Pakistan? In pakistan people don't always dress in heavy clothes in birthdays etc but here in the USA if you want to you can wear heavy dresses without looking like the odd one one out.
I got married in Pakistan but moved almost immediately to the US. I got 50-60 outfits made including saris. I got good use from all of them. I didn't make very very expensive outfits anyways, eg the most expensive ones were like Rs 5000 or so (excluding the saris), 8 years ago. I am glad I got this many made as I got 10 outfits from my in laws which were not quite to my tatse and only 1-2 were semi formal/ heavy. All were stitched. I think there were about 8-10 heavy clothes from my side. Rest were not heavy, but mix of embriodered, cotton etc as I wear salwar kameez at home mostly.
In Pakistan you can get away with having a lesser number of heavy outfits as you get teh opportuinty to reapeat teh outfits in different gatherings. Abroad its usually the same circle of freinds so repeating outfits is less common. Also, there are lots of parties here in the USA, Canada, UK if you are the type to mix around with desis that is.
in live here in the US and my inlaws are thinking to give me about 15-20 all fancy clothes here in miami we usally have the same group of people at davats and its just lyk pakistan everyone competes to see how has better clothes and zevar and my parents are thinking to give me about 25 pairs of clothes including saris. During my engagment time my sas also bought me about 10 pairs of clothes all heavy kaam wale and different styles so total ill have about 60 pairs of clothes. I hope thts enough.?
do you have 60 parties to go to?? if so, then that should be enough, otherwise spend your money on something else! competing in the number of clothes is very typical pakistani behavior, why else would we be so successful today. way to go!!
Where are you moving to? If the middle East etc then it will be easy to find salwar kameez etc and also how long do you think you shall be staying here in Pakistan? In pakistan people don't always dress in heavy clothes in birthdays etc but here in the USA if you want to you can wear heavy dresses without looking like the odd one one out.
I got married in Pakistan but moved almost immediately to the US. I got 50-60 outfits made including saris. I got good use from all of them. I didn't make very very expensive outfits anyways, eg the most expensive ones were like Rs 5000 or so (excluding the saris), 8 years ago. I am glad I got this many made as I got 10 outfits from my in laws which were not quite to my tatse and only 1-2 were semi formal/ heavy. All were stitched. I think there were about 8-10 heavy clothes from my side. Rest were not heavy, but mix of embriodered, cotton etc as I wear salwar kameez at home mostly.
In Pakistan you can get away with having a lesser number of heavy outfits as you get teh opportuinty to reapeat teh outfits in different gatherings. Abroad its usually the same circle of freinds so repeating outfits is less common. Also, there are lots of parties here in the USA, Canada, UK if you are the type to mix around with desis that is.
BTW, how goes the weight loss?
I guess ill be in Pakistan for another 6 months after marriage.Ill Insha Allah be moving to Australia once the papers get cleared.
I am not too sure about the in-laws taste and i don't know how many they will be making. From my side, i am quite unsure. I wouldn't be able to carry them all to Aust, neither will i be able to wear them much in Aust because we hardly know any one there.
Weight loss is going just ok ok .. lost 3 pounds in the last 2 weeks. Following no diet just controlling food i eat and doing a bit of movement with it.
3 lbs in 2 weeks sounds very good. They say loss of 1-2 lbs a week should be the target. Do make a few heavy clothes as you shall be staying in Pakisatn for 6 months and also if you are the type to mix around then its easy to mingle in the Pakistani community settled there (if there is a Pakistani community in the area you are moving to) through the mosque. In the US at least women are very active going to the mosque here for prayers and "dars" etc and to become social. When I moved to this state 3 years ago we didn't know a soul, now we attend upto 9 dawats a month and I am not the very very social types as compared to others here. My cousin lives in Melbourne, Australia and they have lots of parties too. Thing is, we mix around to give our children a sense of community. I know you are not thinking of that yet but when it happens IA, then we do need social contacts. later if you do need clothes you can ask your family to mail them to you.
keeping demographics and how much one can afford and what not aside...
to do something for a bahu, in laws need a HUGE HUGE HEART and armaan and jazbaath, and sometimes that lacks... when this happens, they dont care what is the required amount and what is necessary to be put in the girls burry from their side...
its common philosophy amongst most families i have met that when its a guy's wedding, the guy's family dont have to do a whole lot which i find very rude cuz your promising to accept a girl as your own, the minute she signs the nikahama she is your responsibility, shouldnt they be taking care of her shoes and slippers and clothes etc?? but still, its the girls side that takes care of most of these things and the guys side gets of real easy... doesnt happen in all weddings, but unfortunately it happens often. sad. :)
in my own case, my parents took care of things from my undergarments to my purses.
my in laws got me my valima outfit with shoes and a purse and matching bangles and gold set.
my mehndi outfit with bangles
5 joray (very light)
1 sari
wasnt too happy with it, maybe cuz we do a whole lot for the girls coming into our family, i was expecting atleast a few bangles to go with the formal clothes from their side, maybe an extra shoe or something... but oh well.. they did what they could :)
I think making like 50 dresses is a waste and frankly stupid considering the fashion now a day change in every season. But alas it is the part of our showoff culture. People will show the status through every possible way be it the house the cars or even dresses. LOOK I HAVE MONEY
keeping demographics and how much one can afford and what not aside...
to do something for a bahu, in laws need a HUGE HUGE HEART and armaan and jazbaath, and sometimes that lacks... when this happens, they dont care what is the required amount and what is necessary to be put in the girls burry from their side...
its common philosophy amongst most families i have met that when its a guy's wedding, the guy's family dont have to do a whole lot which i find very rude cuz your promising to accept a girl as your own, the minute she signs the nikahama she is your responsibility, shouldnt they be taking care of her shoes and slippers and clothes etc?? but still, its the girls side that takes care of most of these things and the guys side gets of real easy... doesnt happen in all weddings, but unfortunately it happens often. sad. :)
in my own case, my parents took care of things from my undergarments to my purses.
my in laws got me my valima outfit with shoes and a purse and matching bangles and gold set.
my mehndi outfit with bangles
5 joray (very light)
1 sari
wasnt too happy with it, maybe cuz we do a whole lot for the girls coming into our family, i was expecting atleast a few bangles to go with the formal clothes from their side, maybe an extra shoe or something... but oh well.. they did what they could :)
Usually if it's the only son, the barri can tend to be very heavy. I remember seeing my cousin doing that for her brother's wedding, in fact whenever someone wud come over, relatives neighbors etc, she'd take out the big suitcase and show each and every single dress to them. and then fold it back and put them back, it was alot of himmat on her part. but if the groom has more siblings i can understand why hte inlaws give a smaller amount. I know if i'd had the chance, i woulda made a really nice dowry for my bhabhi.. =/
we're doing the standard odd-number joras... mom said its either 9 or 11 or 21... we'll probably do 9 with a couple of sari's and the valima outfit. even then it ends up being really pricey because you have to accessorize properly with shoes and jewellery... in the end, we'll do as much as is affordable and to the best of our ability iA and hopefully she'll like what she gets! i like the concept of the burry because its given with the intention to please and welcome to the family, but being a dulha wala is nerve-wracking too because what if she doesn't like anything??? that would be horribly disappointing and just make us sad :/
i guess its all in the research!
