My kids often visit friends who are of another faith. They know not to eat any nonveg stuff and stick to cookies and juice. I know the homes they go to so those parents are also aware of our preferences.
Someone recently criticized me and said that I should restrict my kids to having only muslim friends as they may get “influenced” by other traditions as they grow older.
Personally I think raising your children with a strong foundation of your beliefs helps kids a long way and restricting them too much could lead to negative feelings and stereotyping…they are still too young so I haven’t thought too far I guess.
Someone recently criticized me and said that I should restrict my kids to having only muslim friends as they may get "influenced" by other traditions as they grow older.
Those people should leave the US. Though I don't think there;s any nation that can accommodate such a narrow lifestyle.
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Personally I think raising your children with a strong foundation of your beliefs helps kids a long way and restricting them too much could lead to negative feelings and stereotyping...they are still too young so I haven't thought too far I guess.
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I agree. I do think it's important for kids to grow up with a good core of Muslim friends/cousins to socialize with, but they also need to be friends and eventually colleagues and coworkers with people of other faiths. They shouldn't be closed off from the world due to parental paranoia.
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Someone recently criticized me and said that I should restrict my kids to having only muslim friends as they may get "influenced" by other traditions as they grow older.
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You are on the right path.
With your strong faith, other kids will be influenced with Islam.
Many in Pakistan never had interaction with non-Muslims or their kids. And that's a pity.
Because such people show up in US/UK and they are so scared of the local kids.
Pathetic. Really!
Pakistanis who are settled in the West, should be good citizens of such a high degree that the non-Muslim parents should hold the Pakistani kids and family as a high standard for education, hard work, cleanliness, truthfulness, honesty, and tolerance.
I have no hope from the many Middle Eastern Muslims. They are too much stuck in the tribal culture.
But Pakistanis can prove this clearly that
Our religion INCLUDES all the previous messengers and saviors.
Our BOOK includes ALL the previous books.
And thus for Pak Muslims, we should be proud to spread love and humanity to kids of ALL other faiths by giving them respect, guidance, and keeping our families as role models.
As part of holding our families as role models, make sure you invite other families and kids MORE than letting your kids go over to other homes.
Not that your kids are in any danger, but having other kids in your home will allow them to experience the righteousness and good habits that is unique to our culture and our religion and as practiced in your home.
i have grown up around non-muslims but they haven't changed my views about my religion nor has it ever affected my life. since i was little i have had good company and friendship from both muslims and non-muslims.
if someone thinks you should only have muslim kids hanging around your kids, then they should go to a muslim country. otherwise i think non-muslims would think such people are racist.
Niksik, restricting your kids from interacting with kids of other faith is not gonna help them in the long run.
Growing up, we didn't have kids of other faith but we did have different sects..and I think my parents not putting any limits on us helped us develop a better understanding of our faith and the sect we follow.... and in college I was able to not only interact with ppl of other faiths but we had discussions and heck I even lived with a few orthodox christian girls.... so all in all ..I have strong faith coz my interaction was not curtailed but rather our parents would answer our questions when we interacted with ppl of other faiths.....
its just parents acting out on fear... but it works against them
i grew up with mostly non muslim kids.. other muslim parents critcized my folks for allowing their daughter to go to a co ed school and on top of that, a christian one and how they will destory me... and taht their sons shouldnt be allowed to talk or meet up with non muslim girls as they are loose
my parents didnt pay any attention to any of it.. other than sleep overs, we were allowed to go over to our non muslim friends homes.. and vice versa...
they made our foundation really strong at home.. talked to us... we had questions ofcourse as kids as to all the halal stuff.. and the revelaing clothing (for us even a sleeveless was revealing) and why we couldnt wear it.. etc... and our parents talked to us about it keeping religion out of it (cuz to a say 6 yr old.. relgion means nothing).. they need practical answers and our parents were great at it.. ofcourse we were told its not liked by god and we are muslim.. but they had better reasons too and always got through to us..
we grew up very solid in our faith and cultural tradiations... and got to keep friends that we are still close to all these yrs...
sadly its those parents that didnt allow their children to interact with ppl of other faiths or culture even.. who have now lost their kids to the western society since their kids have been so deprived, that they now just dont know hwo to react to anything else cept what they are used to and so... are embracing all teh wrongs things not knowing any better.
[60:8] GOD does not enjoin you from befriending those who do not fight you because of religion, and do not evict you from your homes. You may befriend them and be equitable towards them. GOD loves the equitable.
[60:9] GOD enjoins you only from befriending those who fight you because of religion, evict you from your homes, and band together with others to banish you. You shall not befriend them. Those who befriend them are the transgressors.
If God doesn't forbid you to do something, then who are these desi paindoos to sit there and criticize you? Pathetic. I liked EVERYONE's response here.
My daughter is an infant right now but insha allah when she'll grow up I wouldn't stop my daughter from visiting her non Muslim friends (if she'll have any).
i think it's a good idea because it opens up the minds of children from a young age and makes them appreciate people from all walks of life. As soon as you start cutting off their friendships with kids of other religions then a "them and us" attitude starts to develop.
My mum didnt mind who I spent time with but as I grew up she didn't like it when I spent more time with my white friends because alot of them were drinking and had boyfriends but she never stopped me from seeing them because she trusted me to know I won't be influenced by that stuff. Thats all it boils down to. Trust.
In my personal experience, its the kids who are completely sheltered from other religions, cultures and ways of life that are most susceptible to the temptations of others. Those who have a firm grounding in their own religion, culture and way of life tend to be much better adjusted and able to avoid temptations.
I have always held the beleif that anything taken to an extreme is bad and this has never failed to be true in my experience.
Excluding your children from other religious and cultural beliefs makes for EASIER parenting perhaps.
You avoid tons of questions about Christmas and Hannukah and Kwanza and what not.
But why would you want to do that to your children? One day they have to step outside the bubble that you have created for them and they are totally unprepared how to live in a multiculural world.
Parents who leave religious void in their kids life need to worry but If you have all the basis covered, you dont have to worry about kids mixing with kids of other faiths
Just make sure you are answering all of their questions that their little minds are asking out of curiosity.
^ MY daughter is telling all the kids in her class that there is no such thing as tooth fairy and Santa Clause. The other day, one of the moms at the bus stop shared that concern with me in a very polite manner cause Marya told her daughter that its your parents who put money under your pillow and not tooth fairy
my son did the same .... and I am waiting to listen from some of the parents. Couple of his "doodh k daath" fall down and he asked to put those under his pillow. I told him what reality is and he passed on the reality to his whole class ... i can imagine him doing "listen listen... " in the class :)
i had shia-sunni debate when i was in some prep grade (comes before grade 1)...and it was when i was in pakistan.
in europe or america, at least kids can visit or communicate with their friends freely. otherwise if i remember correctly situation back in pakistan was terrible (at least 10-11 years ago). my parents never make me visit any of my friend, and neither any of my friend every visited me at my house, let alone worrying about the dum-darood food. in fact we friends never even talk about visiting each other at our houses. we just used to meet at school and thats about it.
