Why can’t aunties and people mind their own business when it comes to weddings? Especially since not every family can afford the best of everything for a wedding. For my mehndi we held it in my aunts basement and it looked awesome. The thing was, my mehndi jora didn’t turn out the way it should have b/c my Mom couldn’t afford it to be the way I wanted. The lady who sent the jora left out a lot of kaam and said it was because she was trying to be within our budget, but it was still nice. Now my cousin got her mehndi jora and its JUST like I wanted mine. Well maybe a little more heavier than I would have ideally liked.*snif. Oh well. This aunty who was at my cousins house with me was like “its like your jora beta but with more kaam and classic detail” 
DID she have to say that?? I just smiled at her politely and was like mhmm. Then I added sweetly:“Mujhe itna bhari to nahi chahiyeh tha chuke shaadi pur zaida bhari lagna chahri thih meh”. Booya! Then she continued to say that girls these days are even heavy on their mehndi and a little heavy but not a lot looks good. Whatever. So then at my wedding this SAME aunty came to the stage and asked me sweetly “nath nahi pehna?” I just chose not to wear one, my own damn business. But I realize no matter how awesome you plan your wedding people will never be satisfied and have bad things to say. Not everyone will like all aspects of your taste so just deal with. As for the ones who say it in your face..mm..just ignore em..
"nath nahi pehna?" -that would annoy me so much. :/
Re: No ones ever satisfies at weddings
Stupid aunties...... god they have to butt into everyone's business....it's like they aren't happy with their lives, and want everyone to feel the same!
Re: No ones ever satisfies at weddings
you should have politely said, 'aap ki agli shaadi par pehnloon gi' then smiled and walked away.
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I heard a few things like that. It hurt a little bit BUT then I saw my pictures and everything I wore looked awesome. I never thought about her again.
Re: No ones ever satisfies at weddings
my wedding make-up was done by sabs. it was too much to handle for the inlaws. 18,000 rs ka makeup karwaya !!!!!!!!!
they criticised me alot by saying valima make up was better ! but then from my friends , neighbours & relatives i got very good compliments. my Christian friends were off the opinion that i was the best muslim bride they had ever seen . most people talk rubbish out of jealousy they do it just to spoil your happiness and to make u feel bad .........don't let them succeed.
I got my bridal makeup done from Mushkbar and it was fabulous, i had my office frnds there as well, who said, y dont u do modeling… my sisters arab frnds were continously staring at me and took 100’s of my pix… everybody was so happy and appreciated my makeup a lot. except for my MIL, who was like, is say acha make up ho sakta tha, man!!! i was soooooooooooooo angry i cant tell…
then on valima, she took me to a stupid salon who did my make up so badddddddd i dont want to even recall it i literally walked in my valima lehenga to the toilet and washed it all off!!! THEN i re did all my make up again BY MYSELF!!! ppl were shocked to know that i did the entire make up myself, as i was looking totally unbelievable
i didnt knew either, i could do bridal make up 
wow :0 i can't believe inlaws could so blatantly criticize the bride like that.. this makes me worried. :(
you're so right, fanna! it also goes both ways, i.e. even when you spend more money, people insult your stuff. people dont compliment for something thats expensive, they just say "i dont get why people pay more than x amount for a dress".
At the end of the day, whether you spend more or spend less, its your perogative...some people can afford more and spend less, and some people can afford less but they spend more. One of the...no, THE nicest shaadi I've ever attended was on a small plot, covered by a tent, decorated by the girl's uncle, her jora was made by her mother, and her makeup was done by her best friend. The bride and the entire event were absolutely stunning, even more so because of all the love put into it by people who cared about her.
Hmm, the “nath” comment is not too bad. It’s kind of like the situation where you get dressed up and your mom says “Chooriyan nahin pehni?”
BUT, the mehndi outfit comment was tactless. I don’t know why some aunties are like that. I don’t know why they can’t, for a moment, consider how much effort goes into a wedding and how stressful it can be for a bride…without their stupid comments creating more stress.
I personally don’t think it’s a bad idea to put an Aunti in her place, albeit NICELY. Sometimes the more nicely you teach a lesson, the more hard-hitting and humiliating it can be for the blithering fool.
The next time an Aunti makes less than positive comments about your wedding clothes/pictures/hall/whatever, just say:
“Aunti, har banday ka alag style or alag pasand hoti hai. Aik shadi ko arrange karnay main families ki bahut mehnat lagti hai. Aur aisay khushi k mauqon par main sirf positive aur encouraging comments deti hoon.”
^ I know it’s not a one-liner. It’s a bit longer. But it’s polite enough…and clear enough to send a message to the aunti about her behavior. Nothing rude about it at all.
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Some people just like to talk and no matter what you do, they will never be satisfied until they find something to comment about! If it wasnt the dress and the nath it would have been your shoes and the dessert. So even though their comments can be annoying and even hurtful, we dont have to ever try to live our lives to please them or satisfy them. If they truly loved and cared about you, then they surely wouldnt ever say such retarded things, especially not at your own wedding. Im sure you looked beautiful and inshaAllah you are very happy and blessed in your married life, and thats all that matters
[QUOTE]
THE nicest shaadi I've ever attended was on a small plot, covered by a tent, decorated by the girl's uncle, her jora was made by her mother, and her makeup was done by her best friend. The bride and the entire event were absolutely stunning, even more so because of all the love put into it by people who cared about her.
[/QUOTE]
That sounds really sweet and beautiful!!
Re: No ones ever satisfies at weddings
LOL@apki agli shadi par pehnoun gi....
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Er its not just aunties who pick and complain. Just browse a few threads in this forum. :)
Re: No ones ever satisfies at weddings
Ignore everyone. *People that are *Beautiful Dont need heavy lehngas or expensive make up or hundreds of gold sets to wear. Their beauty shines thru. And the aunties are obviously old who dont have husbands *loving *them anymore. Needless to say they need to critisise to make them self feel better.
Dont worry only person you need to impress is hubby!
Re: No ones ever satisfies at weddings
I'm glad you mentioned this!! Thanks for the postive reinforcement ladies! I'm in the middle of planning my wedding and I have been hearing a lot of these types of things. My aunt (mamoo's wife) was with us just this past weekend when we went to go put in a payment for my wedding dress. I was so excited to show her because she is usually so down with all of us kids and into the latest fashions and designers. My dress isn't designer or anything and a little pricer than we would of liked but everything is honestly so expensive these days, my fiance had to make more room in our budget for it because thats the average of dresses these days. Anways so I'm getting white and silver kaam dress that I love for the valima and a traditional red and green lehnga for my Reception. When I showed the designs of the my white Valima dress to my aunt....it didn't even take her ONE second to say ..ye kya hai?? mujhe to bilkul bhi nahin pasand ayaa. Mujhe samaj mein nai ara tum ne kya liya hain, bhabi (my fiances khala and replacement MIL) ko ye bilkul nai achaa lagay ka. Then she called up my fiances khala right there and told her my dress was ugly!!! And then she told me my red wedding dress was nothing out of the ordinary and I could of found it anywhere for a less expensive price. My mom and I were so hurt because we went through a lot to get those dresses made for my big day and we are really proud of them. I wanted to cancel the order right than and there and walk out. She did close her mouth though as soon as the lady told her that this was an exact remake of an HSY design and one of the nicest things shes carried in her store. :( I was really really hurt since she wasn't even a random aunty, it was my own AUNT whom I never would of expected that from. It was really hurtful and it wasn't even jealousy, her daughter is one of the most beautiful girls in our family and is mashallah se married in Dubai but I can probably guess why she had said it, due to some of the politics surrounding my dress choice but it still hurt. I hate pakis so much sometimes!! :(
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^ Darling my aunties are the worst you can get. And i can bet my life on it, When i get married they will slag everything off, You wanna know why? Its simple its called *jealousy. *They probly like it, But dont want *you *to look good in it. Get it? Like i said in my previous post if your beautiful you dont need expensive things to look good, Trust me! If you love it, Your the bride ''All eyes on *you'' *Good luck!
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ouch!!! ppl have issues!!! its thier way of showing that they know more.... superiority complex!!
at my cousin's shaadi.... one of her in-law just walked in the bridal room randomly... and asked...... "makeup wahi se tu nahi karwaya jahan se nikkah peh karwaya tha" (her nikkah makeup was pretty bad.... and she herself made a note not to go there again) ........ so my cousin said.... nicely... "nahi udhar se nahi karwaya, new jaga se karwaya hai"... . she so rudely said.... "acha kiya!".. and left the room!! :| ......... bichari my cousin who was already so nervous and worried keh shaadi peacfully hojaye.... go more tensed!!
I mean yeh koi baat hai karne ki? if she would have done her makeup from there... what would have they done??........ especailly when all of them were such paindos!!!
ouch!!! ppl have issues!!! its thier way of showing that they know more.... superiority complex!!
at my cousin's shaadi.... one of her in-law just walked in the bridal room randomly... and asked...... "makeup wahi se tu nahi karwaya jahan se nikkah peh karwaya tha" (her nikkah makeup was pretty bad.... and she herself made a note not to go there again) ........ so my cousin said.... nicely... "nahi udhar se nahi karwaya, new jaga se karwaya hai"... . she so rudely said.... "acha kiya!".. and left the room!! :| ......... bichari my cousin who was already so nervous and worried keh shaadi peacfully hojaye.... go more tensed!!
I mean yeh koi baat hai karne ki? if she would have done her makeup from there... what would have they done??........ especailly when all of them were such paindos!!!
What pisses me off SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH about such aunties is that they don't realize that hurting the bride's feelings on her wedding day is like ROBBING her of what could have been pleasant memory for her to look back on.
I HATE people like this. You can't even enjoy a good memory, because they turn it sour. And I don't agree with giving such aunties the benefit of the doubt. These aunties were young at one point.....they too were once brides.....and they should know from THEIR OWN PAST EXPERIENCE how stressed out a bride is and that they should have the frickin courtesy not to stress her out even more.
And SanaZaidi, you may not think your aunt was jealous........but I DO. Just because she was the "cool aunti" who was real "tight" and "down" with you girls........doesn't mean that she's a perfect person who is immune from jealousy. Regardless of the political drama surrounding the dress.......there was no need for her to make such comments. She could have dealt with her "political" conflicts in a different manner.
She may be jealous that your clothes were custom made....and more expensive....more prettier/trendier than her own daughter's clothes. Don't let her get to you. The next time that she puts you down, just calmly respond with the comment I suggested in my previous post in this thread. That'll put her in her place.
^ Darling my aunties are the worst you can get. And i can bet my life on it, When i get married they will slag everything off, You wanna know why? Its simple its called *jealousy. *They probly like it, But dont want *you *to look good in it. Get it? Like i said in my previous post if your beautiful you dont need expensive things to look good, Trust me! If you love it, Your the bride ''All eyes on *you'' *Good luck!
Exactly! People want only their things to look good, and everyone else's to be bleh. Sana, you should never let people, even family, put down your happiness; people *can not *stand to see someone that happy because it reminds them of their own unhappiness. People only want things for themselves; be happy with your choices, be happy with what you have, don't try to satisfy someone else, cause the green eyed monster is always there.
Re: No ones ever satisfied at weddings
YOu cannot do anything abt these comments except ignore and move on. At my mehendi, my phopo who didnt mean to be mean or evil said, arent you going to change into your mehendi jora? The thing is, i was already wearing the mehendi jora, brought by the inlaws. It wasnt what i would have picked out but i know for a fact that the inlaws brought what they thought was the best. When i told my phopo i was already dressed, she was like, i am sorry, i thought it was an older dress.
The point is, i didnt remember this until right now, it just wasnt important enough. MIL told me that my sister looked prettier than me at my wedding. I know she didnt say it to be mean either, she is just so straightforward.I did mind that, and still do since some of the inlaws said teh same thing again when my sister got married that she looked prettier as a bride than i did. Oh well.