Re: No Boxed Gifts for a 1st Birthday?!
If a child has too many toys, then the child mash’Allah doesn’t need anything more, and the parents if they were tasteful, should decline accepting of gifts.
My niece was invited to a birthday party and the parents of the birthday girl felt their children already had too many toys. They asked that the other parents donate school supplies for less fortunate children instead of bringing a gift. In the thank you card to the kids and their parents, they host parents let them know where/how the school supplies were distributed.
The harsh reality is - asking/demanding cash with “no boxed gifts” is stating outright to the guests that their gift is not valued by the host and the host just wants a cash grab. There will never be any excuse in my mind for a host to demand cash as a gift.
I googled “no boxed gifts” and have noticed that it is unique reference on South Asian wedding invitations. Mind you, giving/expecting cash is not unique for South Asians - I know of Europeans who “expect” their guests to pay for their meal at the wedding as part of the wedding gift. In other words, if you get invited to an Italian wedding, you must estimate how much it cost the host to pay for your evening (not just the meal, but the bonbonierres, entertainment, etc.) - pay that amount per person attending and then add a cash amount as the “gift”. People say it costs about $350-500 to attend a wedding for a couple. I’m not cheap, but I find that outrageous to expect one’s guests to pay for their meal.
I seriously question what happened to the good old days when a wedding/birthday party was a celebration and not about what could be earned for the hosts.