Thank you so much for responding guys.
I see most of the responses similar to what my dad/brothers and sisters say.
My heart feels the same way but i get so scared asking for divorce. He just put it in my mind so badly that i can never find a guy so caring as him. I just get so weak at that point that i literally tell my dad that i think i can live with him without any relationship and kids my whole life. And i do feel that way at that time. Then later on when i think about it i feel thats so stupid. whats wrong with you. I was never like this but he has made me so weak. I am just trying to be strong but i dont know how. Sometimes i think he is not doing it purposely. He doesnt know why he is doing, probably he is going thru some problem too. But then i think ok so if he is not doing it purposely, still he had 5 years to figure out what the hell is the problem and he could have started working on the problem.
When he cries, i start feeling guilty and i just feel how can i do that to POOR him. I dont know i was never like this but he has made me soo confused. I really felt good about your responses. It really made me feel like i m not crazy or its not that my expectations are too high.