Need help to save my engagement :(

See what I mean? You're obsessed with feminists and using the word "enlightened"...is that a word thats been thrown around in front of you by some woman a little too much? Either you have a lot of time on your hands, are very bitter because you were given the shaft by an independant woman and now hate all of them or you're just plain wierd.

Regardless, you have got to stop generalizing that all women in the west are feminists and blah blah blah. I know plenty of Western girls who live in joint family systems and are WAY more traditional then their Pakistan-Imported-Counterparts. Ive seen more of this mentality in women who come to the US then women who were born and raised here.

If you're going to attack Pakistani American families, then I have to say that Ive seen some pretty strange things among people who were visiting from Pakistan and were supposedly very traditional. Ive seen Aunties smoking...my mother has been in the US for 35 years and was apalled by this. Most of my relatives who are in Pakistan wear sleeveless clothes and capris. I had relatives visiting from Pak just a week or two ago who thought we were boring because we dont go clubbing every weekend. OH and btw, they also have a wierd sense of purdah too. They only believe in wearing hijab outside of the house...meaning if they're stepping outside their home limits. They dont wear hijab or abaya if other men are inside their home and as soon as they go to someone else's home they take it off. WTH? What kind of purdah is this? It doesnt matter if a non-mehram steps inside the door, he is still non-mehram! There's plenty more examples of Pakistani traditionalism I can give you if you choose to say junk about Pakistani Americans.

Lastly....................you have got to change your social circle or do something because you're just so full of negativity! Its depressing to even read your posts!