Re: need help/advice
so what is the conclusion.
can someone give me list of action or behavior for her?
Re: need help/advice
are you living with her?
Re: need help/advice
no.
Re: need help/advice
so what is the conclusion. can someone give me list of action or behavior for her?
You're old enough, if your sister decides some girl for you that you don't like, just stand up for yourself. If there is a girl you like, make your choice clear and also make it clear that you don't need your sister's approval as long as you get your mother's.
Re: need help/advice
sometime i just ignore her rudeness, but when my patience dont work, i replied her back.
Then stop it.
so what is the conclusion. can someone give me list of action or behavior for her?
Stop replying to her rudeness. When she is rude, let her be rude and try to make sure it happens in front of other people so they can see it. When she is rude, ignore her and walk away.
Re: need help/advice
yaar seriously u need to stand up for your self. if u like a girl tell your parents if they have no problems but u dont need to ask your siblings for the permission. if i was in your situation i would have only asked my parents and would have married. baat yeh hai ke agar tum abhi apne liye nahi bolo ge tou kal jo tumhari biwi ayegi tum uske ke liye bhi nahi bol sako ge.
jahan tak mera andaza hai your sis didnot get much oppurtunities (as u said) like eduaction, money etc. i'll say take her out for dinner (just u and her) and talk to her throughly. i think mentally she is a bit lost.
aisa koi chakkar nahi hai kissi ko main pasand karta hon, mager jo bhi ho uss main meri required qualities hon.
yup, she didn't and i try my best to make her happy, i think it never work in her case.
ji dinner par lai jaon, mager koi fida nahi hai.
meri baat sun kar unka ghussa ajata hai, unsay pochta hon kay kiya baat hai to kehti hain kay koi baat nahi sab acha hai. phir thoray din guzarty hain to phir unka behavior change.
aur sirf meray sath hai, mujh bary bhai ko bhi woh istarh karti hain kabhi kabhar mager unka behavior acha rheta hai unkay sath.
even, her husband told her that i m sincere to her, but she still have issue with me.
Re: need help/advice
i also asked same question with my sister in law, and she advised me to be patient, and just make my behavior too nice for her.
Re: need help/advice
aisa koi chakkar nahi hai kissi ko main pasand karta hon, mager jo bhi ho uss main meri required qualities hon. yup, she didn't and i try my best to make her happy, i think it never work in her case. ji dinner par lai jaon, mager koi fida nahi hai. meri baat sun kar unka ghussa ajata hai, unsay pochta hon kay kiya baat hai to kehti hain kay koi baat nahi sab acha hai. phir thoray din guzarty hain to phir unka behavior change.
aur sirf meray sath hai, mujh bary bhai ko bhi woh istarh karti hain kabhi kabhar mager unka behavior acha rheta hai unkay sath.
even, her husband told her that i m sincere to her, but she still have issue with me.
acha tumhara kitna milna julna hai behn ke saath? do u go to her house? does she come to your house? do u talk on the phone?
btw have u tried talking to your mom/dad and your siblings about her behaviour/ woh sab kya kehte hain?
Re: need help/advice
i also asked same question with my sister in law, and she advised me to be patient, and just make my behavior too nice for her.
i think u are already very nice to her
Re: need help/advice
hamara milna julna normal hai. week main aik ya do bar.
yes she comes to our home. she really dont call me on my cell. and it make me realize that she just does not want me.
when i called her, she showed me one or two point very harsh and it really made my day bad.
mainy ammi ko buhat kaha kay baji ka behavior acha nahi hai mager woh kuch karti hi nahi.
maiany apnay elder brother say kahan, tu unhon nay kaha kay main khud direct baat karon. aur mainay waisay hi kiya mager koi fida nahi howa.
woh kehtay hain kay zarrori nahi kay unak behavior theek ho. main thand main rahon. main kehta hon kay unkay elawa yahan koi nahi.
this morning, i requested to my brother to tell her that she really need to correct her behavior.
now i m waiting what happens.
Re: need help/advice
and why aren't you marrying? i mean you are 26, and if you are married to bombshell she will take care of your sister :D
Re: need help/advice
hamara milna julna normal hai. week main aik ya do bar. yes she comes to our home. she really dont call me on my cell. and it make me realize that she just does not want me. when i called her, she showed me one or two point very harsh and it really made my day bad.
mainy ammi ko buhat kaha kay baji ka behavior acha nahi hai mager woh kuch karti hi nahi. maiany apnay elder brother say kahan, tu unhon nay kaha kay main khud direct baat karon. aur mainay waisay hi kiya mager koi fida nahi howa.
woh kehtay hain kay zarrori nahi kay unak behavior theek ho. main thand main rahon. main kehta hon kay unkay elawa yahan koi nahi.
this morning, i requested to my brother to tell her that she really need to correct her behavior. now i m waiting what happens.
ok one last question tum akele rehte ho?
Re: need help/advice
no, me and my brother live together.
Re: need help/advice
please dont complain to your SIL about your sister. If you dont like the girl she likes, then just say her. Also dont giver her the opportunity to get mad at you. When you call her, do salam dua, ask about the kids and then say I have to go, will talk to you later. Find yourself friends and other activities so you dont feel too lonely.
Re: need help/advice
my sil is last resource who at least communicate nicely with me.
Re: need help/advice
Ok after reading everything again my final advice is to completely INGNORE her (since your bro says talk to her yourself, your mom isnot helping either, you have been nice to her but still her behaviour is the same).
she calls you dont answer
you dont call her
dont go to her house
if she comes to your house ignore her
a point will come when she will ask you why u ingoring her (or your bros wil ask you). and then u should explain her everything in detail. (perhaps it will be a good idea if you talk her on your own without involving anyone else)
NOW SECONDLY
if you think you cant ignore her then be extra extra nice to her. for example buy her gifts...tohfe le ke jao aur tohfa dete hue kaho ke "ke yeh main apni baji ke liye laya hoon sirf aur sirf....tareef karo etc"
ignoring or being extra nice...either way will surely help. good luck
Re: need help/advice
ok i will get with you people back and let you update my situation.
Re: need help/advice
ok i will get with you people back and let you update my situation.
chalo theek...do let us know...all the best.
Re: need help/advice
Ok after reading everything again my final advice is to completely INGNORE her (since your bro says talk to her yourself, your mom isnot helping either, you have been nice to her but still her behaviour is the same).
she calls you dont answer you dont call her dont go to her house if she comes to your house ignore her
a point will come when she will ask you why u ingoring her (or your bros wil ask you). and then u should explain her everything in detail. (perhaps it will be a good idea if you talk her on your own without involving anyone else)
NOW SECONDLY
if you think you cant ignore her then be extra extra nice to her. for example buy her gifts...tohfe le ke jao aur tohfa dete hue kaho ke "ke yeh main apni baji ke liye laya hoon sirf aur sirf....tareef karo etc"
ignoring or being extra nice...either way will surely help. good luck
you mean buttering.
ab yehi karna paray ga, i am sure, it will work.
Re: need help/advice
you mean buttering. ab yehi karna paray ga, i am sure, it will work.
yes buttering agar ignore nahi ker sakte tou makhan lagao. tohfe do, tareef karo, support karo like she says something for example "i love biryani" so say to her "i totally agree with you, u are sooo right, great choice...it is the best etc"