Re: Need advice:
PD....good advice! It;s a great source for domestic violence victims.
And here is a cut n paste for those who want to hear HIS side of the story;
Does Sakhi believe every woman who calls for help? Do you talk to the men to find out "his side of the story"?:
When a woman contacts Sakhi and says that she has experienced abuse, we do not talk to the perpetrator(s). It is our policy to believe each woman who calls for help. We know how difficult it is for women to speak about what is going on in the confines of her home. After an abusive incident, the batterer often places the blame upon her, without acknowledging that that there is no excuse for his behavior. At Sakhi, we seek to listen to her without judgement and support her the best that we can.
If I know a woman who is abused, what can I do?:
Assure her of confidentiality. Validate the woman's experience. Let her know that she is not alone and that abuse is not her fault. Listen to her and support her without blame or judgement. Provide her with resources, including information on domestic violence organizations like Sakhi. Offer to be a contact person in an emergency. Respect her right to self-determination and choose her own path.
What are the effects of abuse on the children?:
All children suffer from witnessing their father abuse their mother. In addition to the psychological effects, children can, in fact, be direct targets of abuse. Studies indicate that it is better for children to live without their perpetrating father than in a two-parent household that is abusive. Also, boys who witness abuse are at greater risk to become perpetrators of violence in adulthood.