woah..bloody hell woman..i wouldnt know what to say, i read that like someone would say it real fast as if it needed no consideration..."eeesh" is all i can think of to say......
no obviously it needs consideration... its just so confusing.....i don't know what to say either....
i keep reading it and yet it confuses me more..this is about you or a friend?
personally..i think i would need to talk to him before the marriage..and erm...i really dont know, although, i would never marry someone i wouldnt be able to trust even though i know that may not be possible, but eeeshhhh
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Miss_Mohabbat: *
i keep reading it and yet it confuses me more..this is about you or a friend?
personally..i think i would need to talk to him before the marriage..and erm...i really dont know, although, i would never marry someone i wouldnt be able to trust even though i know that may not be possible, but eeeshhhh
[/QUOTE]
ya a friend, very very close and very special....
Call it off. He is probably telling you the truth. It takes the burden off his shoulders by telling you so.
If he was saying all this before wedding cards were distributed then chances were he is testing your personality.
Are there any positive things about the guy that you would like to share?
What if the guy is in serious trouble and totally confused as to what to do himself,maybe this is his only way of asking for help, she needs to probe him for more details.
I wouldnt call it off so quickly, sometiems people dont know how and when to ask for help... how long has she known him for?
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Fayz: *
Call it off. He is probably telling you the truth. It takes the burden off his shoulders by telling you so.
If he was saying all this before wedding cards were distributed then chances were he is testing your personality.
Are there any positive things about the guy that you would like to share?
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positive things, yes they were before he started all this conversation....I'll get back with you on this one..
Definitely, alarm bells should be going on by now. I think it's very inappropriate to start discussing such matters just before the wedding. He should have been upfront with you right from the get go. How long has your friend known him? Surely she must have some indications or signs from prior knowledge?
Lusi, Ok good...I'd be quite interested how a girl's mind work.
These are quite a few surprises right before the wedding. Someone who is upfront and sincere should be considerate as well. Bad credit, green card, mom coming over**, lay off…Mohabbat you must be a very nice girl that you are still positive about the whole thing.
** refers to high risk situation
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Miss_Mohabbat: *
What if the guy is in serious trouble and totally confused as to what to do himself,maybe this is his only way of asking for help, she needs to probe him for more details.
I wouldnt call it off so quickly, sometiems people dont know how and when to ask for help... how long has she known him for?
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he says he has good savings, i don't know what kind of help he needs...she knows him for 6 months.
6 months???????????
wtf
i wouldn't even be engaged within 6 months...ok time to get real...its all gona end in tears ....she needs to "talk" to him and maybes delay the marriage.
Fayz...mrs, of course im nice...im too nice for anyone here to realise
If these were his plans...why would he
tell her before the wedding, when he would have
all the opportunity afterwards.
Believe me people like that would never let u know what
their plans were beforehand. I really don't know why he would
be telling her this sorta stuff. But if these were his real intentions
he would make sure he deosn't let her get suspicious before the wedding.
Sorry that's what i think.
Is he trying to make her call it off? Not to scare you or anything, but I remember something similar happened to someone I knew. Everything was arranged, but apparently the guy wasn't too thrilled. He tried to give her hints at first, but when she didn't really 'respond', he called it off on the day of their mehndi.
I hope to God, that isn't the case. Again, I didn't mean to scare you. Maybe she should have a talk with him. Ask him why he's talking about it now.
calling off marriage for these reasons sounds insane. these r hardly the type of reasons one calls off marriages for. these matters r all "overcomeable" and not such big issues. if he had another wife whom he was married to and didn't tell her about, now that would be a reason to seriously reconsider the marriage.
edit: agree w/ SAJAL & CareBear as well
hmmm
how do they know each other and how has this “marriage” been arranged? are her parents involved in this at all?
if she has any concerns she should perhaps talk to her parents about them and they can also research more into this.
^ It’s not that the issues are “overcomable” or not. It’s the fact that you are dealing with a dodgy personality. I wouldn’t even do business with this guy let alone behn da wya kura dawaN. 
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by skhan: *
Definitely, alarm bells should be going on by now. I think it's very inappropriate to start discussing such matters just before the wedding. He should have been upfront with you right from the get go. How long has your friend known him? Surely she must have some indications or signs from prior knowledge?
[/QUOTE]
agreed!
This is surely a very serious issue.The wedding should be called off.
I agree with Fayz. This dude sure sounds dodgy. But the things is, what should she do now??involve the family?
Sheesh, when I finally come around to beliveing arranged marriages prolly turn out ok, I hear these kinda stories! 
FAYZ u got a point there. hmmm. i dono. im such a dodgy personality myself ive stopped thinking of others as dodgy :D