Re: My sister wants to marry...
If the guy is a muslim thats all what matters most and if they are happy then u can decide.DO ISTkHARA and ALLAH will help u INSHALLAH
Re: My sister wants to marry...
and what ever happens the final decision will be the one agreed mutually between my sis and parents!!!
THEN ITS GOOD that he is a muslim my freind got maarried to american muslim and they are fine
Re: My sister wants to marry...
and what ever happens the final decision will be the one agreed mutually between my sis and parents!!!
THEN ITS GOOD that he is a muslim my freind got maarried to american muslim and they are fine
Re: My sister wants to marry...
I am surprised how much we are willing to let the culture dictate our lives as compared to islam itself, judging based on some replies.
to be honest with you i have enough on my plate to go interfering in other ppls lives bt i can see what u mean, though it shudn't be a problem cos my sis lives up north, and i don't think she'll be moving down after she's married!!
the only reason i asked for ur opinions is cuz i want her to know all the facts before she makes her final decision.
hes a scot and his parents are kinda wary of islam, so i dont think there'll be bothering them either. :)
Re: My sister wants to marry...
Wah, the hypocricy, on the one hand, all people here do is Allah Allah, and then you say that it's not a good idea to marry another muslim because of the color of his skin and his culture. Laughable. If God doesn't see anything wrong with it, who are you to discourage it? Are you questioning God's wisdom who said that the righteous for the righteous? He didn't put a footnote there saying "as long as the righteous parties are the same color and of the same background"
Like amana, I'm absolutely disgusted by a lot of replies here. Ingorance breeds ignorance, lage raho.
Re: My sister wants to marry...
unbiased, just to clarify, i dont mean you would be interfering. when i say you, i dont mean YOU in person. I mean it in a general sense.
Re: My sister wants to marry...
I agree with amana and Raheel. It certainly won't be easy, but all marriages take work. As long as they are going into marriage with a thoughtful, mature, and faithful approach, inshAllah all will go well.
Re: My sister wants to marry…
lol @ some of the replies.
They are talking as if you marry a chocolate guy things are all hunky dory
Re: My sister wants to marry...
I think she'll be better off than marrying a pakistani muslim guy. How about you meet the guy and base your judgement of him after talking to him, rather than jumping to conclusions just because he's not Pakistani? Most Pakistani people aren't the greatest of muslims anyway, and from my experience, most converts know more about Islam than others because they made an informed decision when converting.
Re: My sister wants to marry...
there should be no problem. We give too much importance to Culture BS.
They should go for it, Inshallah it will be a happy marriage. If there is any doubt then just do Istikhara, Nothing else is important here.
Re: My sister wants to marry...
couldnt give a toss..
Re: My sister wants to marry...
thanks for all ur views.
i know all marriages take work, and insha-allah, Allah will guide them!!
and as some1 mentioned in one of the above posts we have met the guy he is a decent fellow as far as we can see, we've known him for a while now, its not exactly a love marriage he has proposed idrectly to her but also spoken to my parents, hes a good guy and she has accepted his proposal last night,
i mean their both mature adults and insh-Allah all will go well for them.
we pray for them and if u could too, Allah will bestow his bounties upon them and u also!! :)
Re: My sister wants to marry...
I hope and pray that both of them have a happy and long married life. The guy is a muslim and you people have met him and know him. That is all that matters. Inshallah it will be fine.
Re: My sister wants to marry...
MaashaAllah thats great news. Good luck and lots of duas for the new couple to be, InshaAllah.
Re: My sister wants to marry...
thanks to u both, Ira and Ehsan for ur duas!! :)
i'm sure my sis will appreciate them.
Re: My sister wants to marry...
congratulations ANd lots of duas for new coouple and May ALLAH GIVE them an understanding and happy life AMEEN
Re: My sister wants to marry...
Compatibility when it comes to ethnicity or tribe shouldn’t be an issue, yes there can be cultural differences but people can always adopt their partners’ culture depending on which partners' country they live in, in this age of cosmopolitan cultures language is the only cultural difference amongst different ethnic groups and lots of people are bilingual anyway, I for example speak five languages pretty much fluently.
Islam is the only real thing, people change ethnicities anyway so why can't they do that for their partners? For example my tribe was originally Turk hundreds of years ago now they are Pashtun after moving to our regions and assimilating into the locals, ethnicity is just regional culture and tradition.
Akhiy you seem like a knowledgable person but don't fall for any verdict some Cleric passes, even great scholars who we respect have made a few mistakes in their rulings and later ignorant scholars have embraced their incorrect rulings without looking to the authentic sources to verify these rulings like they should have done.
In the days of pre-Islamic ignorance the Arabs were very big on their lineages and were very arrogant about these things but our Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم who was of the most noble lineage by their own society's standards preached against 'Assabiyyah (racism, ethnicism, tribalism) and united Blacks, Whites, Browns, Yellows, Romans, Ethiopians, Persians, Hebrews, Arabs... as a Muslim nation of brothers and equals united in Islaam to Allaah The Exalted and Majestic.
Let us look to the Book and the Sunnah for guidance.
Allaah Azza Wa Jalla says (intrepretation of the meaning):
"O mankind! We have created you from a male and a female, and made you into nations and tribes, that you may know one another. Verily, the most honourable of you with Allaah is that (believer) who has At‑Taqwa *. Verily, Allaah is All‑Knowing, All‑Aware” [Quran 49:13]
"And marry among you who are single and the Pious of your slaves and slavesses. If they be poor, Allaah will enrich them out of His Bounty. And Allaah is All-Sufficent for His creatures' needs, All-Knowing." (Quran 24:32)
“The believers are nothing else than brothers” (Quran 49:10)
"O you who believe! Let not a group scoff at another group, it may be that the latter are better than the former; nor let (some) women scoff at other women, it may be that the latter are better than the former…” [Quran 49:11]
“The believers, men and women, are Awliyaa’ (helpers, supporters, friends, protectors) of one another” (Quran 9:71)
“So their Lord accepted of them (their supplication and answered them), “Never will I allow to be lost the work of any of you, be he male or female. You are (members) one of another” (Quran 3:195)
The blessed Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said:
"There is no superiority of an Arab over a non-Arab, or of a non-Arab over an Arab, or of a white man over a black man, or of a black man over a white man, except in terms of piety. The people come from Adam and Adam came from dust.”
"A woman is married for four (reasons); for her wealth, for her lineage, for her beauty and for her religion, so triumph (by choosing) a religious woman; may your hands be rubbed with dust (i.e. may you prosper)."
“Those who boast about their forefathers should desist or they will be less significant before Allaah than the beetle that rolls up the dung with its nose. Allaah has taken away from you the arrogance of Ignorance and its pride in forefathers, so a person is either a pious believer or a doomed evildoer. All the people are the children of Adam and Adam was created from dust.”
“O you who believe, verily your Lord is One, and your father [Adam] is one. There is no superiority of an Arab over a non-Arab or of a non-Arab over an Arab, or of a red man over a black man or of a black man over a red man, except in terms of taqwa (piety). Have I conveyed (the message)?” Those present said: “The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) has conveyed (the message).”
"The people of such and such a tribe are not my friends and supporters, rather my friends and supporters are the pious, no matter where they are.”
“If there comes to you one with whose religious commitment and character you are pleased, then marry your daughter [or female relative under your care] to him, for if you do not do that then there will be much tribulation and mischief in the land.” Those present said, “O Messenger of Allaah, what if there is some other objection?” *He said, *“If there comes to you one with whose religious commitment and character you are pleased, then marry your daughter [or female relative under your care] to him,” three times.
“It is sufficient sin for a man to look down upon his brother Muslim, every thing of a Muslim is sanctified for another Muslim: His blood and his honour and his property.”
And he صلى الله عليه وسلم said to Banu Bayaadah: “Accept Abu Hind’s proposal if he proposes marriage and seek his daughter’s hands in marriage” and he was a cupper.
"Allaah does not look at your appearance or your wealth, but He looks at your hearts and your deeds."
Sahl Ibn Sa'd al-Saa'idi said: "A man passed by the Messenger of Allaah صلى الله عليه وسلم and he asked a man who was sitting with him, ‘What do you think of this man?’ He said, ‘He is one of the nobility. By Allaah, if he proposes marriage he deserves to get married and if he intercedes, his intercession deserves to be accepted.’ The Messenger of Allaah صلى الله عليه وسلم said nothing. Then another man passed by, and the Messenger of Allaah صلى الله عليه وسلم asked, ‘What do you think of this man?’ He said, ‘O Messenger of Allaah, he is one of the poor Muslims. If he proposes marriage he does not deserve to get married, if he intercedes his intercession does not deserve to be accepted and if he speaks he does not deserve to be heard.’ The Messenger of Allaah صلى الله عليه وسلم said: ‘This one (the second man) is better than an earthful of (men like) that one (the first man).’”
Abu Dharr said: *“I exchanged words with another man, whose mother was a non-Arab. I said to him, ‘O son of a black woman’, and he mentioned that to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). He said to me, ‘Did you trade insults with So and so?’ I said, ‘Yes.’ He said, ‘Did you insult his mother?’ I said, ‘Yes.’ He said, ‘You are a man in whom is ignorance…’” *
The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم married his cousin Zainab Bint Jahsh to Zayd ibn Harithah, his freed slave, and he married Fatimah Bint Qays who was from his tribe Quraysh to Zayd's son Usamah. Bilal the freed Abyssinian slave married the sister of Abdul-Rahman Ibn Awf. Similarly, Abu Hudhayfah Ibn Utbah Ibn Rabiah, who was from Quraysh, married his freed slave Salim to the daughter of his brother Al-Walid Ibn Utbah.
Some of our Noble Mothers: the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم wives (may Allaah be pleased with them) were not of the Prophet's صلى الله عليه وسلم tribe or ethnicity.*
Re: My sister wants to marry...
Compromise....
Re: My sister wants to marry...
Go for it.
The cultural differences wont be the least interfering, most americans have an interest in trying new stuff out and whatnot.
She should definitely go for it.
Besta luck. =D
p.s:- some ppl have mentioned the Prophet (PBUH) in their comments, i'd suggest they post authentic ahadith etc, and not just mention it of what they know. Something someone once taught me. =)
Re: My sister wants to marry...
Yup, Raheel's on the right track. nods