My Rishta demands

[zobia]

Re: My Rishta demands

@redvelvet

1. I think in one hadith, the Prophet SAWS told his companions (who were distressed for not being in a constant state of worship)…that there’s a time for this and a time for that. He SAWS also said that the heart is always changing…that it doesn’t remain in one condition all the time. And I either read or heard from someone that if you don’t feel like reading the Quran…take a break from it. It’s better to read it with an attentive heart. When something begins to seem more like a chore…it can become easy to lose your motivation/attentiveness for it. It’s admirable that you want someone who is religious. But there are some points to consider. You can have someone who reads the Quran every day…but does not act upon its messages…who doesn’t really learn from or internalize it. You can have someone who doesn’t read the Quran every day, but is active in following some of the very basic principles of Islam such as interacting with others respectfully, being generous, being patient, etc. There are even maulvis who will pray 5 times a day…read Quran frequently…and then molest little children. So, think of the exceptions. There should be a balance of deen and duniya. Also, in a hadith it is said that if one makes religion difficult for himself…it will become difficult to follow.

2. This can depend upon what field the degree is in? Is it in something practical…or impractical like humanities and philosophy? What is he doing with the degree? Is he hardworking or lazy? You can get a “foreign” degree and not do much with it.

3. Many people have this misconception (especially desis) that Istikhara will lead to a dream that you will see…which will give you some sort of sign as to what direction to go in. Not necessarily. In the Istikhara dua…you ask Allah that if He in His wisdom knows that something is good for you in this world and the next that he make it easy for you. And if He knows that something is not good for you in this world or the next…that He turn it away from you. The underlined words don’t imply seeing a dream. Rather, the events in your life will unfold in a way as to make the matter easy for you…or difficult/impossible for you. So, it’s not like he also needs to do Istikhara in order to make things work. One person can also do it…and in the end what’s meant to be will happen.

1. in my intial post i mentioned three things a. Recite Quran, b. reads translation c. reads Tafseer…all three of them are different things and serves a different purpose in molding our thoughts into. whereas some being a child molest or not well you can never be sure that who is pedophile and who is not and you are also cant have a knowledge that one could become one after the marriage. the mentioning of this demand was not to get the prospect guy into some Qirat competition but the one who tries to follow Quran and Sunnah. which means no adultry (may be he commited in his pervious life but says toobah), no disrespecting any fellow human being, offeres his prayers, pays zakat, dreams about performing haj, thinks justice and only consider ALLAH SWT being his creator and only ask HIM SWT for her…so no peer fakeeri.

2. i mentioned about me and my sibs have done their schooling outside of Pakistan. It doesn’t matter where he gets his education from as long as he is working here because at the moment I cant support any one and get marry in Pakistan and get him here.

3. I have done Istakhara before and its really hard amal. you feel entire house is over you, sweating and suffocation and what not.

ps. yaar RV these are just my way of looking into any guy so I am not that picky about em. even if he dont fulfill any of the requirement but I have surety that ALLAH has chosen him for me I will go for him. but I pray to my Lord Please get me someone who I pray for. Ameen