my problem

Lifestyle Relationships
41

Re: my problem

Agreed to first line ..

But if your freedom of speech is hurting someone and taking hope frome someone .u must stop that

42

Re: my problem

And I will add, you have no right to speak on behalf of OP. As I stated already, if OP herself feels that I need to stop participating on this thread, then she can tell me that herself. As for you, just like some other members have done so already, you are welcome to disagree with my suggestions and offer your own thoughts on how she can improve her situation.

I like to provide people with options which I believe are realistic solutions to their problems. And often the solutions to our problems don't make us happy....but they do solve the problem at hand. If you want your suggestions to lean more towards making them feel warm/fuzzy and provide hope, then that's your choice.

I have no intention of derailing this thread with this conversation so this is the last time I will repond to your comments about what I should do. I strongly urge you to re-direct your focus towards OPs situation and stick to the topic in this thread.

43

Re: my problem

I agree with paheli on a lot of this.
I know if my MIL wanted to live with hubby and I, I wouldn't mind. However, if she started asking me to clean and switching up stuff, I would get upset. OP will have to make compromises if she wants to stay with her son. The DIL will come up with new stuff to pick on her MIL… but at this point, OP's choices are limited.

44

Re: my problem

I think my hubby will send me packing if I become DIL like the OPs.
When in our parents’ home, we do a lot of things our mothers tell us.
Why can’t we do the same with MIL as well?

OP, I think you are better off living alone in Pakistan.
Join some nearby organisation do some voluntary charitable work
Teach kids in your neighbourhood

How big is your house? Give some rooms on rent and hire a helper

45

Re: my problem

Pakistan is the bestest place to live in,even if that means being alone. Atleast the neighbors talk,the talkative maid comes around with gossip...pakistani Telly channels are the best,visiting shopping places makes one happy,going to shadis is the bestest!plus you're a High-tech mommy!know how to use internet!that's great!

seems the bahu will never accept you,will only make things bitter between you and your son.Hence,i'd say,keep relations with son same as before,just ask him to visit in vacations..that's the least he can do for you.And ofcourse financially support you,more than he used to than before,That's for your security.

Ask married daughters to visit you often if possible.
Any relatives who can stay with you?apart from children?Invite friends over to keep you company sometimes.
Pets are a good company
Try keeping yourself busy,try staying happy with great memories.
It's just been an year since your husband passed away,it will take time for you to settle down and make peace with the situation.

The bestest of best,When you have Allah swt with you all the time,who else do you need?
those who care and care best for you,will land to your door themselves.You dont need people around you who make life miserable.
You need peace now.

All best wishes for you,don't feel alone and you won't be alone.