Whenever I visit them, it seems like all of them are observing me, noticing my every move and mood. They don’t like the way I dress or my preference for music or the kind of food I like. I bet they laugh behind my back because I put ketchup in/on everything. Last time I got a comment on my chapals and the one before on my exceptionally long hair. Most probably they talk about my sanwalee skin … Ok KALI skin and as I probably do have an accent the younger ones find it very funny.
But you know what? I DON’T CARE. The last time one of them tried to find out how much I make, I told them enough to keep me happy. When they enquired about studies, I told them knowledge is a lifetime struggle. None of their nosy comments bother me a bit. It is one of those cultural things you learn to live with. And I believe most men have never thought twice about such questions or keen observations.
Now, why is nosy judging in-laws such an issue with desi women?
Um, it is a valid argument that frequency of nosiness might be a factor but I know women who live in another country and still complain about their in-laws asking too many questions when they visit.
Just imagine living with them 24/7... see men dont realize what women have to go thru. Especially if her in-laws are like yours. It would be like hell.
Why do you think they feel this way about you? didn't they see you when you were getting married to their daughter, your looks, style , taste should not even be an issue at this point?? Although some people are just very happy to please.. if you are happy the way you are and your wife is happy thats all that should matter. :)
It is a desi thing...I have my aunt and uncle visiting from India. They feel no hesitation within 5 minutes of our first meeting asking " so..You must be getting a good package" I said, "package"? "haan.." they reply... "kitney miljaate hain finance mein?...apney cousin koh koi posting karvaadey apni compny mein"..
Usually after these conversations, I ask them to send me their kid's resume and once received I proceed to pose questions to my couin, so what makes you want to enter hte world of banking, what is your experience etc etc...to which I am often told.."joh bhi miljata hay Theek hai"
I promptly tell him that he needs to do anothr advanced degree a phd in something or another because he is not ready to grow up.
its a desi thing i reckon... i usually ignore such things too. Well my inlaws are sweet people so ive not heard anything from them... but i guess we just gotta grow a back bone and tolerate such remarks..
haha ab aap bhaRi ho gai hain..start rationalizing yourself :-) You don't let ppl run all over you, nobody taught me that :-p
Respecting other's space and privacy is simple courtesy.
(an innocent damad Ji complaining)
