Re: My fiance is from back home....
*so just incase she cant find anyone again she should just say yes? * She is only 20!
Agree.. talk about desperate..
Re: My fiance is from back home....
you said "yes" for your dad. Marry him now for your "dad."
If you are having second thoughts, means you lied to your dad, gave him false hope and happiness, no one is to be blamed but you. And now you are not so sure about it. Ah women.
Re: My fiance is from back home....
i wouldnt follow the advice given by the poster above me....err just cuz you lied to your dad doesnt mean you should ruin your whole life...just cuz you stole once doesnt mean you're a thief and now you can only pursue that career...stealing for the rest of your life..
kids make mistake...especially when it comes to matters like these. i say, you're 20...take it easy...tell em you're not really thinking about marriage at all yet and wouldnt like to be approached till you're 25 or so..and yes at 25 you'll consider marrying...so now you have five years. get choppin..find your prince charming...so u dont have to marry the cuzzo in five yrs. its ok to be a bit sneaky...psh this is your life!! also make sure u choose a good guy..dont screw urself over.
U need to think about Wat u gonna do who u gonna kid urself, if u don't love don't marry him u r ruining so many life's, u will only end up being miserable
Re: My fiance is from back home....
But I have made the decision now.. I'll stay cos I broke his heart once by saying no 4 years ago.......... now I said yes and he thinks I love him and everything... but i did it for his and my families happiness. At the end of the day I should be with someone who loves me right?
no offense, but you're crazy! you said on here in so many words, at least 3 times, that you don't want to be with him and don't like him as a potential husband
don't say yes just because you don't want to hurt his feelings- please see reason and understand how silly that is
it'll hurt his feelings more when you're married and very unhappy with him
Re: My fiance is from back home....
This is such a tricky situation. Doing anything to make your parents happy is a very selfless act. But at the same time you have to think about yourself as well. Down the track if a relationship with this dude makes you unhappy your parents will realise this and regret this decision as well.
Still though you say this paki guy is obsessed with you, and inshaAllah i hope that means that he will be obsessed with making you happy as well.
I hope things work out okay for you :)
Re: My fiance is from back home....
Why don't you go with your "misery" to the Lord Almighty and ask him while you pray "Oh lord, I'm weak and I'm in such and such position, please help me as I don't know how to handle the situation"...You will get an answer. The answer will be that the situation will develop into a relationship ending in a marriage or in different, seperate ways, each of you going his own.
Why am I tellling you this is that in the same way I approached my Lord and told him that I'm weak and I'm thinking to leave my wife as we don't seem to get along. I said to him, dear Lord please show a sign to me for I don't want to take a step I later on will regret. The same day I met a friend in the Mosque and we started having a chat about life. I mentioned him situation and the first thing he said was a clear cut NO. This is not a option. I was overwhelmed and realized that Allah had heard my weak human being.
I leave you with this verse and wish you all the best:
And when My servants ask thee about Me, say: ‘I am near. I answer the prayer of the supplicant when he prays to Me. So they should hearken to Me and believe in Me, that they may follow the right way.’ (2:187)
Re: My fiance is from back home....
little girl, you both are too young to get involved in such worries.
If you talk to your father I’m sure if he loves you he will understand, come on guys this the 21 century it’s not like it used to be u can talk openly to your parents theses day. Talk to him 
Re: My fiance is from back home…
**
I have gone through same situation 2years bak (I am living in Muscat) … my parents insisted me so much that i said yes for my 10 years older Mamu’s son (in Pakistan) {i was 20 & he was 30}… since childhood I consider him as my bro (as i dont have real 1)
I wasn’t happy at all … for two year I was engaged to him … & then 1day my parents asked to me about wedding date bt I told that I dont wanna get marry to my cousin … uffffffff lotz of drama started at hme … emotional blackmailing … bt I took strong stand
I talked to my cousin as well & he was like “after 2 years your saying this”
Finally I broke up … No1 at hme talked 2 me for months…
bt
parents r parents … they neva stop loving U … Now everythg is bak to normal
****mughalprincess9 ****If you want to live happily … you have to take a step … I hope you make a ryt decision **
Re: My fiance is from back home....
you must tell your father politely about your choice so that next time they keep that in mind ;)
Re: My fiance is from back home....
HEY UPDATE FOR EVERYONE
I HAVE LEFT HIM... HE TURNED OUT TO BE REALLLY BAD, DISGUSTING AND SHAMEFUL ACTUALLY. EVEN MY PARENTS HAVE BACKED OFF :)
ALLAH HU AKBAR.
Re: My fiance is from back home....
HEY UPDATE FOR EVERYONE
I HAVE LEFT HIM... HE TURNED OUT TO BE REALLLY BAD, DISGUSTING AND SHAMEFUL ACTUALLY. EVEN MY PARENTS HAVE BACKED OFF :)
ALLAH HU AKBAR.
congratz, sister, please pray two rakah of shukranay kay nafal.
Re: My fiance is from back home....
Confused much. He is from back home.. ehmmm Pakistan. I'm born and bred in the UK. He is my cousin and he is two years younger than me. I'm 20 and he is 18. He is my khalas and chahus son. get the relationship. Anyway.... EVERYONE has been wanting us to get married and stuff... i said no first because of the negative stereo typification of boys back home.. the pervy type. But I just came back from pak a month ago and all his fam convinced me to say yes and I have. He is over the moon. He is like obsessed with me. I like him.. but dont love him... I need time. When I was in pak... I was all in the mood and said yes.. but now that I'm back I kind of want to have a choice of saying no.. cos I really did it for my family... I've never had a boyfriend or anything.... and I don't like anyone else.. its just that he is not what I wanted.... I guess you can say not my type. I don't wanna hurt his feelings but I dont wanna be with him. my parents love me and would never force me but now that i have said yes it would break their hearts. esp my dads. He is my world and my life! I could never upset him. When i said yes.... he cried to my mum and thanked Allah. Should I just go along?
thanks
He's pretty dramatic for an 18 year old. I understand your sentiments.
Re: My fiance is from back home....
HEY UPDATE FOR EVERYONE
I HAVE LEFT HIM... HE TURNED OUT TO BE REALLLY BAD, DISGUSTING AND SHAMEFUL ACTUALLY. EVEN MY PARENTS HAVE BACKED OFF :)
ALLAH HU AKBAR.
What happened?
Re: My fiance is from back home....
I prayed Nafl and am very happy now, I feel free. Alhamdullilah, even though it ended in a not so nice way, it has ended and the chapter of our marriage has been closed and burned :). BUT the misery, he is coming to the UK pretty soon and shall live with me and family whether we hate eachother or not. Oh well, I've gone through worse. It will actually give me an excuse to really change him into a 'brother'. Allah Hu Akbar.
Re: My fiance is from back home....
Change him from what, Princess?
Re: My fiance is from back home....
how did it happen ???
Re: My fiance is from back home....
I prayed Nafl and am very happy now, I feel free. Alhamdullilah, even though it ended in a not so nice way, it has ended and the chapter of our marriage has been closed and burned :). BUT the misery, he is coming to the UK pretty soon and shall live with me and family whether we hate eachother or not. Oh well, I've gone through worse. It will actually give me an excuse to really change him into a 'brother'. Allah Hu Akbar.
been reading ur story.. well it's gonna be hard as he will be living with ur family. be strong and carefree :) gd luck!
Re: My fiance is from back home....
what did you find out about him .. what did he do ? ..