Re: EDAL’s thread
The posters (yes, even the Guppans) did not disagree with every single point that Edal made. It was the double standards that people had objections about. He believes that a wife SHOULD be a virgin…even though he himself was not a virgin at the time of marriage. Then he (rather defensively) put fort the argument that even in the West…people look down on women if they are promiscuous. The point is…it doesn’t matter what double standards desi or western society has. Allah has prohibited zina for BOTH men and women. That can’t be debated or argued. And the view that a virgin woman will most definitely make a good wife…that’s a weak argument as well. The OP did not take into account exceptions.
And, Soni, I don’t agree with the attitude that we should surrender because “all the pakistani guys feel this way”. That’s a weak argument as well. There’s a difference between a cultural view and a view that is supported by Islam. And they are not always mutually exclusive. A popular cultural view among desi guys might be that there wife must be very pure and untouched even if they themselves are not virgin…BUT…Islam does not support this view. So, do we just put up with the popular cultural attitude…or …do we try our best as Muslims to follow the rules and principles in Islam? We can either blindly follow the ignorant ways of our desi society and uphold the same jaahil and unIslamic views as our elders (relatives, in-laws, etc)…or we can try to make a positive change at the individual level.
Oh and…nope…that’s a generalization on your part, Soni. Not all Paki guys feel the same way. There were some guppies who disagreed with Edal’s views and found them to be preposterous.