Re: My dads new wife...help.
Well I admit im young and I dont have a lot life experience and i think little bit childiss, but really why shouldnt i talk disrespectful about her to strangers, when she talks disrespectful towards me front of my friends and family? And thats the thing, she always says that I should clean in my moms house and week-ends in my dads house when im there. She always says that my mom isnt raising us girls well, because she thinks we cant cook anything or clean. And she always says that I dont do anything, like how does she know, because I dont live with her? So thats so strange, and I earn little over 1400 pounds(GBP), because I work part-time in week-days and full time in week-ends, and she said that I shouldnt spend that money all to my self (im not spending money, im saving over 900 pounds in month for future like my dad and mom suggested, and I pay my own bills) that my dad has raised me so i should give to THEM 2/3 of my salary, and I have been working and paying my bills at age 16 and of course I give **to my dad** money if he need or ask, but he would never take money from me, even if** I insist**, because my dad is typical man that he wants to provide his family and he said himself that he would feel so small if he have to ask money from his children, and that was hard thing for him when i wanted to pay my own bills.
And my step mom always speaks those things front of everyone, and I dont think its friendly advice if she laughs and make fun of me? And that thing when she said that she thinks that "man shouldnt see so often his kids after kids are over 10 and he shouldnt buy them anything if he is divorced", she said that in my aunts place to my aunt, when there was in same room me, my 11 year old little brother, and our cousins, so I dont know is she stupid or does she really want upset us. And I havent said that I dont want them to have children, I just hope that she wont ask my dad then choose between them and us.
My little brother doesn't want to go week-ends in my dads place, he hasn't say that is she the reason. My little sister and brother doesn't understand completely or speak completely Urdu, so if she says something bad to them, they dont understand all and im glad about that.
And what comes to my moms and dads friendship, I meant that they are good friends, like they can talk without fighting things which are concern about us children, like they dont go out together or anything and they see only then when we are around. And I think its really good thing to have both mom, and dad, who are not fighting and can come both same time to graduation party etc. And My aunt and uncles are known my mom 22 years like I said and they are friends, and my mom doesnt come parties unless they are big thing, like when my aunt got her first child and our granny passed away few years ago, so she didn't had mom to support and giving her advices, so of course my mom was closest to her, she was 7 years old when my mom and dad got married. And I dont even want my mom and dad get married again, so thats not the point, because when they were married they argued alot and thats why they divorced, and i know either of them doesnt think anything else that friendship. And like I said I wanted to my dad get re-married, because he lived in weekdays alone, and i thought i would be safer to him also to someone live with him.
Thanks for replays, and advices:) I dont know yet what to do...and i have now so much work and studies, thats good because I dont have time to think about this situation and I dont want to do anything what i will regret so time is friend now.
i'm really sorry Girlieee for what u r going through. going through parental divorce after staying together for so long can't be easy for anyone. after reading ur second post maybe ur stepmom is quite irrational and keep grudge against u kids. but being disrespectful in return and starting a war won't do anything good. also if u talk to ur dad he would def question her and she would become even more spiteful n revengeful. So best thing for u is just to be patient and ignore her silly ccomments. when u go to dad's place just stick around with dad. don't stay alone with her. try to plan something out ahead of time so u ppl get to go out with dad like for shopping, movies, walks, etc instead of staying home. if she still gets too much on ur nerves may be tell her one day bluntly "please i respect u but i come here just to meet my dad and i do hav a mom so don't try to be my mom" . "u r not my mom" method does always work best with stepmoms :)
