And I have refused, giving reasons so that she can understand. How would you deal with it?
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
when I was your daughters age up to the age of 16 I used to cry, sulk, shout, pretend to run away just to go to sleepovers. My parents NEVER let me go even if I cried the whole night.
When I hit 16 I understood where they were coming from and lost all interest in it.
I am glad they did what they did.
When I was 18 I moved away to uni for years - it was like a sleep over every night for 6 years!
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
i never went to one.. they wont either. boy or girl.. neither of em. they can go and do whatever they do at each others homes.. but sleep is for ones own home.
my mom was so funny bout this..
mom i want to sleep over too plzzzzz
kiu.. kabhi kissi ko sotha hua nahi dekha? if you want.. come to my bedroom and watch me sleep
me: 
leave room
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
Just say NO and be prepared for the frustration and anger.
It's for the best. She should eventually understand and appreciate your decision like inspiron said.
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
The thing is, I was never invited to sleepovers at that age. I was told that this was and still is, an English/American custom that kids do as part of growing up. They need their circle of friends and should be given some independance. I don't agree. You don't need to send your pubescent daughter to an English girl's home for a sleepover just to blend in with her circle and get some freedom/independence.
I have explained that eating and drinking from a kafir's house, especially where there is dirty meat, probably loose immoral talk and chit chat amongst the adults there is not a good environment for my daughter. I don't think that English people have the best regard to personal hygiene when using the toilets and it is with these hands that they touch everything. I have brought up my kids to keep themselves 'paak'. Being in school, this is not always possible.
I have explained this to her as well as the fact that anything can happen. I have offered her a compromise, i.e a movie at our house with some mates around or we all go to see a movie.
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
I think your explanation may be beyond her understanding.
In ALL honesty if my parents gave me the one you gave I would find it hmmmmmmmmm frustrating. It gives mixed signals. Its too much for a 13 year old. Its too much for my 24 year old ears lol
Just say NO and stick to it.
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
Wow heer. That is some heavy and not so nice stuff to say bout ones friends..... I would have just said it goes against our home rules......
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
She is 13, she understands but doesn't want to accept it. I have to give a reason for saying no. I can't just say NO and expect her to deal with it.
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
^ My parents just said no - its against our rules and that was that!
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
Heer, if he can't accept it, she doesn't really understand. I know you feel bad just saying no but that is how our parents did it and it worked and we all understood why later.
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
The thing is, I was never invited to sleepovers at that age. I was told that this was and still is, an English/American custom that kids do as part of growing up. They need their circle of friends and should be given some independance. I don't agree. You don't need to send your pubescent daughter to an English girl's home for a sleepover just to blend in with her circle and get some freedom/independence.
I have explained that eating and drinking from a kafir's house, especially where there is dirty meat, probably loose immoral talk and chit chat amongst the adults there is not a good environment for my daughter. I don't think that English people have the best regard to personal hygiene when using the toilets and it is with these hands that they touch everything. I have brought up my kids to keep themselves 'paak'. Being in school, this is not always possible.
I have explained this to her as well as the fact that anything can happen. I have offered her a compromise, i.e a movie at our house with some mates around or we all go to see a movie.
Not to sound rude,but what will you do if she wants to go to a sleepover to a Muslim kid's house?I just do not think the explanation of them being kaafir and immoral is an explanation I would give to my daughter.I live in a non-Musim country,I deal with these people on a daily basis and so does my kid.How far will I be able to take this reasoning?
That being said,sleep overs are a no no for my kid,whether boy or girl.When I was growing up,I was not invited to sleep overs but there was other stuff like overnight college trips or BD parties at class mates' places etc etc.My mother had made it a point that I cannot go except for a few where she knew the other parents personally.I knew it and never fussed over it.Say 'no' and just say it s not right.She might get angry and frustrated but that is a part of her age.
:)
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
Why don't you take her camping along with your other kids instead of going all Bin Laden on her?
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
^ I don't know many 13 year old girls who would see that as a good trade.
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
I remember when I was 15ish nearly 16, My friend had a large sleep over with 10 other girls for her 16th.
My parents let me stay until 12am and then came to pick up. I was happy with the compromise.
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
Why don't you take her camping along with your other kids instead of going all Bin Laden on her?
Hareem what I have noticed about your comments in the past is that you are always rude. You're not being funny, failing dismally more like. #
I am not going Bin Laden on her. I am simply telling my kid that English people have a different lifestyle to us Muslims and many things they do behind closed doors are not how we operate. So what if I said they are kafirs?
They are.
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
^ I don't know many 13 year old girls who would see that as a good trade.
What do you mean by that stoppit? You mean a compromise?
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
It really scares me when I see parents teaching their kids hatred. As others have said, there is no need to bring this "kafir speech" in when you're talking to your kids. There are a lot of muslims parents who lack morals and there are a lot of "kafir" parents who have morals and manners and they don't swear or drink in front of their kids. I don't really care if you find this rude but I'm sorry I just can't stand when people use irrationality with their kids.
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
Heer I think it gives kids mixed signals to encourage them to dislike people they are friends with, go to school with and will have to work with.
Its really hard to understand and accept for a young mind.
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
I have seen this girl and her mum who has invited my kid for this sleepover. I don't feel that her home environment is one where I'd like my kid to spend the night. First impressions lasts and count for a lot.
Re: My 13 year old daughter wants to go for a sleepover.
Its fine you dont like her - but I dont think you should justify this with dislike for the family.