Mutah [temporary marriage] -- Social and cultural perspective

[Code_Red]

Re: Mutah [temporary marriage] in the time of Amir ul Momineen Ali ibn Abi Talib

@PyariCgudia

Marriage is not difficult or costly. We’ve made it as such, and therefore, we need to fix that problem before we go ruining women’s lives (as usual) to satisfy male desires.

You don’t see women running after muta’a. Its practiced pretty much only in Iraq by a minority and they’re male. I’d like to know what kind of muta’a they’re practicing and if they’re even adhering to the early guidelines of it.

You don’t need money to get married - desis need to get over themselves and do a plain nikkah in a masjid (no cost for a hall!). In fact, the cost of a hall and of food saved can be used to pay for personal things like dresses and jewelry. ( :halo: ). You can have a small wedding where you invite 20-30 people. There’s no need to invite everyone and anyone you haven’t seen since you were born.

As for long years of study, maybe its time our desi culture starts opening up to possibilities of marriage DURING schooling. I mean, its completely possible to wait for marriage until after your bachelor’s. If you can’t hold it, then the system doesn’t need changing. YOU need changing.

** Hormones can be controlled. Most people manage it. However, part of this frustration isn’t due to late marriages, but strict social guidelines **- you can’t even have a bloody conversation with a boy without the entire mohallah calling you a whore. This has to change. Women and men conversed and socialized all the time in the Prophet’s day within reason, and there is no sign that unmarried men and women couldn’t TALK. Dating is different, talking is different. Thankfully, Pakistani society is not as sexually repressed as some arab societies.

** Peer pressure of being in relationships - again - you want to change the system FOR people who don’t follow it in the first place? These people’s behaviors should be changed, not the system of allowing women the right to not deal with muta’as.** So people want to bully one another, and now you’re ready to subject women to not being respected as normal wives and being subjected to marriages that come with an expiration date, because of TEENAGER IMMATURITY?

I hope you realize that muta’a is less of a picnic for women than for men. Its an open door to an unstable life for a woman, which I’m pretty sure, God tried to protect us against in the first place, as is clear by CLEAR AS DAY Quranic verses.

Hmmm. Interesting arguments :k:

You have provided alternate sollution (bold text of your post) to streamline the behavioral inconsistensies of our social outlook… Which means that you acknowledge their existance in our society and culture

I give you an example. In irrigation system, ( particularly here in pakistan ) There are two types of canals :

1. Normal irrigation canal
2. Flood water canal

The first type is used all year around during different times according to the need of farmers. They second one is opened only when there is flood in rivers.

The first is ‘normal’ and ‘desired’ outlet of water and if should be used in normal circumstances. But the second is for extreme cases. Just to save the entire populations of towns and villages.

Now your sollutions are viable but unlikely that anyone would pay any heeds to them. Not even the youngsters themselves.

Honestly tell me how many of your peers would respond positively to the idea fo nuptual ( marraige ) during studies ? how many cases you have seen where guy and girls got married in early 20s on their own ? Do you think that marraige in this early age is a good idea while living in west ? Are these young folk mentally and emotionally ready to handle the complexities of long term relationship ?

.