I’d let him do it now! Then this bloke as to taste hell. Will be a great reality show on Hell Reality TV!
I'd let him do it now! Then this bloke as to taste hell. Will be a great reality show on Hell Reality TV!
Yaar.....Pendo........the chap says he know of other more legal/halal ways to get sex.
I'm guessing he means temporary marriage also known as Mutaa. It's basically a marriage where both parties understand that the marriage is temporary or short-term. And I vaguely remember reading that this practice was allowed once and then it was banned by the Prophet SAWS....as commonly believed by Sunnis. Shias have a different stance on the matter. It's been a source of debate between both sects.
Yaar.....Pendo........the chap says he know of other more legal/halal ways to get sex.
I'm guessing he means temporary marriage also known as Mutaa. It's basically a marriage where both parties understand that the marriage is temporary or short-term. And I vaguely remember reading that this practice was allowed once and then it was banned by the Prophet SAWS.
Yea mutaa was a Pre-Islamic practice. It was practiced by arabs who used to marry their sisters or their mothers over matters of land or over bets. I know that the shia claim that Mutaa is allowed in Quran but i haven't read it anywhere so im going with it being outdated because Quran says that 4 marriages are allowed. Mutaa would be haram. If this guy follows his desires he will indeed end up in a the deep void he wont be able to climb out. If this "Chap" of his listens to us or at least has the guts to read the translation of the Quran he'd think twice.
Yea mutaa was a Pre-Islamic practice. It was practiced by arabs who used to marry their sisters or their mothers over matters of land or over bets. I know that the shia claim that Mutaa is allowed in Quran but i haven't read it anywhere so im going with it being outdated because Quran says that 4 marriages are allowed. Mutaa would be haram. If this guy follows his desires he will indeed end up in a the deep void he wont be able to climb out. If this "Chap" of his listens to us or at least has the guts to read the translation of the Quran he'd think twice.
If the Mutaa agreement is mutual between both parties, it's one thing. However the idea of telling a woman that you intend to marry her temporarily and only for sex...........leaves a bad taste. It reduces the woman to an object. But if she agrees to it.......well, that's her deciion.
If all marriages were treated as temporary by people......to be broken after a short time.........I imagine society would become chaotic. Because it's not impossible for one or both parties to start becoming emotionally attached in the "temporary union".......which has the potential to leave emotional scars. And what if children are born? The father is obligated to support his children financially............but is it healthy for the children of this "temporary union" to eventually be raised predominantly by a single parent...........because "daddy" is far away getting jiggy with other women/wives and is not a full-time parent?
If the Mutaa agreement is mutual between both parties, it's one thing. However the idea of telling a woman that you intend to marry her temporarily and only for sex...........leaves a bad taste. It reduces the woman to an object. But if she agrees to it.......well, that's her deciion.
If all marriages were treated as temporary by people......to be broken after a short time.........I imagine society would become chaotic. Because it's not impossible for one or both parties to start becoming emotionally attached in the "temporary union".......which has the potential to leave emotional scars. And what if children are born? The father is obligated to support his children financially............but is it healthy for the children of this "temporary union" to eventually be raised predominantly by a single parent...........because "daddy" is far away getting jiggy with other women/wives and is not a full-time parent?
That is what makes us humans unique. We take responsibility for our actions. Unlike animals who are completely oblivious to their surroundings or their actions. I mean humans fall in love with just one glance. Imagine the devastation a sentient and rational woman would feel when you just have sex with her and leave her? If "chap" here has any respect for women he should never raise his eye to a woman until he's married!
People often don’t even think about the kids in these situations. Kids from temporary marriages are going to grow up prob never knowing their father but who cares, right, cos at least the sex was halal 
An Arab friend of mine was telling me that a lot of men actually use temporary marriage as a means of making time they spend with prostitutes halal. There are parties in London where the girls are handed envelopes of money, go off to have sex and this is all done under the umbrella of misyar..
In societies where polygyny is more accepted and widely practised families tend to become fragmented (rich husbands often decide to ‘trade in’ wife no.4 for a newer model when they get bored) and I’ve seen the effects it has on the kids, they often end up bitter and resentful..If everyone is ok with the arrangement (yes there are wives out there who actually encourage their husband to take another wife) I don’t think it’s a bad thing but I still find it quite hypocritical us Muslims like to bleat on about how messed up Western society has become due to single mothers bringing up kids on their own etc and then we go on to promote a system that effectively makes those previous wives (with their kids) live a similar lifestyle with a father figure there only 50% (at the most) of the time…
I can’t imagine myself being able to look after teenage sons without their dad around to guide them. I wonder what happens when kids from one partner get ill or get into trouble at school or need extra attention from dad for some other reason but he’s supposed to spend the exact same time with each wife and family… Sounds like it could get messy..
Well maybe our stud is alredy cautious bout protection, honesty, & legal loophole chick issuez.
Besides, So many people out there do this stuff, I dont get why my dude just for being honest and straight-up is being gunned.
Maybe chap knows of men who 'did dere stuff' in the past and now contentfully settled with the virgin chori.
He mite be aware of his too compelling perkiness and gets worried by seeing threads of those cheating married men.
Maybe our chap wants to be loyal to his future wife but also understands himself and was thinking of a kind of comprimise.
RV has defintly come down too harsh. Rite she made the intersting comment that- chap inspite doing the 'yoyo' now, will still wanna do it 'after' marriage.
So what should chappie do? Optimum Scenario - he guarded his 'yoyo' now, wud his future wife i.e one of u guppan types, allow him the 2nd, 3rd or 4th wife?
Million dollar question.
Wud you allow him to be Deela?
Re: Mutaa (split from Promiscuity thread)
I think chap doing any sort of hanky panky before/after marriage with anyone aside from wife is kind of...yucky.
Now, if the woman is really evil...she may let him do what he wants to do, "catch" him in the act, divorce him and take him for all he is worth.
Here are general examples:
1) You're in the workplace......or maybe you're applying for a job. You know your accomplishments that you have worked hard for. You are a person of honesty and integrity living in a world that you know is not always fair. On your resume you mention your qualifications and your accomplishments honestly. But perhaps you don't get the job. And the job instead end up going to someone who shamelessly LIED on their resume. I'm not talking about a little fib or white lie or slight exaggeration here and there............I mean the person TOTALLY MADE STUFF UP. Maybe the individual was fired for being incompetent and unprofessional in his last job. But anyhow.........he ends up getting the job........whereas you go back to your job hunt in this struggling economy.
2) Or perhaps..........you see someone at work who keeps getting "ahead" by playing dirty. He doesn't do any of the work.........steals other people's ideas and passes them off as his own...........while those who work their butts of sincerely are not being recongnized quickly.
3) Or maybe you're a student who feels frustrated knowing that some individuals are getting easily accepted into schools when they have lied on their applications about their accomplishments or plus points..........where you've tried to stay true to yourself.
The person who is cheating may eventually get caught somehwere down the line. He/she will get what they deserve either in this world or the next. If you NEVER did any hard work or participated in noble activities.............and then you lie about it..........you're not used to doing that kind of work. So......when someone asks you do handle such responsibilities..........you might not live up to the expectations. Whereas someone who has good ethics from the start is more reliable and competent. What goes around comes around. If the foundation of your career/goal/venture/ is one that is built on dishonesty.......it'll come back to you eventually.
So.......why should one continue to be honest? Because we as humans would like to believe that there STILL **is some decency, some honesty, some sense of shame, some sense of humility left in the world today. **It's hypocritical of us to complain that others have no morals............if we ourselves give-up on doing what is right. If we're going to cheat ourselves...............why complain if somebody else has cheated us? If there is even the SMALLEST BIT **of good left in this twisted world today........................the credit goes to those FEW INDIVIDUALS who persist against their lower desires to prove to people that GOODNESS has value and that it hasn't become extinct. It is these FEW PEOPLE who serve as examples to others.......................and maybe some people have followed in their positive footsteps.**
****************** So, it is pathetic to complain, "Why do I have to bother avoiding premarital sex when so many good virgin girls are marrying non-virgin guys. If the guys can get the SAME GOODS either legally or illegall..........then why should I make the effort to keep it in my pants?"**
^^^ THE FIRST MISTAKE: DO NOT REFER TO WOMEN AS "GOODS" EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! UNLESS YOU WANT YOUR OWN GOODS KICKED!
The word "GOODS" refers to MATERIAL ITEMS and OBJECTS.............NOT HUMAN BEINGS. Any guy who calls a woman "goods" DOES NOT have respect for women and is reducing them to objects. He can claim to be a loyal and nice and respectful guy who will treat women nicely. But his true attitude toward women is seeping out in his vocabulary. Has his sexual frustration overwhelmed him to the point that he can't even manage decent vocabulary for the species he so badly wants to hump? Has he become that weak and fallen that low? And the excuse that one can be casual in their choice of words on a public forum is inexcusable. People form impressions with their choice of language. And no female (some random chick, your wife, your girlfriend, your sister, your mother) would have respect for a man who sees her as "goods." So............correct your attitude about women...........before deciding to hump them either before marriage or after marriage.
And now to answer the question. So why should one remain virgin if the non-virgins are ending up with pure spouses in the end? For the same reason that many others choose to go about their daily life in an HONEST way while being fully aware that the dishonest are getting ahead. These people are leaders.........not followers. They KNOW the importance of being positive examples. And ultimately they do what is right because it's the principle that counts. They know they have the option of joining the evil-doers and getting ahead like them.............................BUT they decide to go about the more challenging but honorable path in life. Because **SOMEONE **has to leave some goodness behind to hope for.
And if ONE cannot understand even that simple concept...........one is truly lost. It's like a kid whining to his parents, "But the other kids are lying, cheating.........why can't I do that?"** Why should we even bother teaching character and moral values to our children and students..........................if EVERY SINGLE PERSON in the world is going to have the attitude that "I'll get the goods illegally."** We teach these values in the hopes that at least few people will learn the message and carry it forward.
Some things are so simple that they don't require an essay of a post to understand. But for those whose minds are locked and internal frustrations are taking priority over their conscience and ability to reason.....................no length of post...........no amount of answers...........no amount of opinions........will ever be enough.
Re: Mutaa (split from Promiscuity thread)
Nutwer, it’s really sweet of you to support Dheela. Maybe you can offer Dheela some support since you both seem to be of the SAME EXACT mind. YOU…and ONLY YOU…can understand him. :halo:
By the way, this is Pendu’s thread on Mutaa. And now YOU are asking the same question that Deela asked: Would ladies be okay with their husbands having multiple wives to fulfill sexual urges?
What a great friend you are…for persisting with Deela’s question on his behalf…I’m guessing.
Re: Mutaa (split from Promiscuity thread)
Here are general examples:
1) You're in the workplace......or maybe you're applying for a job. You know your accomplishments that you have worked hard for. You are a person of honesty and integrity living in a world that you know is not always fair. On your resume you mention your qualifications and your accomplishments honestly. But perhaps you don't get the job. And the job instead end up going to someone who shamelessly LIED on their resume. I'm not talking about a little fib or white lie or slight exaggeration here and there............I mean the person TOTALLY MADE STUFF UP. Maybe the individual was fired for being incompetent and unprofessional in his last job. But anyhow.........he ends up getting the job........whereas you go back to your job hunt in this struggling economy.
2) Or perhaps..........you see someone at work who keeps getting "ahead" by playing dirty. He doesn't do any of the work.........steals other people's ideas and passes them off as his own...........while those who work their butts of sincerely are not being recongnized quickly.
3) Or maybe you're a student who feels frustrated knowing that some individuals are getting easily accepted into schools when they have lied on their applications about their accomplishments or plus points..........where you've tried to stay true to yourself.
The person who is cheating may eventually get caught somehwere down the line. He/she will get what they deserve either in this world or the next. If you NEVER did any hard work or participated in noble activities.............and then you lie about it..........you're not used to doing that kind of work. So......when someone asks you do handle such responsibilities..........you might not live up to the expectations. Whereas someone who has good ethics from the start is more reliable and competent. What goes around comes around. If the foundation of your career/goal/venture/ is one that is built on dishonesty.......it'll come back to you eventually.
So.......why should one continue to be honest? Because we as humans would like to believe that there STILL **is some decency, some honesty, some sense of shame, some sense of humility left in the world today. **It's hypocritical of us to complain that others have no morals............if we ourselves give-up on doing what is right. If we're going to cheat ourselves...............why complain if somebody else has cheated us? If there is even the SMALLEST BIT **of good left in this twisted world today........................the credit goes to those FEW INDIVIDUALS who persist against their lower desires to prove to people that GOODNESS has value and that it hasn't become extinct. It is these FEW PEOPLE who serve as examples to others.......................and maybe some people have followed in their positive footsteps.**
---Lady I know im Nutwer. And i comprehand the honesty and leadership issues. But da real thang is, 'great things' are easier said than done. And to be honest your line i underlined bout 'hypocrisy', well avary body has limits to tolerance, patience, hardwork. SO mcuh else is ging on our lives lady. And da thang that pisses guys like maself and bro pendu da most is when decent girl like YOU, are freely giving themself to those 'players/losers addresed. IT IS SICK! And talking bout us few individuals lady, its not fun being left as the standbuyer watchers. People who resist thier damself from thier desires do it for a reason . And it is stressful resisting things you need. That is lost enerygy that could be used elesewhere - i.e advancing your career which u chicks like.
****************** So, it is pathetic to complain, "Why do I have to bother avoiding premarital sex when so many good virgin girls are marrying non-virgin guys. If the guys can get the SAME GOODS either legally or illegall..........then why should I make the effort to keep it in my pants?"**
No its not pathetic. Everybody is different. Sorry bout this but men have been created for sex, its a part of mans nature, are those who will not and are resisting thier instincts-like any resisting any other instincts will be problematic. Various people have various ways of coping. But what is natural is natural.
^^^ THE FIRST MISTAKE: DO NOT REFER TO WOMEN AS "GOODS" EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! UNLESS YOU WANT YOUR OWN GOODS KICKED!
The word "GOODS" refers to MATERIAL ITEMS and OBJECTS.............NOT HUMAN BEINGS. Any guy who calls a woman "goods" DOES NOT have respect for women and is reducing them to objects. He can claim to be a loyal and nice and respectful guy who will treat women nicely. But his true attitude toward women is seeping out in his vocabulary. Has his sexual frustration overwhelmed him to the point that he can't even manage decent vocabulary for the species he so badly wants to hump? Has he become that weak and fallen that low? And the excuse that one can be casual in their choice of words on a public forum is inexcusable. People form impressions with their choice of language. And no female (some random chick, your wife, your girlfriend, your sister, your mother) would have respect for a man who sees her as "goods." So............correct your attitude about women...........before deciding to hump them either before marriage or after marriage.
Apologiez for any offence felt. 'good's was used by my humorus style only in order to make things clearer. Nutwer understands, and reassures u does not think of women as objects.
And now to answer the question. So why should one remain virgin if the non-virgins are ending up with pure spouses in the end? For the same reason that many others choose to go about their daily life in an HONEST way while being fully aware that the dishonest are getting ahead. These people are leaders.........not followers. They KNOW the importance of being positive examples. And ultimately they do what is right because it's the principle that counts. They know they have the option of joining the evil-doers and getting ahead like them.............................BUT they decide to go about the more challenging but honorable path in life. Because **SOMEONE **has to leave some goodness behind to hope for.
Alrite, lady so Nutwer and co, and co should be leaders. wow lady your a braveheart. Is no such exists such as envy or jealousy in the world? Nevertheless maybe some do like continuing as leaders but still find the world influencing.
-and You definitly watch too much movies.
And if ONE cannot understand even that simple concept...........one is truly lost. It's like a kid whining to his parents, "But the other kids are lying, cheating.........why can't I do that?"** Why should we even bother teaching character and moral values to our children and students..........................if EVERY SINGLE PERSON in the world is going to have the attitude that "I'll get the goods illegally."** We teach these values in the hopes that at least few people will learn the message and carry it forward.
Some things are so simple that they don't require an essay of a post to understand. But for those whose minds are locked and internal frustrations are taking priority over their conscience and ability to reason.....................no length of post...........no amount of answers...........no amount of opinions........will ever be enough.
Yeh,lady nice moral lecture. But you forget = always easier said than done.
Not all complainers want permission. Maybe some are thier for, knowledge, enlightenment or encouragment of some sort.
However BOTTOM LINE IS: Every body has limits to tolerance, everybody in this world is already working thier socks in maintaining in every way halal selfs.
and unfortunetly a big part of us men is you ladies, And as long as YOU DECENT LADIES keep giving yourself those undeserving players, good men WILL feel bad.
Nobody human can maintain total perfectedness.
(Pendu- I understand you top rightoues guy- but me sure you r ditto me)
RV Learn to respect or atleast understand the opposite sex (or pigs commonly addressed).
THIS IS WAR,
Mcpendu im retreating (hiding) for some time---take the baton.
Re: Mutaa (split from Promiscuity thread)
And Yeh I do emptahzize with Deela lady.
However I am not suggestiing him ways doing his things.
Ironically, and if Am i not wrong you suggested a 'THREESOME' earlier on to him?
No im curious RedVelvet, since im new to this world,,,, would you like to explain what you meant by the that?
How do you know bout this?
Wht about a Foursome? Tensome.
Pls do the enlightening.
Waisey this muta thing isnt right, one should makea proper Nikah.
If you’re Sunni you can’t do Mutaa but u can do Misyar marriage instead..
'According to a Fatwa for Ayatollah Sistani, a Shī‘a Shikh, Misyar is permitted, but Mut’ah considered to be prohibited by Sunnis.(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nikah_Misyar#A_comparison_with_Nikah_Mut.E2.80.99ah)
I have reached the conlcusion on Bro Deelas behalf (who must be hanging somwhere nearby), that women do not mind the mans past who is SUCCESFUL.
Virginity is swish swosh for galzz.
following careful analysis I boldly announce, go my fellow boys do the humping u need and rid the frustrations. - followed by by-benefits of no more labeling of pig and perves.
Use the clarity mind to boost yo careers.
GOLDEN RULE EXTRACTED!
GIRLS JUST WANT MEN WHO ARE SUCCESFUL!
(Mods my posts are purely for recreational purposes.)
^ What did I mean by a “threesome”? It’s ridiculous for you you to even ask. Majority of my posts advocated avoiding premarital sex and then you decide to ignore all those and ZERO IN on only the one post about a threesome. It’s a little something called SARCASM, Nutwer. I was being sarcastic. Much to your and Deela’s dismay, I had no intention of encouraging a threesome. Although…I’m sure Nutwer/Deela wouldn’t mind…since your motto seems to, “The more, the merrier.”
“This is WAR”??? Seriously, what are you…in second grade or something? It’s “WAR” to you. That’s what a little kid would say. I’m only pushing for common sense here.
And you’re handing over the “baton” to Mcpendu? What freakin “baton” ? A “baton” is passed to one who will be following your footsteps. And **Mcpendu **himself is not following in your footsteps…he even refuted your ideas from his Sufi perspective…so he has a stronger conscience…he’s not going to waste his time encouraging people to commit evil because he knows it’s wrong. See, not all guys are like you…and you can’t stereotype all of them to be like you.
You know what Nutwer/Deela…I’ll help you “both” out. See, you really don’t need to obtain female permission and approval to behave like a sex-crazed animal. The “permission” has already been given by the Prophet SAWS in the following hadith for people like you:
The Hadith is related by Al-Bukhari on the authority of Abu Mas’ud Uqbah who quotes the Prophet as saying “If you have NO sense of shame, then do WHATEVER you like.”
^ There you go Nutwer/Deela…you both have approval/permission to hump freely…and this time it came with a religious reference…and that too… from the Prophet SAWS. It’s clear that you’re devoid of shame…hence…there’s you’re “green signal”…hump away. :k:
Re: Mutaa (split from Promiscuity thread)
Oh youre posts are for “recreational purposes” ??? LMFAO!!!
Nutty…a recreational activity is one that an individual engages in occassionally or once in a while. BUT YOU ON THE OTHER HAND…are ALWAYS consumed with the topic of sexual urges, polygamous inclinationes, virginity, female opinons regarding chasity, etc. Since this topic is one that you are soooooooo plagued by on a daily basis…it can’t be called a “recreational” activity. It’s called a “sickness”. Playing it off as “recreational” might fool those who are not very observant…but for those who know how consumed you are with this topic…they would KNOW that this ain’t no pastime…and you ain’t no troll…nope you ain’t trolling at all…you’re seriously disturbed about this issue and can’t stop talking about it.
Even a “troll” would know when to quit trolling and playing the fool. Keep it up Nutty…n…“Deela”…eventually people will put two and two together. Sooner or later…what was inteneded to be “separate” will merge into ONE IDEA in people’s minds. 
^ Redvelvet i dont understand one thing is that men would even thing about this kind of activities. First of all, you need to read the translation of the Quran in order to understand its meanings. Now dont give me the nonsense that "Oh in arabic only Quran can be understood. Here is the link for you brain washed mullahs https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBj227G7MNk)
And After you have read it, understand the meaning and surat AL Nisa or Woman in Quran and you’ll get all your answers about humping women and having girlfriends. Surely in Islam sex isn’t prohibited this is not some Jehovah’s Witness Compound you’re living on this is a rational religion which permits sex but it has RULES which govern how you should have it. God clearly states in Surat AL nisa that you must marry women and that you cannot have them as girlfriends or use them as disposable items.
Why would you go on forums and ask girls who probably have no idea what to do they would probably have sex with you if you persuade them. Having sex isn’t difficult especially in western countries but you are not some brain dead guy whos gonna have massive amount of sex and contracts a disease and dies a lonely painful death. You’re a Muslim and as a Muslim you have certain guidelines that you must follow. Its a piety that you parents didn’t teach you enough that you have to come here and ask us. If we are not going to follow our beautiful religion then who will?
^ Pendu, I’m not advocating promiscuity.
I agree with everything you’ve said above. Even if one does not read the Quran with meaning…surely the prohibition of premarital sex is one of those issues where MOST RELIGIOUS are pretty clear about and leave no room for ambiguity.
Plus, if something is pricking or rankling your conscience…then it’s your inner voice telling you that something is not right with your thinking. If a guy is sooooooooo confident about telling the world that strong sexual urges are an innate inclination in me…if he feels soooooo STRONGLY about the issue…if he KNOWS that Allah has allowed him to be polygamous…then why doesn’t he just marry 4 wives then? Why is he waiting for our permission to do something which he knows Allah has given him the permision to do? I BELIEVE that the reason he’s not rushing to be polygamous and exercise that desire to hump multiple partners…is because something in his conscicence is telling him that his mentality about women/marriage/relationships is WRONG. The guy won’t admit it this…he’ll deny it…come up with excuses…but on some level he’s not feeling morally comfortable with his own “polygamous inclinations” otherwise he would go ahead and do it.
And even Allah Himself doesn’t advocate polygamy so freely without an admonition (warning) to men because He says:
“You will not be able to deal equally between (your) wives, however much you wish (to do so)” (4:29).
The above verse warns about the impossibility of being able to treat more than one wife justly and fairly, thereby demonstrating that monogamy is the preferred marital arrangement in the Qur’an.
Source: Suite 101 - How-tos, Inspiration and Other Ideas to Try](Suite 101 - How-tos, Inspiration and Other Ideas to Try)),
I 've never heard of this being practiced in Gulf countries.
It sounds questionable…:hmmm:***
Re: Mutaa (split from Promiscuity thread)
Velvet i agree with you i think deela or his chap is just looking for someone to tell him its ok do it and he'll just ahead and hump women. He's got the mentality his grand ma and his mom have been brain washing him ever since. I am sure he has heard his mother say "Boys can do anything and they can go late and night and marry 3 women and then marry again because they are boys." He has gotten this sort of mentality by women who had to deal with the inferiority complex and now that he has lived with those women and gotten to understand them he knows that he's gonna get a wife who would think similarly that no matter who he shags or humps he's a "Man" and it will be ok. So in his mind he has no guilt of humping multiple women before marriage because in his mind everything is ok because he can get away with it just because he is a Man. And its our ladies fault for implementing this sort of mentality in their sons.
You've probably noticed that in our culture boys are allowed to do anything they want BUT when the girl turns 8 you'll hear the Nani or Ammi telling her "Cover your head and tie your hair" what do you think the boy will get by this?