SO by now you’ve all heard of the gruesome murder of Nazish Noorani, plotted by her own husband, carried out by his mistress. She had been a victim of domestic abuse for 6 years of her married life and her husband was known to have had a few extramarital affairs. Her family tried to convince her to leave him but each time she went to her family’s home, he’d come to get her, crying, and she’d go back with him because she didn’t want to leave him. Maybe it was because of her children…maybe she didn’t feel capable of raising them herself?
If he didn’t like her or she was coming in his way of a colorful lifestyle, he could have divorced her. Now he is in jail, wife dead, and the 2 children without parents.
The fact that this was plotted for some time shows he had serious mental issues for one can sometimes understand actions that are a result of a sudden rage or fit of anger. This is just one example of domestic abuse in our society. It is more common than we think but many women stay in that situation for ever. Why?
But, what have we as a community learned from all of this?
As for me, I am more and more convinced that my daughters need to be raised with an amazing sense of selfworth. They cannot ever feel that they are a burden on us, for they are not. What else?
I told you about this women I know who's husband is a drug addict, abusive , jobless , she has grownup kids who are on their own now and she does not want to get out of this marriage.
She is independent and pays money to him to go satisfy his addiction.
I fail to understand why ?
I am wondering the same. WHY could he not just divorce her if he didnt her in his life?! Maybe he was afraid she would badmouth him but is he going to get any better reaction now? :halo:
I think females (actually every human being) need to have…
Self Confidence
Good Education/Skills enabling them to earn/be independent if they want to.
The Strength to deal with such morons and to not give in to their pressure/emotional blackmailing.
The belief in Allah that if something doesnt go well in life, like marriage, its not the end of the world. And that there is a God up there who never leaves his people helpless at any time at all. One just has to have that strength of faith to go in life and Allah will be there to give them directions/opportunities at every step they take to betterment.
I told you about this women I know who's husband is a drug addict, abusive , jobless , she has grownup kids who are on their own now and she does not want to get out of this marriage.
She is independent and pays money to him to go satisfy his addiction.
I fail to understand why ?
unconditional love has limits too. This incident had saddened me an awful lot. Why, why do these women think they can let a man abuse them and play with their self esteem till the height of it all? Are they this worthless?
Parents need to inculcate self worth and self esteem in their daughters and instead of telling them in a typical way 'hamare khandan mei divorce naam ki cheez nai hoti..apne ghar se ab marr k he nikalna'...they should tell them that no matter what happens never let things get too far and wriggle out before things get too ugly for their sake and for their children's sake.
It's much better to raise ones kids alone without a dad then have a father like Nazish Noorani's husband (God forbid)
There has to be a reason why Islam allows divorce, khulla and polygamy :)
unconditional love has limits too. This incident had saddened me an awful lot. Why, why do these women think they can let a man abuse them and play with their self esteem till the height of it all? Are they this worthless?
Parents need to inculcate self worth and self esteem in their daughters and instead of telling them in a typical way 'hamare khandan mei divorce naam ki cheez nai hoti..apne ghar se ab marr k he nikalna'...they should tell them that no matter what happens never let things get too far and wriggle out before things get too ugly for their sake and for their children's sake.
It's much better to raise ones kids alone without a dad then have a father like Nazish Noorani's husband (God forbid)
There has to be a reason why Islam allows divorce, khulla and polygamy :)
Recent reports were saying that the family WAS trying to help her and urging her to leave him...but she wasn't ready to leave him.
Now the children are caught in a custody battle between the two families....the guy's family is saying the girl's family is unfit because they're not financially well off.
that might be your opinion but at least it's much better than the monogamy preached by Christianity and Hinduism . Worse the ritual of "satti' in Hinduism where a 'widva' has no identity herself and she's encouraged to burn along with her husband after his death !
Islam allows a woman to get Khulla from her husband when circumstances turn against her. And once free she can even marry again if she wishes to.
Am I reading this correctly? Is this news report alleging that Kashif Parvaiz was having an affair with an elderly man who was gave him a huge share of his estate?
I know a situation like that too lets see how that end up :( hopefully good inhshallah..this family I am talking about, the guy is a surgeon in canada, don't know how can be ppl be so messed up mentally and so successful professionally.
EDIT: oh just read that the guy didn't go to Columbia or Harvard as initially reported, how sad what a blo*** liar.
We need to teach the young generations that this is not tolerable. Many women suffer in silence, just because our society tells them that they must endure it, that it will get better. I mean, only just today I came across a thread, where the OP was being told to be ‘patient’. I know in Islam we must have sabr, but really, it is high time we all realise that there are situations where patience will just not help.
Argh! People just make me soo angry!
Having said all of that, I don’t think we should despair too much, I do feel society is changing, there are more educated women out there who know their rights. It all comes down to education, from school and at home.
Maybe he was afraid she would badmouth him but is he going to get any better reaction now? :halo:
