Mum and husband issues

[Iconoclast]

Re: Mum and husband issues

@Drama_Queen

Thankyou guys for your replies!!!

Yesterday i told my mum very strictly to let us deal with our problems ourselves. Nobody is perfect and it takes time to change a person, changes cannot happen overnight, and that its me who should change him not anyone else. Same as i would not like any inteference from my MIL. She understood and said she only want the best for me. She is right in her own way, its natural that she is being protective about me and all. The reason why it flared up was 5-6 days ago we were at my mums place and were talking about something when husband said, meray ooper shaitan chaya rehta hai and we fight a lot and oh i cant bring soda sulf all by myself i get shoulder pain, she has to bring it too we divide that task as well. This really upset my mum. I just stopped the discussion there before it went any further as i knew this could lead to arguements. I have no idea why he said that because as soon as we left mums place he said i didnt mean it! wth!

Anyways i cleared things up yesterday. And when my mum came half way to hand me over to my husband he was coming home from somewhere and it was cold and dark so i need to be handed over. My husband didnt come forward, he hid somewhere so he doesnt have to face my mum and sent me msg come without anyone. So my mum who was coming to say salam to to ease tings out , went away. This again led to a heated discussion between me and husband. grrrrr… i hated him for this. I tought salam dua would be good, eid is coming and didnt want the whole family to see the drama. Anyways, my mum called him today and they sorted things out. So hopefully everythings normal. Ive decided he wont be going to my mums place as often as before, better to have a distance now. Damaad should be a damaad not a son.

People who thought i was telling my marital details to my mum. Never! I dont discuss my married life with my mum. Whatever she said to him was based on her observation. He is a bit anti-social, over sensitive, fussy etc.. this worries my mum obviously**. He has told the whole story, the whole drama to his sister on skype. Dont think she thinks very highly of me now. He is getting lessons on being a majazi khuda and a hukmaran :S well well. She also said that me and my mum are trying to make her brother a ghulam since he has no one in this country. Now this brings up other issues!!!
**
I’ll just pray and try that he changes over the years inshallah, and he has changed a bit in the last two years that we have been together. I want the best for my baby, a strong father who can be a role model for him.

She is probably right since u urself have told ur mom not to be “bossy”, means she thinks she can boss him around.