So would you consider it? My husband is the only son and told me on our first date that if my in-laws didn’t want to move to the US, we would have to move back. Now that we have been married for almost 4 years (first date was almost 9 years ago Alhumdulilah!) the topic has come up again. I have NO issues moving back…but want to hear if anybody has experience it? I am a little nervous of the unknown…
We have a toddler and I think now would be a better time than later. Once the kiddos are older it would be harder for them to adjust to that lifestyle. What do you think?
As long is you're well off there, it's gonna be fine.
I don't know if that's necessarily true. There was a trend a few years back where I live where some of the younger couples were moving back to Pak from the US. They were okay for a year or so, but eventually couldn't handle it and moved back. There were a multitude of issues, but they were all pretty well-off. They just couldn't adjust to the lifestyle and the environment. I think it may depend more on how you were raised here, though. From what I gather from their stories, they just weren't able to cope with the security issues and the general gossipy environment. They also were thrown into a situation where htey had to interact with more family members than they ever had to before and I think the family dynamics were kind of overwhelming for them.
I'm not trying to deter you but I think people don't realize how different the lifestyle really is. Like my dad always says, you can have the biggest house and nicest car there but you still have to deal with the general uneducated public, drive on those same broken down streets with trash everywhere, and deal with load-shedding and all the other problems that come with Pakistan.
thank you soconfused, that make sense...the family interacter is dif. overwhelming even when we go visit. BUT we are thinking of moving to Islambad (job offers,) and neither of us have much family there, they are mostly in Lahore. So that might not be too much of a problem....i think. But something to think about.
Right before moving to the US (at age 11,) we lived in Karachi and that when all the mosque bombing and stuff was going on. I once was stuck at my school for hours due to shooting near by...so i have kinda lived it and we of course have considered the halaat for sure.
In my parents' generation that was always the intent, but that's not what happened for most of them. But that was when life in America still seemed filled with promise and tinted with gold dust. Things are different now. I'm sure you can the move at anytime, but I agree it's better when kids are younger.
Depends on the city. I was in islamabad for about 3 years. Quality of life and standard of living arent the same. I am a canadian so i compared to canada. I guess canada n US are same more or less.
There is a lot of difference in how ppl interact..a lot of materialism. The way you raise ur child is labelled "sensitive". Dont even mention the word germs there. They dont get it. At least not the ppl around me did.
No easily accessible libraries n no concept of going there. M sure wid a toddler u ll want to visit. I find food n clothes to b cheaper in canada compared to pakistan though salaries r higher here.
All in all one good thing is halal food.
All the best.
There used to be a forum for called r2i club/forum, where there were some really detailed discussions for people planning to move back to India. Some of those topics, you might find useful ( eg; pollution, extended family interactions, children, schools, chauffers, maids etc ). Might give you an idea about what all to consider before you make a move. I couldn't find anything similar for Pakistan. ( Maybe this thread is a start ).
I Know three families that moved to pakistan for various reasons.
Family 1: Had college-going kids; returned in about a year.
Family 2: Kids in high-schools; wanted to have a better mahol for the daughters ( go figure ! ); back within a year
Family 3: Kids in elementary school; settled in islamabad and happy.
Personally i would love to return to my home country but its so broken beyond repair that i won't be able to even think about moving back in my life time. If i were you i think the most important thing to consider is security and health care for yourself and children, somethings are more important than material posessions. If god forbid something health wise happened will you be able to feel that your family was getting the best care in pakistan?
There was a thread on GS about this, with the OP updating how his life is after moving from US to Pakistan. (If I remember correctly) Maybe you can try find it.
It's going to be tough adjusting to the lifestyle there if you're used to your freedom in the US. Safety is terrible in Pakistan. I've heard halaat are getting worse. No signs of improving. That's in Karachi- not sure about other cities though.
Now is a good time to move as your child is young.
Go visit Pakistan for 1-2 months, see if you think you can live there long term. It's a big decision. Hopefully you have the option of returning to the US if things in Pakistan don't work out. Is there no way your in laws can move to the US? Btw gd job in trying to keep ur hubby close to his parents. :) I'm sure you'll get rewarded for it! Good luck!
rabia u would do fine. U would be able to enroll baby in school and u need to just have a social circle of ur own to help u adjust otherwise it feels secluded. but thats with any move to any place.
everyone is going to mention the safty, and general conditions of the country and they will also say if your rich, your fine. I would say don't make the move, BUT only you know what is good for you and maybe you end up liking it more over there.
Before you guys sell off everything, and make a permanent shift back home. I really recommend spending a summer there. Why? You will see Pakistan at its worst possible, meaning low shading, extreme heat, and high electric bills from the AC being run. After a month or 2 you can have an idea of how it will really be like. And don't treat it as a vacation, act as if your really living there. This way it you still have a chance to change your mind, if you realize you dont like it.
Also, keep in mind, relatives overthere, are usually nice when they know your only in town for a couple of weeks AND your bringing presents from the US.When you will permanently live there, they will not treat you the same way. Not saying it as a bad way, but being honest.