Many times we see that some mothers don’t breastfeed their kids. Sometimes its due to some medical problem but a lot of times its also without any medical issue. My post is with reference to the latter.
Are these mothers to blame for not fulfilling their baby’s right? Even if they do not have a medical problem? Is it wrong to say that these mothers are depriving their baby?
I am kind of double minded about this issue, please share your ideas.
Re: Mothers not breastfeeding their kids
I think they are depriving their babies of the greatest gift they can give them, the health benefits of which are life-long.
Re: Mothers not breastfeeding their kids
There could be so many issues other than medical ones and honestly who cares if a mother bf or not? All mothers want the best and some are just more comfortable formula feeding than bfing.. It's okay whatever works for you.
Are you expecting? Whatever you decide to do, do it with confidence.. You are the mother :-)
Re: Mothers not breastfeeding their kids
As long as the baby is getting milk does it really matter?
Whether a mother breastfeeds or not shouldn't really be other ppls business imo..
Re: Mothers not breastfeeding their kids
I think most mothes try to BF as much as they can...but realize its also a bit of a painful process and very frustrating.
Don't judge - unless you know the specific reasons behind their actions - its not fair to say they just don't want to.
Re: Mothers not breastfeeding their kids
I totally understand when a mother has a medical issue or if they tried and tried several times but the baby just wouldn't latch and refused completely. In these cases it is completely understandable.
What I have a problem with is the following scenario:
My MIL told me how in the 70s it was "fashionable" to formula feed your babies. Even mothers that had no medical issues etc. wouldn't even bother trying to bf their newborns and just give formula from the start (partly because it was fashionable and also because of convenience). She told me of a few aunties in my in-laws side that did this. I personally think this is selfish. Their adult children now have quite a few health problems, despite leading a very healthy and active lifestyle (eat well balanced diet and work out).
Breastfeeding is the greatest gift you can give your baby. The health benefits are too great to not even at least "try" to do it.
Re: Mothers not breastfeeding their kids
I'm firmly on the side of not judging on this one. Mothering is a hard enough job without additional pressure and justification required for this very personal decision. Formula isn't poison and all health issues cannot be attributed to not nursing.
And what if you try and it doesn't work? Your child doesn't get the benefits same as the mom who chooses to formula feed. It makes no difference to the end result, kwim?
There's way too much competition between mothers anyway- the kind of gear you have, do you CIO, do you homeschool vs Montessori vs public school, do you birth vaginally or plan a C, did you take the drugs or not, are you a helicopter parent or more laid back, will your toddler watch no tv at all because it's the devil or spend his days watching tv and learning Spanish from Dora?, blah blah etc etc. And the worst is that mothers are the ones holding other mothers to these self constructed standards and tearing others down for their alternate beliefs. When are we women going to start supporting each other? Acknowledge the fact that everyone has bad days, no child is perfect or an angel all the damn time, and sometimes you really do just want to take the easy road because effitall, there are so many other things that you can't compromise on that might be more important to YOU.
What matters is this- is your child healthy? Are they growing? Are thy happy and secure and loved? Then well done, mama! You are doing a great job!
Re: Mothers not breastfeeding their kids
^Wish I could like that post 10 times over :k:
Re: Mothers not breastfeeding their kids
use your other multis
Re: Mothers not breastfeeding their kids
^Err I don't have any.. unlike some..
Re: Mothers not breastfeeding their kids
ermm but mother's milk is way more beneficial for the child, i think there is no 'scientific question' as to how it is the best for the child. Sure there are alternatives like formula or whatnot, but none of that is better than mother's milk. This is what i know, correct me if i am wrong.
I had a talk with a paediatrician , who said that there are very few cases of 'medical reasons'. Usually, when the kid doesn't latch, parents panic and start giving other stuff, however if they are patient, the kid eventually latches. He said that there are countless benefits of mothers' milk. It is easily digested and its very important for developing immunity and also for brain growth.
Now,if a mother was not giving meds to a sick child, she would be slaughtered, however not giving the baby equally important breast milk is sort of brushed off as insignificant. Why?
He also said another interesting thing, that the 'state of pregnancy' is actually a period of 2 years or so, in terms of physical state, attention and sacrifice needed of the mothers. As in, the mother needs to be devoted to the baby's needs ,physically and emotionally, even after giving birth.
Re: Mothers not breastfeeding their kids
^ Wish I could like this post 10 times. :k:
Now what are my multis ? 
Re: Mothers not breastfeeding their kids
^Err I don't have any.. unlike some..
just joking.
I came across a pic of a baby who didn't get breast milk and apparently he was in pretty poor health, can't find the pic though.
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Its not the 'healthy' as in desi terms aka fat/chubby that matters. What is important is that the kid is healthy and immune. I have seen some kids get real fat bubbles on formula milk (provided they look super cute :D ).
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None of us have argued against the benefits of breast milk ..yes breast is best,no doubt but like sgc said formula isn't poison either.
Re the health and what not.. My sister wasn't breast fed at all and I was for full two years.. Guess what? Both of us don't have health issues alhamdulillah.
Do you have kids? Did you bf? I swear its one of those topics that no one should have an opinion until they have been there, done that :-)
Re: Mothers not breastfeeding their kids
This thread is a bit judgmental and strange if you ask me.
OP...no one argues about the health benefits of mother's milk. We're arguing about how no one has the right to call out other women who BF or not.
Why?
Because there are VERY FEW mothers I have seen who are completely neglectful of their child in his/her first two years of life. Who ignores their kid's needs?
Its stating the obvious...all your doctor did was verbalize a very natural inclination a mother ALREADY has to take care of her baby. What you're stating is not a new phenomenon...maybe he was explaining what a mother is going through in the first two years of a child's life?
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While I would support and encourage any woman who is breastfeeding her child, I also don't think you can make ANY assumptions about why women do or don't breastfeed. The most important thing is to facilitate a calm, caring, and loving relationship. The child will be happy if the mama is happy. If the mama is more able to lead a fulfilling life and nourish her baby in other ways, then I say, go for it!
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People survive without vaccinations too. I think that is just a weak argument ''look nothing happened to so and so"
Why anything short of best is acceptable? Unless due to medical reasons offcourse.
Re: Mothers not breastfeeding their kids
And just what are these “medical reasons” that you find acceptable OP?
Re: Mothers not breastfeeding their kids
People survive without vaccinations too. I think that is just a weak argument ''look nothing happened to so and so"
Why anything short of best is acceptable? Unless due to medical reasons offcourse.
Because human beings and their relationships are complex. They can not be reduced to a simple formula. Good mothers and happy babies come in a variety of different forms and with varying practices and relationships.