Re: Most important decision of your life
EXACTLY!!!
Even Islamicaly, it’s not required for us to live with our in laws or serve them or do their housework or anything. Man, desis, they think if u say u wanna live away from ur in laws then ur a snobby or stuck up 
Re: Most important decision of your life
^ it doesnt say it in Islam, but helping someone out aint such a big deal either...
noone is thinking bad of u if u dont want to live with ur inlaws.. but whats the point in showing this sort of attitude now? ur inlaws arent ur dushman... they have a son who they love very much, and just cus he's married, doesnt mean he's not theirs anymore.. geez
b/w not everyone expects their son and his wife to live with them..
Re: Most important decision of your life
Um actually yeah, they will... and it is important to bring it up becoz if u say taht u dont want to live wiht ur in laws, ppl will react just the same if you told them you want to move in wiht your boyfriend....Not all in laws are dushman, but I've seen how sihtty some of htem can be towards the new bahu. N plus, it's not just the in laws thing... it's the fact that paki marriages, are supposed to be a union of two families, but in reality it's not.. it's the girl joining a new family, it's not even mutual. Girls make more sacrifices, adjusting to a whole new life, new people, new environment... why is it that the girls parents have ot go through the separation drama, and the guys' don't, since hes still under their roof?
Re: Most important decision of your life
^ its not true. Its not just the girl joining a new family. The guy has to make a lot of adjustments too and he also needs to be accepted by the girls family. A guy merely cant walk into a girls life and jsut go watever..
It IS the union of two families. U'll realise that as u get older though...
girls need to stop playing victim. Stand up for urself if thats the case. But dont go out with the notion that my mother in law is going to be bad.. that the only way my hubby will love me is if we move out of his parents house... wake up and realise, there are actual men out there and they arent going to expect u to live with their parents. Even if they do, what is the problem?
Guys go thru a lot too..
Re: Most important decision of your life
yeah well ur right... it's just stuff I've seen personally and the stories I've herd bout my mother's in laws, that really turn me off to the whole idea... hey if everyone can get along, then im cool wit it...
Re: Most important decision of your life
I think it is a matter of temprament too..some girls can't live with the guy's family. You can't force anything on anyone. If a girl is willing to find a match who suits her needs then more power to her.
However, I think family values are important and flexibility is the key to success. Anyone who is rigid in his/her views is a bad match to begin with. Life is too long and these thing don't even matter in the long run. oh well..same ol' immature bs
As for this thread...yes, bringing a life in this world is a major decision and it should not be done just for the 'sake' of it.
Re: Most important decision of your life
^ I think that’s why most women in the maternal feelings thread, are apprehensive about kids… we know the huge responsibility and change bringing a life into the world can bring, so it makes sense to be not so gung-ho about having kids… more ppl shud think long and hard before having kids and stop being so immature that they pop out children each time they open thier legs and ruin lives
Re: Most important decision of your life
It is always good to be responsible...however bitterness towards kids is uncalled for. :-)
Re: Most important decision of your life
Since when does not going googoogaga over some ppls kids = bitterness?
I feel like such a liar: i was talking to someone on MSN, and he used a “kaka” smiley and i was all “awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww” 
When I saw my cousins in pakistan…oh man lets just say…looking at them made me wanna get sterilized right on the spot 
Re: Most important decision of your life
agreed…
Re: Most important decision of your life
SADZZ i agree, sometimes its better to separate from in-laws before an arguement, just to keep the peace b'coz if things get nasty later its always hard to return to a compromise. in other words it keeps every1 happy, even if every1 is not happy with the decision.
Re: Most important decision of your life
Doing halfies is fine. But if u intend to live off ur bf/husband, u lose any say in how he keeps u. If u dont like it, no one is forcing u to stay with or r marry anyone.
free loaders!
Re: Most important decision of your life
^ The Quran says "and we made Men the protectors of Women"!
Re: Most important decision of your life
umm, have you bright thinkers ever considered the fact that the 30% or so Pakistani population who lives under poverty can't afford to live in separate housings?
Beside, this whole discussion wasn't the focus of the thread. All those who don't have kids will soon realize when you have one about how it changes your life.
Re: Most important decision of your life
If a guy wants to get married and wants to live at his mummys home than he is not ready for marriage.
Re: Most important decision of your life
Yeah, you said that before.
Re: Most important decision of your life
When it suits u, MAN is ur protector.
And when u get a good spanking (because u ask for it), then MAN is cruel, and Quran does not allow it 
Make Quran whatever u want it to be, huh?
Re: Most important decision of your life
^ you want to try your luck at that? what you think I'm just like your typical desi girl? Get a life all of you JERKS! So typcialllly!!
Re: Most important decision of your life
Majestic, you got to learn who's kidding, besides a good spanking once in a while never hurts :D